g Page 5205 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Albert Haynesworth Sued, But No Hard Feelings
The man injured in a car accident involving Albert Haynesworth is suing the Titans lineman for $7.5 million. "He's the man, but I'm still not mad. I don't have anything against him." [Tennessean]...

Walk Off Homer Disallowed By Premature Hand Slapping
It's one thing to be a stickler for the rules, it's another to be a stickler who protests a perfectly legit home run because of an obscure, pointless rule—and doesn't even read the rule right....

Catch A Ride On The Greinke Train
Look, we're all friends here. You've got certain feelings inside you and you're not sure how to deal with them, but it's okay to talk about it—you kinda want to hump Zack Greinke, don't you?...

A-Rod's Book Is No "Marley And Me"
According to one NY Post reporter who appears to have gone to exactly four bookstores in the Manhattan area, the sales of "The Many Lives Of Alex Rodriguez" are a little slow. [NYP]...

Alex and Sid's Dueling Hat Tricks
The NHL got what it wanted—a Crosby/Ovechkin playoff showdown—and the first two games have lived up to the billing. If only they can find a way to make it last longer than two more games....

Now, Is This Better Or Worse Than "Horry Kow?"
This shirt, worn at Busch Stadium by one cuddly Cardinal fan, was shown off proudly without security hassles. At least the fan with the "Cubs Suck" shirt was forced to turn his inside out. [JSF]...

Maybe The Magical Ponies Are Huge Miami Heat Fans
Courtesy of Runaround Sue's and around 50 other ESPN.com readers who spotted this poll. No, they weren't cornified again....

Carlos Zambrano Needs A Timeout
The Big Z is going on the 15-day DL with a bad hamstring. Should Cubs fans panic? Should they start beheading farm animals? Or get drunk and embrace the Jeff Samardzija Era. [Sun-Times]...

Malcolm Gladwell Wants To Know Why Your Team Doesn't Press More
There's a very lengthy article in The New Yorker this week, from uber-contrarian Malcolm Gladwell arguing that basketball teams should press more often, because it helps weak teams upset strong ones. (Except when it doesn't.)...

Sorry Ladies: Bruce Pearl Is Off The Market!
Hearts are a-breakin' all across the Smokies today as Bruce Pearl has announced that he's affianced to lady friend Brandy Miller. Do they sell creamsicle-colored tuxedo shirts? [Knoxville News Sentinel]...

Lance Armstrong's New Bike Insipred By Hope
Because it was designed by Obama poster artist Shepard Fairey. [AnimalNY]...

The Time Is Right For America's Baddest Horse Trainer
Ok, this has been bugging me since Saturday, so I have to ask—was trainer Bennie Woolley Jr. carrying a gun at the Kentucky Derby? (Probably not—but wouldn't it have been great if he had been?)...

Selena Roberts On Verge Of Becoming More Despised Than A-Rod
Selena Roberts' Alex Rodriguez tell-all finally hits the bookshelves today, but all the goodwill she received from her journalism colleagues after breaking the steroid story to end all steroid stories has completely vanished....

Austrian Hockey Players Will Question Your Sexuality In Perfect English
Austria lost to Denmark in a Hockey World Championship qualifier last week, but at least Oliver Setzinger got a chance to get to know his fans and their preferences for fellatio....

And The 2009 Brian Baldinger Award Goes To...Torry Holt
The former Rams' wide receiver instills confidence in his catching ability in front of a confused Jacksonville press corps. [With Leather]...

John Wall Declaring Early For Life Of Crime
Number One basketball super recruit John Wall has not yet decided what college he will pretend to get an education at for one semester, but perhaps he just needs trespassing time to think about it....

As Boston Globe Dies, One Boston Herald Columnist Reveals Himself To Be A Towering Douche
Regardless of any silly notions about Deadspin being anti-newspaper, it's unfathomable to think that many of our hometown papers we all grew up with could be obsolete in the next couple of years....

Even The Owner Of The New York Islanders Doesn't Like His Team
Nine years ago, businessman Charles Wang thought he would do Long Island a solid and buy their Islanders so the team could stay in Nassau County. Now? He kinda wishes he could have a do-over....

Don't Forget Your Daily Dose Of A-Rod Media Overkill
You think you're sick of hearing about A-Rod now? You haven't seen anything yet. Selena Roberts' book A-Rod is set to be released tomorrow and the media outrage machine is just getting warmed up....