g Page 5028 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Fans Oddly Excited To Meet Guy Impersonating Capitals Owner
Not happy with Washington's lackluster first round so far? Blame this guy who sort of looks like Ted Leonsis. [DC Sports Bog/Ted's Take]...

Roger Goodell Wins The Weekend
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the NFL's Judge Dredd, who can finally claim victory in his war to take back the NFL from scum and villainy (a.k.a. Ben Roethlisberger's wang.)...

It's Domestic Violence Night At Nationals Park
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogs to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Boston Fan Finally Picks A Winner
After a sweep three straight losses at the hands of Tampa Bay, the Red Sox fall into fourth in the AL East. The Boston media may be panicking, but at least one fan appears to have struck gold....

Here's Your Annual Wet USC Song Girls
An excellent palate-cleanser during the most jam-packed sports weekend in a while. The Song Girls hit the pool for a good cause (a charity, not your shameful urges). [BeatSC.com]...

BYU's Top Rusher Withdraws, Possibly Due To Premarital Sex With Girlfriend
Harvey Unga, BYU's leading rusher, is withdrawing from school. So is his girlfriend, basketball player Keilani Moeaki. They're leaving because of a violation of BYU's notoriously strict honor code. Let's speculate!...

Get Ready For The Worst Sports Show Ever
A helpful reader was trolling Craigslist when he stumbled across a casting call for a new sports/talk/comedy show. And man, does it sound terrible (and not just because Joumana Kidd is hosting)....

Ndamukong Suh Is A Pretty Alright Guy
Suh announced he'll donate $2.6 million to Nebraska once he signs an NFL contract. A little presumptuous to assume he'll even get drafted, don't you think? [Lincoln Journal Star]...

Strikeforce Post-Bout Brawl Is Childish, Exciting
Jake Shields was confronted during a post-fight interview by Jason "Mayhem" Miller demanding a rematch (Shields beat him in November). Because MMA wants to be the new boxing, their entourages got into it. Bonus: Gus Johnson gets righteous!...

Night On Ubaldo Mountain
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Orioles Combat Flagging Interest By...Turning Down Cal Ripken For A Job?
Your team's terrible. Your attendance is worse. What better way to add a little excitement than bringing your franchise's most beloved figure back under the O's umbrella? That's a rhetorical question, unless you're Peter Angelos....

Your NBA Playoffs Open Thread
Will Bulls-Cavs be half as good as Bulls-Celtics? Will the Atlanta Hawks learn to "Fear the Deer?" Can the Celtics shake off some half-season rust and stop Los Heat? Will the Nuggets rally in the name of their ailing coach?...

Willie Colon Had Enough Of Big Ben's "Sausage Party"
Colon said he felt women talking to him to get to Roethlisberger was "gay," and the male-to-female ratio at one club's VIP section was "a sausage party." Well, at least one of them managed to get some that night. [TSG]...

Stories That Don't Suck, With Special Guest Host
Today, our pal Alex Belth, proprietor of Bronx Banter, is taking the reins. He's selected four stories for your enjoyment....

ESPN.com Editors Can't Appreciate A Good Manly Kiss
It's not so much that the image on the front page of Soccernet is Gary Neville warmly congratulating Paul Scholes on his game-winner. It's more that the original filename was "nevillegay" (since been changed to "nevillekiss"). [ESPN.com]...

End Of The Line For The MSU Thong Thief
The Michigan State student who was arrested after stealing 79 pairs of women's panties denied that he has a sex addiction. It's clearly just a comfort thing, and makes him feel pretty. [AP]...

Commish Gives Salary Cap A Boost
David Stern has lifted the salary cap for next season to $56.1 million, roughly $4 million higher than expected. Great news for the Knicks, who can now afford Carlos Boozer, Ray Allen, and nice crutches for the both of them. [TrueHoop]...

Milledgeville Officer Said Woman Was Making Up Her Rape Accusation
The day before the investigative documents were released, the Milledgeville officer who took the alleged victim's statement resigned. We've got a pretty good idea why: he said she was lying....

Mascot Falls Off Dugout Roof, Thrills Hundreds
The Reno Aces are a Triple-A Diamondbacks affiliate. Why they have Grimace Jr. and a moonwalking wolf with a lack of spatial understanding for mascots is beyond me, but they sure can move. [Slanch Report, music via Technotronic]...

Victor Conte Leaks "Sugar" Shane Mosley PED Admission
Mosley is suing Conte because he claims he didn't know what was in those injections he was getting from BALCO. That's a little harder to believe after Conte blew up his spot by releasing video of Mosley's deposition....