g Page 5015 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Ex-Giant Brad Benson Is Greatest Ad Wizard Since Don Draper
Like many former athletes, New York Giant alumnus Brad Benson found a second career as a successful car dealer. Unlike most of them, however, he's made another name for himself as a filthy-minded, possibly unhinged radio pitchman....
Man Saves Beached Whale While Golfing, Avoids Obvious <i>Seinfeld</i> Quotes (UPDATE)
A golfer at Lighthouse Sound Golf Course in Maryland briefly interrupted his round to jump into the ocean and save a whale that was stranded. Unfortunately, that's a two-stroke penalty. (Sad update: The whale didn't survive.) [Independent Press]...
Men Who Look Like Old Lesbians: Will Leitch Edition
The floppy-haired hero from the hardscrabble streets of Mattoon, Ill. received a king's welcome at Busch Stadium and got the old pre-game treatment from the local Fox affiliate.For some reason he chose to wear Annie Leibovitz's eyeglasses....
Aww, Some Football Writers Apparently Want A PED Hysteria Of Their Own
"Memo to 18 AP voters who let Brian Cushing keep his award, despite clear PED use: you should be drug-tested yourselves," Sports Illustrated's Austin Murphy tweeted yesterday. "What a f'ing joke." Sigh....
TV People Confuse World Cup Host Country With Similarly Named Landmass
A reader sends this screengrab, from which we can deduce that either 1.) the poor kid doing the chyrons mixed up his large, Southern Hemispheric tracts of land or 2.) South Africa just won a war that no one knew about....
Bernie Carbo Tried To Have Keith Hernandez's Arms Broken
Carbo says he tried to pay "some people" $2000 to assault Hernandez, after he had implicated Carbo in his testimony in the Pittsburgh drug trials. Carbo says he's since forgiven him, so sleep easy, Keith. [Outside The Lines]...
Is The Best Buy Geek Squad Stealing Your Donkey Porn?
No time to waste. My hand hurts a lot from talking with my kid while using a cow puppet yesterday. I used the puppet for, like, an hour. Now I have carpal tunnel. Lamest injury ever? Lamest injury ever. Fucking cow puppet. Right to the letters:...
Join Us For A Live Chat With Doug Glanville Tomorrow At 2pm EDT
The baseball player who was smarter than you is now an author who is smarter than you. Glanville will be here tomorrow to discuss his new book, "The Game From Where I Stand," as well as other germane topics....
Last Night's Winner: Bob Bradley's Blamelessness
In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like Bob Bradley's exclusion of Charlie Davies from the World Cup roster, which, thanks to Davies's overly cautious Ligue 1 side, isn't Bradley's fault....
Bengie Molina's Outrage At ESPN Is Slowly Rounding Third
Molina has declared himself unamused by the SportsCenter clip you see here, in which the Giants catcher is lightly mocked for running from second to home like the QE2 steaming into port. This from a guy whose Wikipedia entry calls him slow....
Texas Fan Celebrates His New Souvenir With A Double-Barreled Salute
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Headlines That Get Funnier After Midnight: "Tiger Penis Found At Auckland Airport"
Not a surprise, really ... but how does that explain the neck problem? [Stuff.co.nz]...
Man Gets Hit By Car, Doesn't Drop Baby In His Arms
This incredible video shows Australian Andrew Leitch getting his legs crushed by a runaway car, but somehow holding on to his four-month son, who was completely unharmed. A few NFL teams could use a pair of hands like that. [CBS6/DailyIQ]...
Why Won't You Die, Montreal?
For the second time in two rounds, the eighth-seeded Canadiens have won a Game 7, on the road, knocking off both the President's Trophy winner and the defending champs. Obviously, we'll have to kill them in our dreams....
Stanford Guard Dismissed From Team After Golf Cart DUI
Fifth-year senior JJ Hones was arrested last week for "driving under the influence, reckless driving, evading a police officer and resisting arrest." Not bad considering her vehicle runs on batteries and easily tips over on fairways. [Fanhouse]...
World Cup Trash Talk Begins: Lionel Messi Is Coming For Your Women
We're about month away from the start of Soccerpocalypse 2010 and that means it's time for entire nations to start trading highly personal insults. Yes, even attempted seduction of another players ex-wife is fair game here....
Even More Pukey, Poopy, And Sexy Sorority Formal Action
Miami University's Alpha Xi Delta sorority has gotten themselves into some hot water of their own over their own outrageous, sex 'n' booze-infused soiree at the National Underground Railroad Freedom Center this past March. [Cincinnati.com, Homer247.com]...
Brian Cushing Can Keep His Crummy Award
The AP took its ridiculous revote, and 21 of 39 voters decided to feign outrage that the defensive ROY used a banned substance in a sport that'd look like Ultimate Frisbee if it weren't for "banned" substances. He's still ROY, though. [NYT]...
Greenmen <em>Still</em> Taunting Penalty-Box Prisoners
Prior to last night's Game 6 getting out of hand, penalty-boxed Blackhawks defenseman Duncan Keith was given the Jack Johnson treatment by Vancouver's most photogenic fans. Here's hoping they're roadtripping to San Jose right now. Photo via 30fps, H/T Tim....
Robinho And Pals Dance Merrily Along To Beyoncé
You know how sometimes on Jonathan Ross they will show a clip solely to embarrass a guest? Normally something humiliating from their past, like an old school play, or a silly advert? Good, you do. Well done....