g Page 5091 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
When Mortal Kombat Meets Wall Street
The Shaolin Temple, birthplace of popularly known kung fu, is preparing an IPO. Shares pay dividends every time a little guy beats up five bikers in a bar. [Daily Telegraph]...
Tony Gonzalez's House Comes With Its Own Porsche
Crazy Uncle Tony's got a beachfront home, priced to move! These deals won't come around again, so act now! He'll even throw in a brand new Porsche! So do we have ourselves a deal, or what?...
Lowell's Bum Thumb Gives Thumbs Down To Texas Deal
Eleven days later, the deal's off. The upside of re-signing him after the 2007 season: keeping a World Series winning team together. The downside: it's Mike Lowell, and he was all but guaranteed to be physically untradeable. [Boston Herald]...
This Athlete Is Gay; You Got A Problem With That?
Rugby legend Gareth Thomas comes out of the closet, and everyone takes it in stride. Really, America? We're not as progressive as the Welsh? [Daily Mail]...
The Game Ball Goes To The Timekeeper
The clock inexplicably stops to give the home team extra time on their last possession. The refs huddle up and decide to end the game before the visitors can have theirs. You're damn right there's going to be controversy....
The Time Of Year When It's Okay To Bribe Student Athletes
Bowl season is upon us, with yesterday's New Mexico Bowl and St. Petersburg Bowl presented by Beef 'O' Brady's respectively. But these meaningless games are less interesting than the payment gift bags given to the players involved....
Which Former NBA Star Had An Affair With Some Guy Malcolm Gladwell Met At A Party?
And no, it is not the guy in the picture, I am fairly certain. But the beauty of Malcolm Gladwell is, I now know who Adonal Foyle is!...
Yes Virgins, Shaq Did Have Sexual Relations With Gilbert Arenas' "Baby Mamma." You Can Blame Feminism For That.
Last month, news reports began to surface that a centimillionaire professional athlete may have been unfaithful to his wife. Next someone's going to tell me Barney Frank is sodomist....
The Rich Eisen Problem
America is tired. We are, we're told, by the television, on the "wrong track." We are worried about debt. About our children. We worry, I think, most of all, about the NFL Network broadcasting important late-season games....
Zach Lund Is Not One Of Those Balding Dudes Who Shave Their Heads Because They Are Like, In Denial About The Bald Thing
Did you know propecia could be used to mask commonly exploited performance-enhancing drugs? But here's why (besides, like, duh?) to "just say no" to this "folly of follicles", courtesy top-ranked "skeleton racer" Zach Lund…...
Redskins Owner Surprisingly Tone Deaf on Issue of Racial Sensitivity
White guy Dan Snyder fired white guy Vinny Cerrato and immediately replaced him with white guy Bruce Allen, so that he can bring in either white guy Mike Shanahan or THIS (white) GUY Jon Gruden. Isn't there some rule...?...
Bears Grounded in Chicago
The Chicago Bears are unable to make it to Baltimore, because of the massive terrible snowstorm that literally everyone in the mid-Atlantic area is being a tremendous baby about....
Milton Bradley Will Now Be Mistreated By A New Fan Base
The Chicago sports media trade Milton Bradley to Seattle for the remains of Carlos Silva. Nick Johnson will compete for a spot on the Yankees' disabled list. Ladies and gentlemen, this is HOT FUCKING STOVE....
You Will Be Shocked To Learn The Lingerie Football League Is Not A Classy Operation (UPDATE)
The Smoking Gun has revealed the Lingerie Football League to be a cheap, exploitative outfit that behaves goonishly toward its own athletes, which is acceptable in America only if you're the NFL....
Gawker Media Seeks Brave Interns To Navigate Nasty Comments Section
Those of you out there with ninja aspirations at some of the other Gawker web properties may be interested in this opportunity. No sex required....
A New, Moderately Offensive Podcast Is Open For Business
Please go take a listen to the Spider And The Henchman show on Adam Carolla's podcast network. I'm honored I was picked to be their first guest. Topics of note: Tiger, Magic's HIV, and Eddie Murphy's tranny parties. Gurgle. [SpiderAndTheHenchman]...
The One With <em>Intense</em> Negotiations About Brett Favre's Butt Tattoo
We get a massive amount of tips in our inbox each week. Some are pretty interesting, but don't get published for one reason or another....
OK, Don't Blame Drew: ASU Coach Pat Murphy Was Forced Out Amid NCAA Allegations
The NCAA is accusing Arizona State's baseball program of nine violations, including the dreaded "lack of institutional control." Let's hope the NCAA's source is better than ours. [Arizona Republic, also]...
Time To Start Worrying About The Brains Of Hockey Players, If You Weren't Already
Reggie Fleming, a brawling defenseman from hockey's pre-helmet days, died recently at age 73 with the same sort of neurodegenerative disease found in boxers and football players. So now the NHL can pretend to address the issue, too!...