ff Page 561 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Donald Brashear Suspended Six Games For Breaking Faces
Six! One for pushing Colton Orr and five for a late hit on Blair Betts—so he'll miss Tuesday's Game 7 and most (maybe all?) of the next series if they win....

Someone Take Away Lane Kiffin's Phone
Even when Tennessee coach Lane Kiffin does something right he manages to do it wrong. It's not easy to turn a simple misunderstanding about trash-talking into a recruiting violation....

More Game Fours Than You Can Shake A Fork At
It's a Game 4 quadruple header today in the NBA Playoffs today. What will we learn?! Besides how many nachos can be consumed in an 11-hour period. Open thread your hearts out, hoop heads. [NBA]...

Rangers Coach Suspended For Fighting Fans
It looks like Sean Avery's hot-headed, loose cannon ways are rubbing off on his head coach John Tortorella, who got himself suspended for today's crucial Game 6 (on national TV!) against the Capitals....

Stafford Welcomed To Detroit With Warm, Prickly Arms
Yes, Stafford is now with the Detroit Lions. And who can blame them? They totally had the other team winning the 2008 Capital One Bowl. I'd boo too....

Your 2009 Detroit Lions Are Matthew Stafford And Ten Other Guys
The tension building around the first overall pick has been punctured with anonymous sources for, I think, the 312th straight year. We know that Matthew "Matt" Stafford will be the Lions' guy....

Dan Shanoff Deconstructs The Sideline Princess
"But watching her at the event confirmed what I had thought when I watched her on TV: She was down-to-earth and completely comfortable with herself." You cad! [The Sporting Blog]...

Gary Bettman Does Not Appreciate Your Octopus-Throwing Antics
A Red Wings fan throwing an octopus on the Columbus Blue Jackets home ice? Sir, this will not stand! (Scuffle ensues — see photo)....

Vancouver Blog Jinxes Canucks Early And Often
A Canucks blog is asking fans to submit their own user-generated Stanley Cup parade routes. Is there a route that takes them under the World's Largest Ladder? [The White Towel; via Puck Daddy]...

ESPN Headline Writers Are Witty Rapscallions
Well isn't that special. But in ESPN's defense, there's probably not a whole lot you can do with news like this. [ESPN]...

Detroit's Likely No. 1 Pick May Suffer From Dementia
The Lions are working hard to ink a deal before Saturday's draft with Georgia QB Matthew Stafford—who "indicated he would love to play in Detroit." That's your first warning sign right there. [ESPN]...

NHL Playoffs Operating With Deadly Efficiently
Boston brushed Montreal aside to complete their sweep last night and will see the second-round for the first time in 10 years. (Oh boy! More sports triumphs for Boston!) Meanwhile, we've already forgotten who the Canucks beat 4-0, Columbus neglected to set their alarm clocks for the Detroit series, ...

For Great Quality At A Low, Low Price, Come On Down During Aaron Curry Discount Days
Aaron Curry is shopping himself to the Lions via text message — which technically is SPAM — telling general manager Martin Mayhew he can be had for a song if he chooses him No. 1....

Yes, Hockey Does Have Buzzer-Beaters
After giving up a 3-goal lead, Carolina beats New Jersey on a slap shot with 0.2 seconds left in the game, which I guess is not a lot of time remaining.[NHL]...

Columbus Will Never Forget Its First Time
Down 0-2 to Detroit, the Blue Jackets host their first-ever home playoff game tonight and Puck Daddy has a tribute to other playoff virgins. Confused Buckeye fans are unsure what to burn. [Puck Daddy]...

Alexander Ovechkin Would Have Made A Lousy Cold War Spy
The Captials star was booted from the Rangers practice today "'because they're afraid of me,' he said with a smile." Really? Which of your first two home losses scared them the most? [NYPost]...

The Vancouver Canucks Have A Scouting Report On Your Wife
Here's another gem I missed from the first-round of the NHL playoffs. It seems that the Canucks are not only trouncing St. Louis on the ice, but they also lead in trash-talk opposition research....

NHL, NBA Playoffs Not Over Yet
How was your weekend? I had no access to the internet (or TV! The horror), but I trust that things around these parts were quiet and uneventful with little or no boat rocking whatsoever....

This Is One Way How A Cameraman Gets Injured During A Spring Football Game
The Montana State Grizzlies annual Spring football game was festive...until one of the Silver Tip skydivers landed on a cameraman, who according one reader, broke his arm as a result of the collision. [Missoulian]...

Sidney Crosby Gets The Philadelphia Salute; Deadspin Almost Falls Apart
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...