f Page 1083 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Promise Of The AAF Has Been Made And Broken Before
Football is a lie unto the body. The better you tell it, the better you play. Whether running routes, disguising coverage, juking a defender, or pretending you aren’t hurt: Football is about deception. The Alliance of American Football began its inaugural season last weekend, when eight new football...
Yahoo Sports Columnist Pat Forde Cooked And Ate This Mess
Once, long ago, I was staying the night at a friend’s house when his family’s very old Basset Hound, Frances, took an extremely unpleasant shit on the kitchen floor. There was a sturdy mound of dense turds coated in an expanding puddle of glistening, phlegmy ooze, and it had a stench that could brea...
Alex Jones's Feud With Joe Rogan Is Just As Stupid As It Was Inevitable<em></em>
Like two neutron stars slowly pulled together by their mutual gravity, orbiting around each other before collapsing together and obliterating everything in space around them, Alex Jones and Joe Rogan are beefing....
College Softball Coach: The Only Reason I Constantly Walked In On Players Changing Was To Use Microwave<em></em>
The University of Missouri-Kansas City women’s softball team is embroiled in a long-running controversy surrounding one of its assistant coaches. According to a report by The Kansas City Star, Greg Bachkora allegedly engaged in sexual harassment and other inappropriate behavior around the players, a...
Despite Claims To The Contrary, The IAAF Is Still Persecuting Caster Semenya
The Times reported yesterday that the International Association of Athletics Federation (IAAF) will argue in front of the Court for Arbitration for Sport (CAS) that Caster Semenya, the 2016 Olympic champion in the 800 meters, is “biologically male.” The IAAF quickly issued a statement denying this c...
David Stern: Colin Kaepernick Would Still Have A Job If The NFL Had Been Smart Enough To Suspend Him
Former NBA commissioner David Stern was a guest on the Bloomberg Business of Sports podcast, where he attempted to take a jab at the NFL by arguing that if Colin Kaepernick had been a basketball player, his protest against police brutality and social injustice would not have cost him his job. ...
The Sports Highlight Of The Day Is These Noble Ski Dogs
The setting is a ski slope in Montana, per the tag on the video. The conditions are fresh and powdery, with even more flakes coming down. The dogs are dumb and happy, until they are fast, sleek, and hurtling like little fur missiles downhill. This is pure....
Sergio Ramos May Have Earned Himself A Suspension With His Big, Dumb Mouth
When you’re part of a top European soccer club, it’s probably easy to forget that the rules, at least in theory, apply to you as well. Whether that’s Manchester City wiping their collective asses with the Financial Fair Play regulations, or Barcelona players gleefully indulging in tapping up (the eq...
Is Papa John A Sincere Kentucky Fan?
So Bob Costas spoke openly to Mark Fainaru-Wada and ESPN—to his eventual regret, he says—about being gradually phased out at NBC after his bosses chafed at him accurately claiming that the sport of football destroys brains. You can easily read the story and see that Costas was right to speak openly ...
Steve Kerr Goes Fucking Ballistic At The Climax Of A Warriors Meltdown
In the fourth quarter of Wednesday night’s Warriors-Trail Blazers game, referee Kenny Mauer went to the replay monitor to check a hard foul from Draymond Green on a cutting Zach Collins. The game had already gotten chippy, after a huge Collins chase-down block at the other end seemed to unsettle the...
Denver's Joe Flacco Trade Gets The Coveted Mike Francesa Seal Of Approval
John Elway has a very poor history of acquiring quarterbacks for his Denver Broncos. This isn’t to say he can’t do it, or that he’s doomed to failure, or even that all his failures to date are necessarily his fault. Maybe he’s been really unlucky! Point is, if you’re looking for evidence that being ...
Poop Johnson Is Back In The News
No, his first name is not really “Poop.” It’s Cory. That doesn’t take anything away from how this transaction was delivered, though:...
Prosecuting War Criminals Would Be A Lot Easier If Not For The United States' Resistance
This piece is part of a recurring series that aims to be a complete guide to the laws of war. You can read previous entries here....
Report: Browns Owner Jimmy Haslam Is A Big Pouty Baby
Just two years into a four-year advertising deal with ESPN, Browns owner Jimmy Haslam is cutting it off, reportedly because he’s upset about a story ESPN published a few weeks ago about Haslam’s chaotic and unsuccessful ownership of the Cleveland Browns, the Sports Business Journal reported today. ...
John Elway Will Trade A Pick He Would've Screwed Up Anyway For Joe Flacco
Last season’s Denver Broncos went 6-10 with an unimpressive 30-year-old quarterback, putting them in position to pick in the top 10 for the third time in the last 27 years. Their poor record, formidable division, and need to actually rebuild would seem to make them a curious candidate to pay up for...
Report: Big Dumb President Spent $50,000 On Big Dumb Golf Simulator
If you’ve ever been to the golf section in a sporting goods store and taken a whirl on the golf simulator—in which you just whack a golf ball into a virtual screen six feet in front of you—you’ve probably wondered what kind of asshole would actually pay to have one installed in their house. Well, to...
Big Boban Flicked One Over Small Al
It’s always a treat to see the hands of Boban Marjanovic manipulate a tiny basketball. During the Sixers’ loss to the Celtics Tuesday night, the Philly center was regularly corralling rebounds without leaving the floor. He snagged this one like an apple off a high branch:...
Joel Embiid Ends Press Conference By Declaring That The Referees "Fucking Suck"
The freshly beefed-up Philadelphia 76ers faced a reeling and miserable Boston Celtics team in Philly last night, and thus had the opportunity to put a signature win on their increasingly hated rivals. Instead, they got beat 112-109 (despite the Celtics not having Kyrie Irving on the floor), and Joel...
Dan Snyder's Sleazy Stadium Scheme Is Crumbling Around Him
Dan Snyder’s underhanded scheme to plop a new home for his constitutionally corrupt and dysfunctional football team somewhere in the DC metropolitan area is suddenly in the deepest of shit. The DC power-move went to shit, and now the proposed site in Maryland, the acquisition of which would’ve requi...
Papa John Joins Long And Noble Tradition Of Asshole Kentucky Bandwagoners
Disgraced pizza man Papa “John” Schnatter, having been ostracized by the University of Louisville after he was revealed as a racist and a horrible boss, has evidently abandoned all support for his formerly beloved Cardinals. Instead of continuing to root for Louisville despite the removal of his nam...