g Page 5108 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

No One Films The Belichick In Failure
The NFL Films cameraman gets taken down hard by one of the Dark Lord's minions (or his camera's cable), and Bill bids him a fond farewell. (Bonus animated gif, after the jump!)...

Pittsburgh Fandom Is A Very Sparkly Fandom
Do you know what a Blingee is? I hope not, because these obscenely garish animated gifs are only used by 13-year-old girls on their Geocities pages...or by Penguins fans. [DC Sports Bog]...

David Duval To Lose His Tour Card
There's a familiar face missing from the leaderboard on the final day of the last PGA Tour event of the season. The problem for Duval is that he's been missing from an awful lot of PGA weekends....

The TD Stands for Touchdown
The ex-CEO of TD Ameritrade wants to be a D1 football coach. I don't think any SEC coaches are willing to switch jobs with him, as being a Fortune 500 CEO would mean a pay cut for them. [Omaha World-Herald]...

All You Need To Know About Last Night's Fight
From the AP story: "Cotto's wife and child, who were at ringside, left after the ninth round, unable to watch the beating any longer." Cue Pretty Boy Floyd dodging a fight in 3, 2, 1... [AP]...

Poon For Everybody!
Missouri fans who made the trip to Manhattan, Kansas to watch their Tigers trash Kansas State 38-12 decided to honor the team's victory by holding up letters to spell out "POON." Although I'm a bit confused by the extraneous "O."...

This Guy Is Trying To Steal John Daly's Bit
And no, I'm not referring to Udorn Duangdecha getting his stomach stapled and surviving solely on Diet Coke and cigarettes - check out those slacks. Crap, they're so loud that Marlee Matlin heard him trying them on. [Devil Ball Golf]...

Your Late Afternoon College Football Viewing Open Thread
It's time for the second round of games on this wonderful Saturday afternoon. There's plenty of options on the telly, with Florida at South Carolina as perhaps the most intriguing. Can you imagine how excited these girls are right now?...

I Bet The Graphics Guy Who Cropped Indiana's Logo This Way Feels Like A Boob
Heh. Tit. And for those of you worried about this warping our young people, it has already been changed to a less-offensive image. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to make "BOOBLESS" appear on my calculator. (Thanks, reader Josh)...

CFL Player Gets Stabbed After Attending KISS Concert (Updated)
Calgary Stampeders tight end Teyo Johnson got stabbed at a party Thursday night after he went to a KISS concert. Apparently, it has been learned that it was a DJ Tiesto concert - not KISS. Same difference, right? [TSN]...

Chad Ochocinco Fined Veinte Mil Dólares By Liga Nacional de Fútbol Americano
¡Ay, caramba! Cincinnati Bengals wide receiver/prop comic Chad Ochocinco has been fined $20,000 by the NFL for jokingly attempting to bribe an official with a dollar bill during last Sunday's game against the Baltimore Ravens....

Rick Nash Is A Fancy Boy
I haven't seen a hockey player make a move this fabulous since D.B. Sweeney's one-footed salchow in The Cutting Edge....

And Now A Selection From Tim McCarver's "Great American Songbook" Remixed
During the MLB playoffs, Fox baseball analyst extraordinaire Tim McCarver released a CD of him crooning through jaunty Cole Porter-style songs without a smidge of irony. We had grand plans for this. Some fell through, but one miraculously worked out....

The Louts Will Rise Again
This swaying stereotype called Michael, apparently an Ole Miss frat creature, has some thoughts on that controversial "South will rise again" chant. It takes him precisely 10 seconds to say the magic phrase. Hint: It's not pro scientia et sapientia....

The One Where The Texas Rangers Inform Us Their Six-Shooters Are Not Whores
We get a massive amount of tips in our inbox each week. Some are pretty interesting, but don't get published for one reason or another....

LeBron James Pays Fitting Tribute To Jordan, Gives Fans New Overpriced Jersey To Buy
LeBron plans to surrender his No. 23 in MJ's honor. The real tribute here is less in the number change than in the shrewd business sense to introduce some No. 6 LeBron merch a month before Christmas....

Please Don't Mention Eggs To Mike McCarthy. Ever.
The Packers fired a 22-year Lambeau Field employee because coach Mike McCarthy thought he heard the guy tell him, "Don't lay an egg." That sounds about right. I wonder if the Metrodome is hiring? [Milwaukee Journal Sentinel]...

A Grim Look At Tim Tebow's Future?
Buried in a flimsy trend story about the, er....resurrection of "John 3:16" madness (courtesy of YouKnowWho, natch) is a more fascinating nugget about the true originator of the craze—who is serving three life terms in a California prison....

Bill Self Has A Discerning Eye For Talent, Ass
Self, on former Kansas big man Darnell Jackson: "I recruited Darnell because I liked his smile and he had a nice butt, to be honest with you." [KUsports.com, h/t Ryan C.]...

Algerian Soccer Team Did Not Sign Up For This
Check out this ridiculous footage of the Algerian bus under siege from rock-throwing Egyptian hooligans. Say....does anyone want my ticket for their World Cup qualifier this weekend? I suddenly have to be somewhere else. [Goal.com, DirtyTackle]...