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![A Bullshit Penalty Let The Vikings Tie The Packers [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/cjsfxubowdd5gqxjfgy1.gif)
A Bullshit Penalty Let The Vikings Tie The Packers [Update]
The NFL’s absolutely terrible and impossible new definition of roughing the passer—which prohibits defensive players from landing on quarterbacks with their body weight—came into play during today’s Vikings-Packers game and directly affected the outcome. In what eventually became a 29-29 tie (don’t ...

Saints Become First Team To Beat Browns In 37 Weeks<em></em><em></em><em></em>
The New Orleans Saints snapped their winless streak that dated back over eight months, and ended the Browns’ lengthy undefeated stretch of 37 weeks, by taking down undefeated Cleveland this afternoon, 21-18....

Taiwan Jones Injured On Helmet-To-Head Hit
Taiwan Jones suffered a scary-looking injury in the third quarter of the Bills’ game against the Chargers today. He picked up a muffed punt, lost his helmet and took a helmet-to-head hit in his own end zone....

Damontae Kazee Ejected For Late Helmet-To-Helmet Hit On Cam Newton<em></em>
A 10-yard fourth-down scramble from Cam Newton led to a brutal head-to-head collision and an ejection for Falcons safety Damontae Kazee in the second quarter of today’s Panthers-Falcons game. Newton slid down at the end of his run and took a straight-on helmet-to-helmet hit from the Falcons defender...

Titans Run A Very Neat Fake Punt For 66-Yard TD
Two Tennessee Titans safeties—All-Pro Kevin Byard and fifth-round rookie Dane Cruikshank—combined to shock the Texans on their team’s opening drive, connecting on a 66-yard pass for the first fake punt touchdown of the season. ...

Aaron Rodgers's Knee Is All Messed Up, But He's Still Going To Play
Aaron Rodgers is officially active for the Packers’ game against the Vikings today, after a week of uncertainty due to a mysterious knee injury suffered in the second quarter of the season opener against the Bears....

Floyd Mayweather And Manny Pacquiao Will Stage History's Least Wanted Rematch
Who knows what to make of this. Floyd Mayweather said on Instagram Saturday that he will come back from retirement this year for a rematch of the insanely boring 2015 “mega-fight” with Manny Pacquiao....

Michael Bidwill Still Thinks High School Pal Brett Kavanaugh Should Be Confirmed To The Supreme Court
Arizona Cardinals President Michael Bidwill directly mixed politics with football—maybe he wouldn’t think so, but that’s what he did—in July, when he used the team’s website to support Supreme Court nominee Brett Kavanaugh, his old high school classmate at Georgetown Prep. Although Kavanaugh, who is...

Geno Atkins Wrecked The Ravens
The clip above shows Bengals defensive tackle Geno Atkins chasing down a quarterback for a sack in the open field. So what if Ravens QB Joe Flacco isn’t all that fleet of foot? Atkins weighs 300 pounds. Like a bowling ball rolling downhill, he quickly covered a lot of ground to make that play. It ha...

Jerry Jones The Owner Might Want To Have A Word With Jerry Jones The GM
The hot new trend for NFL teams looking to establish and sustain success is to construct a deep roster around a young quarterback on a cost-controlled contract. The Eagles won last year’s Super Bowl doing this. The Rams, Bears, Chiefs, Buccaneers, and Titans are using the same blueprint this season....

Steve Smith And Michael Irvin Are Still Not The Best Of Friends
Since retiring from the NFL in 2017, Steve Smith has made the seamless switch from a brash, loud-mouth receiver to a brash, loud-mouth analyst on the NFL Network. In this latest example, Smith, who played for the Ravens from 2014-16, snapped on fellow analyst Michael Irvin after he said Anquan Boldi...

Roger Goodell Is Trying His Best To Appear Woke
Kaepernick collusion case be damned, Roger Goodell is trying his best to be the corporate face of social progress for the NFL....

White-Collar Crime Is Apparently Not Enough To Halt An NFL Career
After pleading guilty to federal charges of insider trading, linebacker Mychal Kendricks will be sentenced in January of next year. That doesn’t mean he can’t still continue his side hustle as a pro football player, though....

Why Is The <i>Sunday Night Football</i> Intro Song Always So Fucking Awful?
Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here. Buy his book here....

I Did Not Buy 6,500 Pairs Of Nikes To Send To The Dump, But Thousands Of Idiots Think I Did
First off, let’s get something out of the way: I did not purchase $1.3 million dollars’ worth of Nike Air VaporMaxes (White/Varsity Purple/Metallic Silver/Aqua, size 9.5) with the intent of shipping them to the Glendale city dump....

A Frank Talk About Jacking It With Your Pals
The NFL: It’s for sure happening again, and it’s fine. It’s not ideal, a lot of it is really honestly pretty bad and shitty to watch, but it’s happening. There’s no way around the fact that it’s certainly happening. The games count, and that some of it at least is fine; the Browns and Steelers tied,...

Doug Marrone Claims He's "So Pissed Off" At Not Reaching A Super Bowl That He's Never Watched One
Jaguars coach Doug Marrone probably should have coached in the Super Bowl last season and, if he had, he would have witnessed his first Super Bowl action in, uh, over 40 years, somehow? Marrone told ESPN today that he didn’t watch last season’s Super Bowl, not even to scout for the Patriots this wee...

This Is The Showboatingest Homer I've Ever Seen
We have an extremely good controversy out of Southern Ontario’s Intercounty Baseball League, where the Barrie Baycats took down the Kitchener Panthers last week in a six-game series for their fifth straight championship. ...

A New Jersey federal judge dismissed a class-action lawsuit that accused the New York Jets of screwing over PSL holders. “Agreement expressly disclaims that plaintiff is not acquiring the PSL as an investment or with a view to profiting from future distribution or resale, and further that Defendants...