g Page 5231 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Armstrong Goes Down!
Lance Armstrong crashed on the first stage of a race in Spain today, and was taken to the hospital with a possible broken collarbone. What about the face? Did something happen to his face?! [Reuters]...

Who Knew Wrestling Could Be So Violent?
Iowa won the Division I wrestling championship yesterday, but not without a little drama, a little disappointment, and a little controversy. Oh, and a porn star....

A's, White Sox Honor Slain Oakland Policemen On Sunday
Ozzie Guillen: "It's a hard day for the Bay Area. If it's police or fireman or military and you take their life away because they're protecting our country, it's a sad thing." [San Francisco Chronicle]...

Curt Schilling Is Hanging Up His Bloody Sock Forever
Curt Schilling is retiring after 23 years of MLB service. There will be no comeback. His press conference, of course, was held on 38 Pitches. I'm skeptical. [Sox and Dawgs]...

The Case Of Thad Matta's Imaginary Son
You may have heard the shocking story of Thad Matta's trash-talking son, accused of slandering most of the greater Albany area last week. There's just one problem with this tale—Thad Matta doesn't have a son....

NFL Player Tries To Straighten Out His Woman With A Mop Handle
Oakland Raiders offensive lineman Cornell Green seems to have been upset with the mother of his two children over something. Sometimes it takes a little more to get a lady to just listen. [TBO]...

Happy Birthday, Sean Bradley
• And many more: A birthday tribute to human highlight reel Shawn Bradley. Yes, the reel is of other players' highlights, but he did make them possible. [Fourth and Fail]...

Jets Want Some Of That Jay Cutler Goodness
The Jets are reportedly very interested in trading for Denver's laser-armed crybaby. What, no confidence in Kellen Clemens and Brett Ratliff? Preposterous! [NYDN]...

God Just Didn't Let Him Know How To Beat Arizona
"God sent Moses to free Israel. God sent Gary Waters to resurrect Cleveland State. I really believe that. I believe that 100 percent. [Yahoo!Sports]...

Michael Jordan's Son Leads Team to Illinois High School State Championship
Watching his boy Marcus dominate from his spot in the stands, His Airness was reportedly quite misty-eyed. Maybe he was embarrassed by the Kurt Rambis prescription specs?...

TaylorMade Offers World's Safest Promotion
TaylorMade and Golfsmith.com will refund the cost of your driver if El Nino wins at Augusta. They will also buy you a house if John Daly is ever elected Senator....

A-Rod Dated Famous 'Spitzer Gate' Madam
The New York Daily News is reporting that Kristin Davis provided the Yankees slugger with both hookers and personal companionship. He...definitely has a type....

Gonzaga Alumni Are Weeping With Joy
Demetri Goodson's thrilling end-to-end bank-in with 0.9 seconds left lifts the Bulldogs over Western Kentucky. If Gonzaga isn't careful, it's going to develop a reputation for these....

You Know It Is Spring When the Birds Have Returned
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

You Have No One To Blame But Yourself, Young Man
Deadspin Albany operative Daniel reports that these signs were hanging all over town yesterday. No wonder Siena was so fired up against OSU; they had had ENOUGH of Thad Matta's son badmouthing upstate New York....

NCAA Tournament - Round Two, Evening Games
What to watch while planning your family vacation to beautiful downtown Baghdad......

President Clinton Will Hedge His NCAA Bets, Thank You
It's now been well established that President Obama likes college basketball. But did you know former President Bill Clinton likes hoops, too? It's true, and Clinton would like to share his picks with you, kinda....

Out-Of-Control Striping Costs High School Basketball Team Shot At State Title; Paul Lukas Explodes
North Lawndale College Prep can't catch a break. Just this season, they've had players shot, academically ineligible and accused of cheating, and now they've lost a state semifinal game because of a uniform stripe. Cripes!...

NCAA Second Round, Second Round
Let's hope these next games are better than the Villanova-Duke UCLA* suckfest in Philly. Jay Bilas called that "men against boys", and while that seems a little like piling on, he'll hear no argument here....

Baseball Has Been Very Good To Him Indeed
And now the bittersweet story of minor-league catcher Brayan Pena, who defected from Cuba 10 years ago by jumping out a bathroom window in Caracas, only to end up with the Royals....