g Page 5263 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Wait! Where's Everybody Going?!
Lion attack! Quarterback Kevin Newsome and kicker Anthony Fera decommit from Michigan and agree to play for Penn State. [The 700 Level]...

Breakfast Fail: Intrepid Reporter Attempts To Eat Five Denny's Grand Slams
Remember the Denny's Super Bowl ad that promised free breakfast to everyone in America? Two million were served on Tuesday between 6 a.m. and 2 p.m., including five to one Chicago Tribune reporter alone....

The One That Critiques Little Billy Belichick's Make Out Technique
We get a massive amount of tips in our inbox each week. Some are pretty interesting, but don't get published for one reason or another. (NSFW)...

Girls Behaving Badly: Our Ladies Take On The M.O.B.
It's Waxing Off, the feature that restored your faith in mankind by helping you to find the true meaning of Christmas. This week, rowdy female Knicks fans and the men who love them....

The Rangers Attempt To Reacquire Stars' Sloppy Seconds
Sean Avery could be a Ranger again soon, according to the New York Post. The exiled Stars' defenseman, who pisses off everyone in the NHL, is currently reconditioning his head for a comeback....

UPDATE: Subway Banishes Phelps From Its Home Page (Jared Still Available)
The week just keeps getting worse for Michael Phelps. USA Swimming suspended him for three months on Thursday, and now Subway has apparently become the second sponsor to let him go. That's BOGUS, man!...

How Is This A Good Choice Of Face Paint? I Mean, Honestly
From Wednesday night's game between Oklahoma State and Texas Tech at Gallagher-Iba Arena. Third row of the student section reserved for Spanish fans? [APIAS]...

That Naked Man Outside Your Hotel Room Door May Be Terry Glenn
Terry Glenn arrested for marijuana possession after wandering naked in an Irving, Texas hotel. One question: Where was he carrying the weed?...

You Can Almost Smell The LA Looks In This Photograph
• The Evolution of Pro Bowl cheerleaders: The 90's were not a great period for pom-pom ladies. [FanIQ]...

Donuts, Is There Anything You Can't Do?
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]....

Tony The Tiger First To Jump Ship
Kellogg's will not extend contract with Michael Phelps; Subway also mulls divorce. [Advertising Age]...

Peyton Audibles To Jay Cutler's Attempted Murder
• Horseplay: Manning grabs Jay Cutler's cellphone before Pro Bowl pranksters throw him in the pool; forgets the insulin monitor in Jay's other pocket. He should be out of the coma by June. [With Leather]...

"Jockeys" Will Teach You Thing Or Two About ... Jockeys
Jockeys are short little people with high voices that everyone makes fun of because they ride ponies for a living, but let me tell you something, brother—these guys (and gals) are complete badasses....

Jake Rosholt Is Heavily Armed, Has Beer-Fetching Dog
If I were Jake Rosholt, I wouldn't much care if I won my UFC Ultimate Fight Night 17 bout with Alessio Sakara on Saturday. After all, I've got a beer-fetching dog!...

James Harrison's $800,000 Touchdown
Poker player Phil Ivey bet $800,000 on the Cardinals +3.5 for the first half of Super Bowl XLIII. I believe that is what's known as a "bad beat." [Phil Ivey Rules?]...

When You Play South Alabama, You Better Bring A Monitor
Look....all South Alabama coach Ronnie Arrow wants is a replay review of the last-second shot that just sunk his team, and if he doesn't get it then he just might murder your face....

A Cherished Preakness Tradition Is No More
The Maryland Jockey Club is ending the long-standing tradition of spectators bringing their own beer onto the infield at the Preakness Stakes. We like to think we had something to do with that....

Lane Kiffin: Urban Meyer Cheats (And Not Very Well) (Update)
If Lane Kiffin wants to revive Tennessee's rivalry with Florida, stealing two committed players on Signing Day and then publicly accusing the Gators of a recruiting violation is a good way to start....

ESPN Employees Will Pitch In To Help
Last week we showed ESPN president George Bodenheimer's gloomy report about the state of the WWL, which detailed the many changes needed in order for the company to continue making jizzillions of dollars....

So Did Dre Kirkpatrick Just Sign With The Atlanta Braves?
National Signing Day jumps the shark on Wednesday as Gadsden High cornerback Dre Kirkpatrick plays Three-Card Monte with caps from Texas, Alabama and ... the Braves?...