fl Page 321 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Life Must Go On During A Military Occupation
This piece is part of a recurring series that aims to be a complete guide to the laws of war. You can read previous entries here....
The Browns Are Being The Browns
Happy Halloween from Emergency Football Show Weekly! This week Dom and I discuss the Browns’ coaching changes, why morning NFL games are so great (Dom—and West Coasters—may disagree), Michael Dickson’s fourth-down run and Todd Gurley’s decision to go down before scoring a touchdown. Enjoy!...
Whoa, Hey, Some Football Players Got Traded
The NFL stove is notoriously ice fucking cold throughout the regular season, but teams have been feisty over the last few days, and some big-name players have been traded for significant draft picks. The league trade deadline passed at 4:00 p.m. EDT today, and would you believe it, some more guys go...
Ass Team Of The Week: Eli Manning And The New York Giants Will Break You
The New York Giants have transformed into a tremendous keister this season, the size and proportions of which have been amply documented on this very website. If you’re a regular reader you already know what the deal is: Eli Manning is old and shitty now and the offensive line can’t protect him and ...
Even The Mighty Premier League Must Bow Before The Power Of America's Stupidest Sport
Though I am a big fan of European soccer, I am an even bigger fan of massive, gaudy manifestations of American exceptionalism. And what better display of the U.S. in all its decadence and sun-blotting self-regard than us having our biggest, dumbest sport that nobody else cares about ruin the pitch o...
"Evolution" Was The Night WWE's Women Deserved. It Also Kicked Ass.
WWE Evolution started with a bang and ended in a torrent of cheers on the same Sunday night, but the promotion’s first-ever all-women’s pay-per-view event began in earnest some time before that. At a match in Abu Dhabi’s Zayed Sports City Tennis Stadium last December, Alexa Bliss and Sasha Banks, bo...
Adam Vinatieri Breaks NFL's All-Time Points Record, Receives Weird Congratulatory Video From Morten Andersen
Colts kicker Adam Vinatieri entered Sunday’s game against the Raiders just four points behind of Morten Andersen’s all-time points record of 2,544. After tying the record in the first quarter with a field goal and extra point, the 45-year-old veteran hit a 25-yarder near the end of the first half to...
Seahawks Ice Game With Punter’s Ballsy Fourth Down Run
The Seattle Seahawks called a unique play to ice the game against the Detroit Lions today: A nine-yard run by the punter from his own end zone on fourth and 8....
Fitzmagic (Sort Of) Returns After Jameis Winston Gets Benched For Throwing Four Interceptions
Jameis Winston was benched for Ryan Fitzpatrick today after his ass-tastic performance against the Cincinnati Bengals yielded four interceptions and five sacks in just under three quarters of playing time....
The Steelers Went Full-Rutgers And Forgot To Field This Safety Punt
Things were looking up for the Steelers about halfway through the third quarter. The Browns had committed a holding penalty in their own end zone, giving Pittsburgh two points off the safety which extended their lead to ten points. But the momentum came to a screeching halt for the black and gold wh...
Report: The Browns' Coaching Mess Might Require A Clean-Up
Failure that breeds dysfunction, which breeds potential coaching staff or front office changes. It might as well be the Cleveland Browns’ motto. That remains true even in a season in which the Browns are finally showing some signs of life. But Cleveland has lost three of its last four games, and the...
Florida State Got Whomped
Florida State lost to Clemson, 59-10, on Saturday, and that 49-point deficit tied for the worst margin in FSU history. It goes without saying that it was an ass-kicking. But how bad was it? This bad....
A Taxonomy Of Calls For Unity In The Hardcore Scene
On Leap Day several years ago, Bold, the hardcore band, played the East Village coke den Lit Lounge’s packed basement in front of a hundred or two hundred people. The band, well into their middle age, hadn’t released a record since 1989, and are best known for punk songs they wrote as teenagers. Sin...
Normal Joe Flacco Bought A Mattress From Sean Payton's Brother Down The Jersey Shore
The Saints beat the Ravens on Sunday on the rarest of rarities. So there would’ve been a lot to potentially talk about in the postgame meet-and-greet, but Joe Flacco got right to the important stuff: He needed to let Sean Payton know that Payton’s brother sold him a mattress on the Jersey Shore a fe...
Why Didn't The Raiders See If They Could Get More For Khalil Mack?
The Raiders got a good haul for all-world pass-rusher Khalil Mack, when they traded him to the Bears just before the start of the season. But that doesn’t mean they couldn’t conceivably have gotten a better one. Now there’s a report that says they didn’t even try....
The NFL Actually Fired An Official
Outside of the confusion about roughing-the-passer calls (which falls as much on the diktat from New York as on those tasked with enforcing it), it feels like NFL officiating has generally been pretty good this year—that is to say, it’s been largely unnoticeable. Which made this blatantly missed fal...
How The Fuck Did So Many Teams Pass On Patrick Mahomes?<em></em>
Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here. Buy his book here....
<i>Emergency Football Show Weekly</i>: The Eagles’ Super Bowl Hangover
Just a few weeks ago the Eagles were still on top of the football world. They’d won their first Super Bowl in February, and then appeared to reload in the offseason for a shot at another one. The team would be healthier, it seemed; Carson Wentz would be back. They upgraded at a few positions and did...
NBA Admits Refs Were Suckered By Joel Embiid's Theatrics
Joel Embiid got Andre Drummond ejected during the final minute of regulation in Tuesday night’s eventual overtime Pistons win, by throwing himself on the floor like a big old goof after incidental contact with Drummond’s hand. The two behemoths have spent the hours since chirping at each other throu...
Let’s Remember Some Guys: 1990 Football Guys
Football in 2018 is sleek. It is about scoring and speed. The players do not want to be encumbered by extraneous protective equipment. Shoulder pads have gotten smaller and smaller, and the frontier is being pushed every day. Michael Bennett wears kicker shoulder pads....