f Page 1113 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
What Is Your Dumbest Flight Fuck-Up?
I’m writing this blog from a weird airport bar while drinking the smallest $12 glass of wine I’ve ever seen, feeling both relieved and very stupid. Earlier today I was supposed to take a flight from JFK to Seattle to visit one of my college roommates. Our other college roommate was flying in from D....
There Is Video Footage Of Jordan McNair's Final Practice, But Maryland Refuses To Release It<em></em>
According to a report from the Baltimore Sun’s Talia Richman, there is video footage of Jordan McNair’s final practice with the Maryland football team, footage that could potentially help illuminate the circumstances of his tragic death from heatstroke....
Khabib Nurmagomedov Is Going To Fuck Conor McGregor Up, Unless Conor Fucks Him Up First (He Might)<em></em>
There’s a rather elemental question at the heart of mixed martial arts: who would win in a fight between a dominant wrestler and a fearsome striker? It’s a question the sport has been asking for two decades, and one that, by its nature, will never be convincingly answered, because it depends on the ...
Clay Travis, Whose Book Didn't Sell: Nobody Likes Me Or My Book
Right now, the red glow from Clay Travis’s ass is visible from 100 miles away. His book Republicans Buy Sneakers Too, a title that aged very poorly from when it was announced to when it was published, has also sold very poorly....
It's The Perfect Storm For Offenses In The NFL
The NFL is in the midst of a genuine offensive revolution. It’s also the latest phase of an evolution, given that teams have been passing more frequently and attacking defenses with additional receivers since the early part of this decade. But this year, something’s up. Way up. Scoring is off the ch...
Kyrie Irving Says He Intends To Re-Sign In Boston Next Summer
Rotten news, Knicks fans: Kyrie Irving told an assembly of Celtics season ticket holders that he plans to return to Boston in free agency in summer 2019. And if you’re clinging to the hope that he was just saying that to ingratiate himself with Celtics diehards, he went into greater detail Friday at...
The Sports Highlight Of The Day Is This Determined Dog And His Powerful Tongue
It is the dream of all dogs to spill the treat container so that the treats held within it may be scattered about and easily consumed. This dream came true for a dog named Zeus, and even when his owner and a closed door conspired to deny him his bounty, he persisted....
This October, Root For Your Coworkers' Misery
The Nationals are despicable and I hate them, and anyway they’re out. The Orioles were the lousiest team in living memory this year. As a baseball fan in and from the broader D.C. area, I’m stranded in these playoffs, with no obvious rooting interest—except one: the joy of my dear coworkers’ sadnes...
Adam Ottavino Overthought It
During the regular season, Rockies reliever Adam Ottavino worked 36 at-bats to an 0-2 count. Hitters went 0-36 against him in those situations, and 31 of them ended up as strikeout victims. It’s hard to understand, then, how this happened:...
Hernan Perez Went On A Gatorade Odyssey And Got The Wrong Guy Anyway
The vagaries of walk-offs and crowd dynamics meant that when Mike Moustakas singled in Christian Yelich to win Game 1 for Milwaukee, the dugout chased Moustakas, eventually settling in right-center field, where the Brewers jumped, slapped, and celebrated. One problem with that: It’s a long way to go...
Yep, Max Muncy
Hyun-Jin Ryu pitched seven dominant innings, and the Dodgers walked a whopping eight times against Braves pitchers, but it was late-blooming-ass, rags-to-riches-ass, minor-league-veteran-ass Max Muncy who dealt the heaviest blow in Thursday night’s 6–0 Dodgers win over the Atlanta Braves, in Game 1 ...
Brian Bowen's Dad Describes Black Market Payments For Top Recruits At Every Level Of "Amateur" Basketball
Brian Bowen’s dad testified Thursday in the federal criminal trial of agent Christian Dawkins, Adidas executive James Gatto, and former Adidas operative Merl Code, who are accused of committing felony wire fraud as part of the FBI’s massive investigation of corruption in basketball recruiting. Bowen...
Brewers' Big Name Acquisitions Come Through In Game 1 Walk-Off Win
The Brewers got nine innings of excellent pitching in a 10-inning game, and won on a walk-off single in extras from Mike Moustakas, to grab Game 1 of their NLDS matchup with the Colorado Rockies....
Yankees Further Endear Themselves To Boston By Crossing Hotel Workers' Picket Line
Marriott hotel workers are striking in Boston, San Francisco, and San Jose this week. Unite Here Local 26, the union representing the striking hotel workers in Boston, has organized its members around the slogan One Job Should Be Enough, and after months of negotiating with Marriott, last month 96 p...
J.R. Smith Will Give Fan $600 For Tossing His Phone Into Construction Site
Cavaliers guard J.R. Smith, who will be startled some time in late November when he realizes he has inbounded the ball to Collin Sexton and not LeBron James, will pay a fan $600 after hurling the man’s phone into a Manhattan construction zone in late July. ...
Jon Gray's Strange Season Looks To Have Reached A Depressing End
Back in April of 2017, Rockies pitcher Jon Gray was the team’s Opening Day starter, and seemed destined to become the franchise’s future ace. Today, it was announced that he has been left off the Rockies’ NLDS roster....
Portuguese Soccer Officials And Juventus Offer Dumbass Thoughts On Cristiano Ronaldo Rape Allegations
Earlier today, Portugal’s national team manager, Fernando Santos, and the country’s soccer federation president, Fernando Gomes, competed to see who could be the biggest, most tone-deaf moron when they each offered their commentary on the rape allegation attached to Cristiano Ronaldo. Not content wi...
Prosecutor In Farcical Brett Kavanaugh Hearing Was Part Of Same Office That Let Kevin Johnson Walk Away From Sex Abuse Charges
Rachel Mitchell, the GOP hired gun who shot blanks during last week’s Brett Kavanaugh hearing, told Republican senators immediately after the public fiasco (but before the FBI investigation had begun) that she would not have prosecuted the nominee for his alleged assault of Christine Blasey Ford....