g Page 5122 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Phillies-Dodgers Is Just Like Bloods-Crips, Insane Person Writes
Stu Bykofsky is the Philly Daily News' house lunatic who writes like he's corresponding from prison and who believes another 9/11 is just the thing to put some hair on America's chest. Care to hear his thoughts on Phillies-Dodgers?...

Cardinal Hoops Players Face Justice, Pitino Style
Louisville's Jerry Smith and Terrence Jennings were charged with misdemeanor counts of resisting law enforcement. Their coach says "it's serious" and they will be punished....just not in any way that involves playing time. Yes, that serious! [ESPN]...

Dittoheads Respond To Rush's Nixed NFL Bid With Sadness, Holocaust Poetry
"Tonight..." RedState's tsquare intones in a headline, "We Are All Rush Limbaugh." And then it gets so much better....

A Children's Treasury Of Rick Reilly®'s Heat-Related Similes
Rick Reilly®, who yesterday brought word that Colt McCoy's girlfriend is "hotter than shrimp vindaloo," has long shown a fondness for thermodynamic analogy. We've collected a few examples, with helpful visual accompaniment....

Former Penn State Player Suing School After Rape Charges Dropped
Two years ago, Penn State running back Austin Scott was arrested and kicked off the football team when he was accused of rape. Seven months later, the case was dropped, but not soon enough to save his NFL career. Oops!...

Fancy Lad Wows Hockey World With Whirlybird Goal
The highlight of the NHL season so far belongs to a nine-year-old showing off during some weird Mini Mite competition. He's already been added to the Maple Leafs roster. [Video below via NHL.tv]...

Mike Sims-Walker's Week 5 Status: Out-Nookie
Jacksonville wide receiver Mike Sims-Walker was deactivated for Sunday's game against Seattle, an absence that more deeply affected your fantasy league than the Jaguars, who lost 41-0. Why was he out? Why else? Coitus....

Oprah To Host Tyson-Holyfield III
Mike Tyson is heading back to Oprah Winfrey's show on Friday and he's bringing his old dinner companion, Evander Holyfield. What could those two possibly have to talk about? [CBSNews]...

Obama's Body Man Gets Bodied Up
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

More Commenting Changes Are Afoot: Wake Up And Read On...
Good morning, early risers/late night partiers. It's going to be a hectic, confusing day here at Deadspin (and most of Gawker media's sites) because, once again, they're dicking around with the comments recipe. Let's chop it up....

This Man Died 27 Points Too Early
An 89-year-old Lincoln man emerged from a coma to fulfill his last wish - to watch Nebraska play Missouri before dying. The worst part - he lost consciousness before NU's fourth quarter comeback. [World Herald]...

As If Skirt Chasing Wasn't Competitive Enough Already
A "5k race series bringing fitness, beer and flirting together," in which the women get a 3-minute head start and the men take off in pursuit, is called — yes, the SkirtChaser5K. Paging Jezebel. [RandBall]...

These Athletes Are Going To Hell
A fundamentalist Baptist church is making headlines for their upcoming book/album burning, but their website reveals a hidden treasure: the Index Of Ungodly Athletes....

Today In Binghamton Fallout
Binghamton has placed coach Kevin Broadus on a paid leave of absence, at last giving in to the widely held perception that Broadus had recruited the Hole-in-the-Wall Gang to the shores of the Susquehanna....

The Learning Curve: Brad's Beard's Blog
This segment is called "The Learning Curve" where you, young blog proprietor, will get a link to your new site on Deadspin. Any and all questions you may have about being a successful blogger will (hopefully) be answered....

BREAKING: Frog (Q-Dying)
The helmet-happy Frog, of our NFLHOTW series appears to be quite ill and unable to recreate football plays this week. Adjust your fantasy football animal rosters accordingly. Developing......

Rick Reilly®'s Hornball Simile Propels Colt McCoy's Girlfriend Into Momentary Google Fame (UPDATE)
Colt McCoy, Rick Reilly® writes, "has a girlfriend hotter than shrimp vindaloo, Rachel Glandorf." The first thing you'll notice is that he's analogizing a woman to Indian cuisine. The second: He names her, awkwardly. And now look what he's done......

Report: Limbaugh Dumped From Potential Rams Ownership Group
According to Adam Schefter, the investment group looking to buy the St. Louis Rams has decided that Rush Limbaugh's money is not worth his baggage and they plan to drop him from their ranks....

This Week In Heartbreaking High School Football Losses
The first one actually happened two weekends ago in Westland, Michigan, where John Glenn High (trailing by one after an earlier missed extra point) lined up for a final play, game-winning field goal against Canton Plymouth. Plymouth heroically blocked the kick and all its players ran to the sideline...