g Page 5220 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Adrian Peterson Does Not Get Hockey
Like many a local celebrity before him, Adrian Peterson was given the honor kicking off the Minnesota Wild game last night with their traditional chant of "Let's Play Hockey." That didn't work out so well....

San Francisco Giants Advertising Copy Written By Giggling 12-Year-Olds
The Giants marketing department will apparently just write anything down on a piece of paper and consider their jobs done. Please leave all "ball"-based puns to the professionals. [Big League Stew]...

Do Not Cross The Hillsdale College Baseball Team
In a tradition as old as baseball itself, an editor who criticized the Hillsdale College (Mich.) baseball team's putrid record found his front porch decorated with dead animal carcasses, including a shotgunned goat....

It's Good To Be Bill Macdonald
Fox Sports West's Bill Macdonald has been a popular LA-based broadcaster for more than 20 years. Unfortunately, Halos Heaven ran some photos of him getting cozy with a young woman outside of Angels Stadium....

Tank Johnson Is Obviously Confident That He's A Changed Man
The former Bear/Cowboy/convict has just signed a one year deal with...the Cincinnati Bengals. [ESPN]...

NFL Prospects: If You Don't Want To Damage Your Draft Position, Keep Your Dirty Details Off The Internet
Here's a fascinating story from Yahoo!'s Charles Robinson about how some NFL teams create phony social networking accounts to do some clandestine character background checks of potential draft picks. This is what we hath wrought....

OK You Pissants, Make Way For Randy Johnson
There's been little wailing and no gnashing of teeth in the Bay Area over Tim Lincecum's underwhelming '09 debut on Tuesday. That's because A. The Giants won, and B. Their headliner is actually starting tonight....

Mike Florio Demands More Spanking In The NFL
It's Week 4 of the Deadcast, and we continue our extremely slow progress into something barely resembling a polished, professional broadcast. Helping the cause this week is our guest....

Rest Easy America, The Lance Armstong Bike Thieves Are Behind Bars
After an exhaustive manhunt, Sacramento police have captured the people they think stole Lance Armstrong's bike during practice runs for the Tour of California on Feb. 15. And one is named Dung Le. [ABCNews10]...

Skip Off The Pond, On To The Green, Nothing But Cup....
I wish there were a way to calculate the odds of anyone ever making this shot again. [Dogs Chasing Cars]...

I'm Beginning To Suspect That Canadians Drink Too Much Beer
If you were wondering why the Blue Jays drew only 16,790 against the Tigers on Tuesday, this may have something to do with it: The Rogers Centre banned alcohol for that game....

Tommy "The Hitman" Hearns Reduced To Fighting Chickens
Good job, Michigan State. Your failure to rescue the city of Detroit from financial ruin has forced a once great boxing champion to play tic-tac-toe against poultry for money. I hope you're happy....

John Calipari Continues His Dismantling Of Memphis
It was bad enough when John Calipari's daughter decided to follow her dad to the University of Kentucky, but it looks like Memphis isn't going to get to keep any of his players either....

That's One Way To Describe UNC's Dominance
"The Carolina lead mushroomed to 10 after 4:04. To 15 after 7:03. To 20 after 9:38. It was a seal clubbing..." [ESPN]...

I See No Negative Safety Implications Here
If there's one thing I'm sure of, it's that the new Indoor Football League is completely safe for both players and fans. But then I'm still holding on to Enron stock....

Martellus Bennett's Blog Is A Thing Of Beauty
Martellus Bennett (no relation) is best known for his fine performance on HBO's Hard Knocks and his ability to rhyme "Romo" with "homo." Now he's a blogger....and he is awesome at it....

Finally, A Video Game That Lets You Use Steroids
New online game from Addicting Games, Baseball Juiced, lets you roid up your players. The game is kind of crappy and doesn't seem to always work ... but maybe that's the point. [Badjocks.com]...

Connecticut Goes For Perfection Once Again
The UConn Lady Huskies go for broke tonight in the National Championship game. Win and they're immortal—lose and they're the biggest chumps of all time....

Blake Griffin Heading To NBA
Blake Griffin will get paid for his concussions from now on, thank you very much. (Also, joining him: Chase Budinger and Jodie Meeks.) Repeat after me: No Clippers, No Clippers, No Clippers, No Clippers. [AP]...