fr Page 236 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Scarlett Johansson Enters The Matrix: <em>Lucy</em>, Reviewed
1. Lucy posits that if a person were able to somehow assess 100 percent of his or her brain capacity, he or she would be able to travel through time, from the Big Bang to the dinosaurs to the dawn of man to the end of the world, and gather all the wisdom from millennia and hand it over as a gift to ...
Tour De France Rider Executes Perfect On-The-Bike Pee Break
This is a thing that distance bike riders do all the time, but rarely are we lucky enough to catch the magic that is the mid-race piss on camera. ...
Madison Bumgarner Can Dominate Without You Even Noticing
Last night's game between the Giants and Phillies was interrupted by a rain delay in the 4th inning that lasted nearly an hour. Under normal circumstances, this would have been a good time to just abandon watching the game altogether, but Madison Bumgarner was on the mound for the Giants, and that...
Tour de France Leader Shoulder-Swipes Dumb Fan's Cell Phone
This year's Tour de France has been filled with no shortage of crashes, some of which have been caused by stupid fans taking stupid selfies. But so far Vincenzo Nibali, the tour leader, has managed to avoid them. Until today....
Frank Caliendo Reads LeBron's Letter In Morgan Freeman's Voice
Frank Caliendo went on Mike & Mike today and read LeBron's essay announcing his return to Cleveland in the voice of Morgan Freeman. It's an excellent impression. Just make sure to close the video 24 seconds early so you don't have to hear Greeny and Golic. Like a cold bucket of water, those two. (Up...
Fred Davis Allegedly Criticizes Woman's Ass, Throws Dirt At Her
Former Skins tight end Fred Davis had a horrible February, but his year seems to be getting worse. A woman filed a complaint saying that on June 2, Davis harassed her while she was out with a friend at a diner. D.C. police now have a warrant out for him....
Jeff Francoeur's Teammates Prank Him, Again
Jeff Francoeur was called up the San Diego Padres today. Congrats, Frenchy! As he was making his way back to the bigs, though, his teammates revealed today that they had made him the victim of one more prank....
Seahawks Mascot Stutter-Steps, 49ers Fan Falls Like A Sack Of Potatoes
The bounce. The bounce is what makes this particularly humiliating for the San Francisco fan and absolutely wonderful for the rest of us. That it comes as he tries to adjust his pants while a furry mascot crosses him up is but a delicious, added bonus. ...
Smokin' Joe Frazier
From Philly.com, check out this article about Stephen Layne's dope Joe Frazier sculpture. ...
Boston Celtics Sign Evan Turner, Because Not Enough People Hated Them
After a season in which their bottomed-out squad of plucky nobodies occasionally showed admirable spunk under first-year coach Brad Stevens, the Boston Celtics evidently decided they'd had enough of this not-being-hated-by-literally-everyone crap, and went out and signed ball-pounding avatar of hope...
Dan Uggla Refuses To Go Quietly, Signs Minor League Deal With Giants
Dan Uggla's back, baby! Four days after being released by the Atlanta Braves, and just more than a week after being suspended (reportedly for showing up to a game at Wrigley Field just an hour before first pitch), Uggla is getting a minor league deal with the Giants, a well-known corpse repository/b...
Two-Tone Foreheads Are Back In Style
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Watch A Bunch Of Dumb Pandas Fall On Their Faces And Butts
We gave that dumbass goat a lot of grief for being stupid and uncoordinated, but we shouldn't lose sight of the fact that pandas are often clumsier than even the dumbest-ass goat. ...
Down Goes Terror: How A Frightened George Foreman Shocked Joe Frazier
Excerpted from Bouts of Mania: Ali, Frazier, and Foreman—and an America on the Ropes. ...
This Year, Everyone At The Tour De France Is Crashing Out
The opening stage of this year's Tour de France was a blatant attempt to get Mark Cavendish his first yellow jersey. Organizers kicked off the race with a pancake-flat run into Harrogate, UK, where Cavendish's mother is from. It's probably the only time the peloton's most accomplished sprinter will ...
Hey, go read a terrific examination of the Lance Stephenson problem, from Jack Hamilton over at Slate: "The sheen has once again come off Lance Stephenson, but the fact is that the sheen is always coming off Lance Stephenson—this is the perpetual state of the young man everyone wanted until they did...
The Tour De France Is Agony For The Spectators, Too
Whenever I hear hardcore cycling fans explain the Tour de France to novices, they seem to emphasize one aspect of the race—the suffering—above the rest. Sure, they talk about the sprints and the hills and the strategy, and explain how the cobbles of northern France, when wet, make the road as slippe...
Derek Jeter And Todd Frazier, Together Again After 16 Years
My jerk coworkers won't understand, but Derek Jeter does represent something to Yankee fans of a certain age. Like me! Over the course of his career, baseball players went from grown men I admired to people who are now younger than me. These two pictures, of Jeter posing with Reds 3B Todd Frazier 16...
Lance Stephenson Signs With Charlotte, And The East Gets More Fun
Former Pacers guard/wrestling heel Lance Stephenson signed a three-year, $27 million deal with the Charlotte Hornets early Wednesday morning, significantly weakening last year's No. 1 seed and making Charlotte a little more plucky....
God Bless...France?
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