foot Page 306 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Roger Goodell Is Trying His Best To Appear Woke
Kaepernick collusion case be damned, Roger Goodell is trying his best to be the corporate face of social progress for the NFL....
Why Is The <i>Sunday Night Football</i> Intro Song Always So Fucking Awful?
Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here. Buy his book here....
I Did Not Buy 6,500 Pairs Of Nikes To Send To The Dump, But Thousands Of Idiots Think I Did
First off, let’s get something out of the way: I did not purchase $1.3 million dollars’ worth of Nike Air VaporMaxes (White/Varsity Purple/Metallic Silver/Aqua, size 9.5) with the intent of shipping them to the Glendale city dump....
A Frank Talk About Jacking It With Your Pals
The NFL: It’s for sure happening again, and it’s fine. It’s not ideal, a lot of it is really honestly pretty bad and shitty to watch, but it’s happening. There’s no way around the fact that it’s certainly happening. The games count, and that some of it at least is fine; the Browns and Steelers tied,...
At Least One Nathan Peterman Defender Exists, And He's A Shitbird
The Buffalo Bills officially announced on Wednesday that flailing intern Nathan Peterman would no longer be their starting QB, to the relief of Bills fans and probably Peterman himself, who never asked to become synonymous with incompetence just because his team had an irrational fear of Tyrod Taylo...
Sean McVay Is Doing The Spooky Brain Thing Again
They say that humans only use 10 percent of our brains. They go on to say that the claim that humans only use 10 percent of our brains—in addition to being a major plot point of the delightful Albert Brooks movie Defending Your Life—is a myth. Truly they cannot be trusted on this matter, but this mu...
Antonio Brown Apologizes For Threatening To Slug ESPN Writer Over Unflattering Profile
Last week Jesse Washington of The Undefeated published a story about Antonio Brown of the Steelers. It’s at once an especially 2018 kind of profile—the word “Instagram” appears 24 times, there are another three “’Grams,” and a further seven embedded Instagram posts—and a weirdly dissonant, pearl-cl...
We Think We Know Who Will Win The Super Bowl
It’s fine to know nothing about football. It’s also fine to know everything about football. What I know about football is: nothing....
Never Mind, The Raiders Actually Want Martavis Bryant Now
The Oakland Raiders dropped wide receiver Martavis Bryant 11 days ago, insisting at the time that the guy they traded a third-round pick for on draft night wasn’t released because of a possible drug suspension, but rather because he wasn’t very good and kept missing practice. Now, they’ve taken him ...
A New Jersey federal judge dismissed a class-action lawsuit that accused the New York Jets of screwing over PSL holders. “Agreement expressly disclaims that plaintiff is not acquiring the PSL as an investment or with a view to profiting from future distribution or resale, and further that Defendants...
Georgia State Coach Shawn Elliott Tore His Biceps Celebrating Touchdown In 41-7 Loss
Showing the unbridled enthusiasm of an assistant special teams coach, Georgia State head coach Shawn Elliott celebrated so hard after his team went up 7-0 on NC State last weekend that he tore his right biceps. He told reporters today that he will get surgery next week, which means Elliott will coac...
I Drafted My Fantasy Team Based On A Rigorous Evaluation Of NFL Players' Social Media Personalities
This week, Deadspin and Jezebel swap beats to celebrate America’s most dangerous and controversial pastimes: football and fashion, two sports that have far more in common than you think....
Hugh Freeze Thinks The "Climate In America" Is Keeping Him Out Of College Football
Hugh Freeze, a man whose horniness (or “moral turpitude,” if you’re a university official tasked with announcing his firing) got him shit-canned from Ole Miss a month out from the 2017 college football season, is now not so sure his dick is the only thing to blame for his unsuccessful job search....
Bills Finally Admit Nathan Peterman Has No Business Being A Starting QB
The Buffalo Bills have finally stopped trying to make Nathan Peterman happen. Head coach Sean McDermott said today that rookie quarterback Josh Allen would start this Sunday for the Bills’ game against the Chargers....
Still No Le'Veon Bell
It’s Wednesday, the Pittsburgh Steelers are about to start their weekly team meeting, and Le’Veon Bell is reportedly nowhere to be found....
Yet Another Pitcher Has The Baby Disease
Astros reliever Brad Peacock has been diagnosed with hand, foot and mouth disease and sent home from the team, becoming the third MLB pitcher this season to contract the viral infection that usually only affects infants and children under five years of age. What is going on??...
Report: Florida High School Football Coach Accused Of Head-Butting And Blowing Snot-Rockets On Players, Telling One To Kill Himself
This is a crazy story, first reported by the Palatka Daily News, in Florida: Randell Gene Owens, a former assistant football coach and physical education teacher at Palatka High School in Putnam County, is accused of, shit, just a whole wild catalogue of alarming abuses directed at his players....
The Skins Are About To Officially Lose Another Bullcrap Attendance Streak
The news in this Washington Post report is less that the Skins will fail to sell out their home opener against the Colts Sunday—their streak of sellouts has been illegitimate garbage for literally years—and more that the Skins have reached such a state of desperation that they’re finally revealing, ...
Never Forget Dan Snyder's "Fifth Anniversary Of 9/11" Skins Caps
Today marks the 12th anniversary of Dan Snyder selling five-year anniversary 9/11 memorabilia for profit....