g Page 5056 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

We Could Prevent Another Hank Gathers. Here's Why We Don't.
Nearing the 20th anniversary of Hank Gathers's death, it's fashionable to look back. But let's look forward. It's possible to save so many athletes from dying young, but it might not be worth the costs....

Strasburg Will Start The Season In The Minors For Reasons That Have Nothing At All To Do With Money, No Sir
It seems more and more likely that Stephen Strasburg will spend his April riding buses around the Carolina League, and this of course has everything to do with "his seasoning" and nothing whatsoever to do with saving money. Right....

Grizzlies Fan Enters The Pantheon Of Painful Trampoline Dunk Failures (UPDATE)
Last night, one lucky Memphis fan got the chance to dunk off of a trampoline. He managed the dunk itself, but what followed was yet another reminder of the perils of using springy devices to propel ourselves skyward. [NBA.com]...

Remembering Hank Gathers
Clay Travis has a nice tribute to Gathers on the 20th anniversary of his death and Loyola Marymount's unreal tournament run in his honor. It might get a little dusty wherever you're reading it. [Fanhouse]...

Purdue Pete's Child-Terrorizing Days Are Numbered
Purdue is redesigning their mascot, after many complaints about scared children. Not this li'l tyke, though; Purdue Pete swallowed him whole before he could register fear....

Jim Bunning Gives Reporter The Finger
It's easy to forget that Sen. Bunning, who enjoys watching the unemployed starve and freeze to death for sport, was a Hall of Fame pitcher. Maybe that's where he learned to deal so maturely with the media. [ABC News]...

Dissecting The Favre Ad, And The Fan Who Placed It
Well, we got our hands on the full-page ad one fan took out in the Hattiesburg American to implore Brett Favre to return (ginormous version below). And let me say, he is just the worst type of person....

Wizards, Donuts, Knives, And Cannibalistic Fruits
Boner from Growing Pains committed suicide last week, and that left me sad. More important, it made me remember that I used to watch that show religiously, and spent a great deal of my childhood imaging that I was Mike Seaver. There was one episode where Carol brings home some new friend: a smoking ...

John Daly's PGA Personnel File Is Appropriately Thick
Daly apparently got into enough trouble over the years that his file grew to 456 pages, which is less a personnel file than it is something Tolstoy might've written if Tolstoy had hung out at Hooter's. [Jacksonville.com]...

Indiana Hazing Scandal Proves High School Kids Are Still Obnoxious
Carmel High School's basketball Senior Day was ruined—ruined!—by shameless tabloid reporters snooping around in the stands for salacious gossip. Oh, and the fact that three of the four seniors were kicked off the team for alleged forceable sodomy....

Last Night's Winner: Jay Leno
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Lindsey Vonn, who continued her streak of tape delayed wipeouts by appearing as a guest on the new, new Tonight Show with....ugh, Jay Leno....

This Is Why Bobsledders Keep Their Heads Down
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Erin Andrews Becomes A Star Who Someone Will Dance With
"Dancing With The Stars" announced that its lineup for next season will include America's Sideline Princess, because apparently all you have to do is ask and they'll let you on. It's a pretty good system ABC's got going on there....

Media's Annual "A-Rod Is A Distraction" Story Arrives Early This Year
The feds want to chat with Alex Rodriguez about his connections to Tiger Woods's blood-spinning quack, Tony Galea. It's March 1, and The New York Times is already concern-trolling about "repeated distractions" from Rodriguez. Sigh. [NYT]...

Tim Tebow At The Combine: A Revelation, Set To Iron Maiden
As you know, Tebow impressed at the NFL Scouting Combine, running the three-cone drill in a hell-blazing 6.66 seconds. (It's the second coming! Of Mike Alstott!) Here's video of Tebow's big day, set to Iron Maiden's "Number of the Beast."...

A-HOLE BOSS DIGEST: Zap The Kids!
Welcome to Asshole Boss Digest, where we regale you Deadspin folk with stories of the meanest, cruelest, most batshit insane bosses, coaches, and teachers you ever had. Email me your asshole boss story here....

My Roger Ebert Story
The first time I was ever published in a book was 1997. It was because I'd found Roger Ebert's email and asked him a question....

Ian Poulter Misses Birdie, Aces The Bird
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Not A Good Time To Be A Beer Vendor At The Game
Perhaps as karmic payback for all those times they announce "last call" when they know damn well there's another hour of beer sales left, the weekend has seen a pair of disasters for beer vendors....

Tim Tebow False Messiah Watch: Antichrist Edition
With apologies to Slate, the Tim Tebow False Messiah Watch is our occasional look at the growing body of evidence - quotes, signs and wonders, excessively fawning prose - that the Florida quarterback is the Beast....