ew Page 3581 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
A Special Balls Deep Message To The Class Of 2008
This is BALLS DEEP With Drew Magary (Balls® is a registered trademark and has been used with the expressed written consent of AJ Daulerio). It's gonna be like an SI Point After column, only with dick jokes. Drew's new book, "Men With Balls," featuring 100 percent all-new material, is available here....
Thieves Boost Giants Super Bowl Rings
If you see a decidedly un-athletic-looking character parading around town with a Giants Super Bowl ring — and it's not Eli Manning — then please call your local authorities immediately. It's probably hot; part of the haul from big Attleboro jewelry heist this past weekend....
The Big Ball Orchard In The South Bronx
Slate's Robert Weintraub, like many of us, loves the old purple prose of early 1900s sportswriting, the Grantland Rices, the men who painted epic tales of warriors, grizzled combatants and lardywarks too manly to wear gloves. In an occasional series, Weintraub writes about the week's best baseball g...
The Gateway Grizzlies Will Clog Your Arteries If It's The Last Thing They Do
The team that gave you "Baseball's Best Burger" — a bacon cheeseburger with a Krispy Kreme doughnut used as a bun, has done it again. Now available at the Gateway Grizzlies concession area: Baseball's Best Soft Pretzel. And finally, that fifth doctor surrenders. Now five out of five doctors agree th...
The Sudden Plummet Of Dontrelle Willis
Seriously, what in the world has happened to Dontrelle Willis? The guy used to be the next great face of baseball, a smiling, lovable African American in a sport that desperately needs more, with a whirly-gig windup and a youthful vigor for the game we hadn't seen since Griffey. And now ... he's pit...
The Deadspin Editor Search Continues
So, several people have asked why I've been silent on Will's announced departure from Deadspin (if my mailman can be considered "several people"). Well, it's simple. I maintain that he's not leaving. You see, it's all an elaborate hoax, perpetrated by the same folks who faked the moon landing and bu...
Yankee Fans Even Hate Givers Of Life
Yes, bringer of life to the planet ... YOU SUCK! TRADE THE BUM!...
Goodbye To The Gap-Toothed Wonder
We don't know about you, but we'll kind of miss Michael Strahan, who retired from the NFL today, probably because he thinks coming off a title might make him John Elway. (It won't.)...
Joba Would Like To Take Off the Training Wheels Now
Until Hank Steinbrenner can get Dayan Viciedo signed, five innings of Joba Chamberlain are going to have to do. Chamberlain, who was lambasted by critics and audiences alike in his first starting role last week, came back with a slightly stronger effort on Sunday to lead the Yankees over the Royals...
Hand Me The Pissing Wedge
Urologist Floyd Seskin developed the UroClub (as opposed to the Spaniard-bashing stick I invented, the EuroClub) for golfers who would like to relieve themselves without the long trip back to the clubhouse. It's made to look like a 7-iron and make you look like a tool. And it's yours for the low, l...
Meet The Mets, Beat The Mets
A dastardly sot went after Mr. Met at a game last Saturday, the New York Post reports. So bound and determined was he to inflict pain on the mascot, he wasn't going to let children, or pregnant women or rare butterflies get in his way. Is hurting mascots all that fun? Seems like somebody has seen t...
This Should Quiet Those Stupid "True Yankee" Questions
This faithful little guttersnipe is Gerrit Cole, pictured here at the tender age of 11 attending the 2001 World Series, who this week was selected as the Yankees first-round pick. Yesterday capped a pretty good week for Cole, as the Bombers returned to .500, where they seems to be teetering lately,...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while hoping there's not a twist at the end of this one......
Wes Welker's Musical Belly Button Captivates Crowd
A few members of the New England Patriots got crazy karaoke-style for Larryoke, a charity event organized by Pats' special teams captain Larry Izzo. Those in attendance were blown away by Wes Welker's belly button rendition of "MacArthur Park". That thing's got some pipes....
So, Yeah, Active Week
• See ya, Hirshey. • See ya ... what? See ya ... us? • If the Cubs are gonna keep winning, at least this happened. • Uh, yikes. • This guy is the greatest. • Ron Artest, journalist. • Drew, out of the closet. • We're not sure we'd get along with Chuck Bednarik. • Everybody likes that Kimbo Slice cha...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you say goodbye to the Hockey Night In Canada theme song ... • Boxing: Light welterweights, Herman Ngoudjo vs. Souleymane M'Baye, in Montreal (8:30 p.m., ET). A limit of 140 pounds? My tonsils weigh more than that. [ESPN2] • College Baseball: NCAA Division I Tournament, super region...
Ty Lawson Latest Tarheel To Suffer Cruel Fate Of Demon Liquor
Ty Lawson, the UNC point guard who may or may not enter the NBA draft this year, was pinched last night by Chapel Hill police officers for driving while intoxicated. According to police, "Lawson was stopped early Friday morning because of the loud music coming from the car and the smell of alcohol ...
About Last Night
What you missed while using your binoculars to watch a bearded tit ... • NBA: Wheelchair basketball ... Pierce shakes off knee injury, leads Celtics over Lakers in Game 1. • MLB: Cole Hamels > Ken Griffey Jr. Phillies 5, Reds 0. • MLB: Please don't televise the draft again. Thanks....
The Blog Show Takes One Step Closer To Critical Mass
Any sports personality who's established a serious level of online notoriety now has a must-stop to truly establish themselves as an internet mega-star: Mottram and Steinberg's "Blog Show." The Comcast D.C. mini-sodes have risen from the depths of cable access-style shlockyness to fascinating and en...