f Page 1140 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Buncha Wilmers
It’s true! The Mets infielder is Wilmer Alejandro Flores, while his brothers are Wilmer de Jesus Flores and Wilmer Rafael Flores. That’s even more Wilmers than there are Rougneds....
Victim Of Golf-Course Finger Biting Said It Sounded "Like Someone Chewing On A Dorito"
Derek Harkins, a 46-year-old Massachusetts man, was arraigned in Plymouth District Court on Monday on charges of assault and battery, mayhem, and disturbing the peace, after he allegedly bit off another man’s finger while trying to enjoy a golf outing....
Mike Lombardi Wrote Doug Pederson A Letter Apologizing For Being A Dummy
Football Knower Mike Lombardi infamously said that Eagles head coach Doug Pederson was “less qualified to coach a team than anyone I’ve ever seen” before the start of last season. Pederson went on to win the goddamn Super Bowl, and Lombardi has been eating crow ever since. Today, Pederson served him...
Washington Thinks The Solution To Their Running Back Problem Is Adrian Peterson (It's Not)<em></em>
Washington has solved their running back problem the same way they solved their quarterback problem: by picking up an old guy. After losing second-round pick Derrius Guice to a torn ACL, then watching both of his backups get hurt, Washington needed some help in the backfield. I’m not really sure if ...
Behold, Tomato Time Is Suddenly Upon You
A very long time ago (2015), our old buddy Tom Scocca posited, convincingly, that there are eight distinct seasons. This part of the year, from August through mid-September, he calls “Yellow Summer,” and ranks as the fifth-best season, which seems fine. After all, it’s muggy and buzzy and gross outs...
Why Your Team Sucks 2018: Seattle Seahawks<em></em>
Some people are fans of the Seattle Seahawks. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Seattle Seahawks. This 2018 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group. Read all the previews so far here....
All It Takes To Make A 49ers Game Fun Is A $12,500-A-Year Field-Level Leather Recliner<em></em><em></em>
A floor seat at a basketball game has a powerful cultural weight. It helps that it’s the best and most exciting way to watch a basketball game, but it’s appeal goes beyond that. Those seats are where celebrities and investors go to see the game and be seen watching that game—a badge of wealth and pr...
New ESPN President Jimmy Pitaro Is Ready To Roll Over For The NFL
After five months in charge at ESPN, company president Jimmy Pitaro got up in front of a bunch of reporters on Friday and revealed his big new vision for the network. Based on Piatro’s comments, ESPN will stride boldly into the future by sticking to sports and playing lapdog for the NFL....
The Phillies Are Going To Miss The Playoffs Because They Keep Losing To The Mets
The Phillies played a marquee game on national cable last night, so of course they lost, falling 8-2 to the Mets in the 2018 MLB Little League Classic in Williamsport and losing a chance to climb back into first in the NL East. The Phillies lost 3 of 5 in the series, bringing them to 5-8 against the...
If VAR Is Good For One Thing, It's Embarrassing Gloating Fans
Few things in life are as satisfying as stunting in the face of an opposing fan after your team does something good. One of the only things that is better is when an opposing fan preens in your face prematurely and you get to return the favor. This is why the following interactions from this weekend...
Stephen A. Smith(?) Delivers Motivational Speech(??) To Syracuse Football Team(???)
How and why ESPN shout-master Stephen A. Smith ended up sermonizing to the Syracuse football team doesn’t really matter. Whether he was invited to meet the team or just happened to stumble into a room with a bunch of football players in it, something like this was always going to be the result:...
The Bills Are Upset Over Another Hard Jarvis Landry Block
A strong block from Browns wide receiver Jarvis Landry in Friday’s preseason game against the Bills has some Buffalo players calling him out for his history of aggressive, damaging plays—especially against their team. ...
Patrick Mahomes Announced Himself With A Bomb
Two competing imperatives are in play here. The first is to avoid paying attention to preseason NFL games. They mean nothing, no result and no performance can be used to predict or extrapolate anything of value (and that some results and some performances do forerun regular-season success just prove...
Stick All The Forks In These Losers
The Nationals got smoked Sunday afternoon, at home, by the garbage Marlins. Jose Ureña—yes, that fucking guy—pitched a dominant two-hitter for his first career complete game. Ureña, by the way, on top of being a shithead, is bad! He came into the game with a 3–12 record, and a crummy 4.74 ERA, and a...
Another Joint Practice, Another Huge Brawl
Folks, we’ve got another joint practice brawl, this time between the Colts and Ravens, at Colts training camp Saturday afternoon. The brawl appears to have started after Colts linebacker Antonio Morrison leveled Albert McClellan in a special teams drill, and McClellan jumped up ready to make war:...
Get A Load Of This Hot-Doggin' Strike-Throwin' Baseball Nun
The Chicago White Sox invited Sister Mary Jo Sobieck of Marian Catholic High School to throw out the ceremonial first pitch for Saturday’s game against the Royals. She did some early hot-dogging with the slick little elbow trick you see above, but that was really just a preview. Her first pitch, thr...
Tom Chambers Charged With Assault For Roughing Up Belligerent Jerk
Former NBA star Tom Chambers was charged with two counts of assault this week in Arizona, related to an April incident in Scottsdale where he roughed up a shitbag youth who allegedly said some very rude things to him while he was dining out....
Taekwondo Coach Reinstated By SafeSport Following Brief Ban Over "Decades Long Pattern Of Sexual Misconduct"
Jean Lopez—the former U.S. taekwondo coach who was banned in April 2018 following a report from SafeSport that described “a decades long pattern of sexual misconduct by an older athlete/coach abusing his power to groom, manipulate and, ultimately, sexually abuse younger female athletes”—will be rein...
Josh Gordon Returns From Unexplained Leave Of Absence
Josh Gordon’s unexplained leave of absence from the start of Browns training camp—something Gordon described as “part of my overall health and treatment plan” when it was announced back in July—is now apparently over. Gordon announced Saturday that he’s rejoining the team:...
Dramatic Dinger-Robbing Catch Denied By Beer
Diamondbacks outfielder Jon Jay had a rough, frustrating time Friday night. Twice he reached up at the outfield wall to make a play on a shallow dinger, and both times Padres fans beat him to the ball. All Jay came down with, in the end, were a few droplets of spilled beer, and disappointment....