football Page 416 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

I Respectfully Disagree With Aaron Lynch's Assessment Of The 49ers

I think it’s a good thing for athletes to express confidence in their own team and abilities, and given how many bad teams there are in the NFL, I can kind of see how 49ers linebacker Aaron Lynch could convince himself that his 1-6 squad is actually good and not bad. ...

Joey Bosa Appears To Be Good As Hell

Remember those anonymous NFL executives who wanted you to believe that Joey Bosa’s rookie season was going to be a wash because he missed training camp and preseason? Remember how the Chargers thought it was a good idea to engage in a long and ugly contract standoff with Bosa over little things like...

UCF Beats UConn In Forced Rivalry Game, Leaves Dumb Trophy On Field

Central Florida defeated UConn, 24-16, Saturday in the fourth installment of the greatest artificial college football rivalry ever: The Civil Conflict. My mistake—it’s actually the Civil ConFLiCT....

Todd Graham Confronts "Chickenshit" Mike Leach During Post-Game Handshake

The Pac-12 fined Washington State head coach Mike Leach $10,000 earlier this week for claiming Arizona State steals signals from opposing teams—something Sun Devils head coach Todd Graham admitted to last year. Graham wasn’t taking kindly to the allegations this time around, though, telling Leach du...

Penn State Shocks Ohio State With Winning Touchdown Off Blocked Field Goal

Unranked Penn State knocked off #2 Ohio State when Grant Haley scooped up a blocked Buckeyes field goal and took it to the end zone, giving the Nittany Lions a 24-21 win after their defense stopped J.T. Barrett and the Buckeyes offense....

Look Out!!! Look Out!!! Look Out!!!

Leonard Fournette isn’t done putting defenders in their place....

J.T. Barrett Swarmed By Three Defenders In Backfield; Somehow Turns It Into 19-Yard Gain

Ohio State quarterback J.T. Barrett is an absolute magician. Here he avoids three Penn State defenders surrounding him in the backfield and gets 19 yards in a play that looked so impossible officials decided to review it (and upheld the results after getting a second look)....

Colorado Gives Up Two Safeties On The Same Play

Colorado is in the midst of its best season in years, earning its way to bowl eligibility today with a 10-5 win over the once-seventh-ranked Stanford Cardinal. But even with its inexplicable 6-2 record, the Buffaloes still showed some of that haplessness that was a hallmark of the program for a deca...

Also, Alabama Is Losing

CBS's Brian Jones Rants Against Targeting Rule

Brian Jones failed out of the NFL due to injury—he even filed, and lost, a lawsuit over it—but don’t tell him that the sport of football needs rules to protect players’ long-term health. The CBS college football analyst alternately demanded players grow eyes in the back of their head or barked “KEEP...

Beer Titties Metal

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Here Are All The Times The NFL Got Josh Brown Records From The Sheriff's Office

Once again, the NFL has insisted that its inability to comprehend the repeated abuse suffered by a woman—Molly Brown, in this case, the ex-wife of New York Giants kicker Josh Brown—wasn’t due to its own incompetence. After blaming the victim a few months ago, NFL leaders decided this time around to ...

Josh Brown Placed On Commissioner's Exempt List [Updates]

The NFL is suddenly very concerned about Giants kicker Josh Brown, now that the sheriff’s office in King County, Wash. has released documents in which Brown described in his own words how he abused his wife, Molly. The league was less concerned a month ago, when it suspended Brown one game despite t...

Please Arrest Whoever Did This To Fantasy Football

This is the worst thing I have ever seen:...

Ted Cruz Calls Colin Kaepernick A Spoiled Knucklehead

Ted Cruz, whose face is all moist surfaces and uncanny angles and about a third too much skin, will be remembered as the cuck who said to the American people, “Please elect the man who called my wife ugly and implied that my father murdered JFK as the next president of the United States. I’m a puddi...

BYU Commits Crime Against Football With Incredibly Futile Fake Punt

Almost had it fellas!...

BYU Pick-Six A Masterful Display Of Avoiding Tackles

Fred Warner picked off a Brett Rypien pass and returned it 59 yards to give BYU its first touchdown of the night against Boise State, and he did so with so much flair it required a lengthy replay review—one that, eventually, upheld the play....

The Steelers Want Ndamukong Suh Punished For Kicking Ben Roethlisberger<em></em> In The Knee

According to various sources, the Pittsburgh Steelers have asked the NFL league office to review a play from last Sunday’s game against the Miami Dolphins in which Ndamukong Suh appears to kick Ben Roethlisberger in the right knee....

Stephen Hauschka Has Been Letting People Spell His Name Wrong This Whole Time

For years, every football fan in America has been living in a world in which the Seattle Seahawks employ a kicker named Steven Hauschka. Today, we all discovered that Hauschka has been letting all of us live in a false reality....

Report: Eddie Lacy Fat Again

Packers running back Eddie Lacy’s weight is under constant scrutiny by both his coaches and the media, and head coach Mike McCarthy has publicly pleaded with Lacy to lose weight in the past. Things were looking good this offseason when Lacy reported to camp in shape, but he seems to have backslid th...