f Page 997 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Mike Yastrzemski Disappoints Wife While Trying To Get To Second Base
Yet another relative of a Hall of Famer was promoted to the majors this past weekend. Mike Yastrzemski, grandson of Red Sox great Carl Yastrzemski, got the call up to join the dysfunctional Giants on Saturday, where he made his debut against the Diamondbacks. Yastrzemski finally got the first hit of...
What Can The Raptors Possibly Do To Make People Believe The Lie?
The Raptors took down the Bucks on Saturday, 100-94, to clinch an NBA Finals berth for the first time in franchise history. With that series victory, Toronto seemingly vanquished the infamous Drake curse, exorcised the demons of past postseason failures and even vindicated Kawhi Leonard’s place as ...
Art Briles Hired To Coach Football At Texas High School
On a Friday evening news dump just before the start of a holiday weekend, the Mt. Vernon Independent School district announced that it had hired ex-Baylor coach Art Briles to lead the Texas high school’s football team. Superintendent Jason McCullough said during a Facebook live session that the scho...
Texas Softball Pitcher Hospitalized After Teammate's Throw Hit Her Straight In The Face
Texas softball pitcher Miranda Elish was taken to a hospital on Friday during her team’s NCAA super regional game against Alabama after taking a throw directly to the face. The injury occurred in the second inning when Longhorns catcher Mary Iakopo fielded what she thought was a live bunt and tried...
Engineer Unwittingly Trips Balls On LSD From The '60s While Repairing Iconic Synth
Here is a delightful story about psychedelics to ease you into the long weekend. ...
This Kawhi Leonard Ball Fake Is Hypnotic
Kawhi Leonard has been doing a lot that’s reminiscent of Michael Jordan. The raw scoring—Leonard is up to 31.4 points per game this postseason—the shimmying midrange work, the perimeter defense. Add a new entry to the list: ball fakes only possible with enormous mitts. Check out this possession in G...
Dennis Rodman Accused Of Randomly Slapping Guest At His 58th Birthday Party
Dennis Rodman’s travel schedule can seem pretty hectic these days. Two weeks ago he was in Newport Beach, California, moseying nonchalantly around a yoga studio while several associates crammed un-purchased merchandise into handbags and reduced a huge amethyst geode crystal to a fine powder. Ten day...
Aaron Rodgers Loses Chugging Contest Among Milwaukee-Area Sportsmen
Since the Toronto Raptors have Drake cheering them on, the Milwaukee Bucks need their own celebrity row. Green Bay lineman David Bakhtiari has filled a spot more than once, and he’s excelled at acting as a Rally Packer for the crowd. All he has to do is chug beers, and the crowd gets fired up....
You’re Not Mapping Rats, You’re Mapping Gentrification
Where there are people, there are rats. Or, more accurately: Where there are well-off white people, there are complaints about rats. It’s just that two of the country’s biggest newspapers can’t seem to tell the difference....
A Good And Smart Preview Of A Wide-Open 2019 WNBA Season
Hockey is almost over, and the NBA is basically done, so now all we have to look forward to over these impending hot summer months is a World Cup, the ability to blast Bad Girls out of our apartment windows, and some goddamn WNBA basketball. That last thing starts tonight, folks! Let’s get to the pr...
Mike Francesa Warns That Meteorologists Are In The Pocket Of BIG TRAVEL
Memorial Day weekend is once again upon us. Americans across this great nation reserve this time for 72 somber and solitary hours spent quietly honoring the sacrifices of those who gave their lives in service of the United States Armed Forces, or alternately for several bitchin’ barbecues. Whatever ...
Drake Cuts Sweaty Promo About How Raptors Fans Are Really Good At Following The Rules
The Raptors beat the Milwaukee Bucks in Game 5 of the Eastern Conference Finals last night, and Drake, the Raptors’ rowdy uncle/human mascot, was not in the building. He was back home in Toronto, watching the game with thousands of Raptors fans in an outdoor square. He was so excited after the win t...
Raptors Defense Pushes Bucks To The Toilet's Edge In Game 5 Upset
The Milwaukee Bucks, the best team of the 2018–19 regular season and by far the best team through the first two rounds of the playoffs, find themselves in the deepest of caca following a 105–99 loss to the Toronto Raptors in Game 5 of the Eastern Conference Finals. The Bucks will have to stave off e...
Nike Called Out By Three Olympians Over Punitive Sponsorship Policy For Pregnant Athletes
American 800-meter specialist Alysia Montaño has won six national championships, but she may be most famous for running the 2014 race while eight months pregnant with her daughter. Montaño, a 2012 Olympian, also ran in 2017 while five months pregnant with her son. It takes incredible physical effort...
Adam Gase And The Jets Have Had A Crazy-Ass Week
It’s been a busy week or so for the Jets. Eight days have passed since general manager Mike Maccagnan was fired, after he had been kept on to lead such minor team-building exercises as the search for a head coach, a free-agency spending spree, and a draft in which the Jets possessed the No. 3 pick. ...
Kevin Durant Probably Won't Be Ready For Start Of NBA Finals, Will Have Time To Continue Posting
Here’s some news that, perhaps perversely, should increase interest in the upcoming NBA Finals:...
Let's Remember Some Guys: The Large Men Of Fleer
There are ways in which the basketball currently being played in the NBA is an evolved version of the basketball played there a decade or so ago. It really is more open in a bunch of ways, for instance, and as a result there are new possibilities in each game that simply would not have fit in the NB...
The Europa League Final Is Going To Be A Lowly Attended Disaster
The Europa League final is the debacle that keeps on giving. After Arsenal confirmed that midfielder Henrikh Mkhitaryan would not be playing the final in Baku, Azerbaijan due to his Armenian heritage, reports are coming out that the stadium might be half-empty for what is ostensibly the second bigge...
Chris Broussard Gets In His Car, Loudly Defends Himself From Kevin Durant
At some point on Wednesday, as nationwide support for the meteor intensified, Fox Sports scoopster Chris Broussard balanced his phone on the dashboard of his car and defended himself from Kevin Durant’s attacks on his credibility. At the end of the day, this is about ethics in pettiness....
Local Weatherman Is Fed Up With NBA Fans Complaining About A Tornado Warning Interrupting Game 7
Last month, Michael Wilbon got his undies in a bunch when a local CBS affiliate interrupted a Masters rerun with a tornado warning, and it turns out he’s not the only cranky sports fan out who can’t be bothered to think about potentially life-threatening weather systems when the game is on....