g Page 5268 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Apparently, Ray Emery Doesn't Like Hats
I don’t know if a hat killed former Ottawa goaltender Ray Emery’s father or if they just make his head scratchy, but if you ask him to wear one he will straight up murder you....
Derek Jeter Takes What He Wants, When He Wants It
• Guilty as charged: Derek Jeter stole this sign from the old Yankee Stadium, but that's nothing compared to the time he stole my heart! [New Stadium Insider]...
Kris Letang Beats Off Two Guys, Interviewer Takes Notice
Fox Sports' Dan Potash asks an unfortunate question of Pittsburgh Penguin Kris Letang. It's funny because your mind is in the gutter. [YouTube, via The PensBlog]...
Who's Sorry Now? (Martellus Bennett Rap Fail Edition)
The Cowboys' Martellus Bennett is sorry for that earlier rap, when he rhymed "Romo" with "homo." Precisely $22,000 worth of sorry. So he'd like to make it up to you with ... another rap....
Top Ten Reasons Rahal-Letterman Won't Be Racing The IndyCar Series This Year
1.) They don't have a sponsor. 2.) They don't have a driver. Actually, that's pretty much all an Indy Racing team needs, so I guess they're screwed with or without the other eight. [AutoWeek]...
Larry Fitzgerald Sr. And Rick Reilly Both Thank Slate Writer For Punchbowl Turd
Fitzgerald Sr.: "Negatives come from haters. They can believe in whatever they want to believe in." Reilly: "Looks like someone just got a new search button and decided to use it." [CNBC]...
Super Bowl Sub-Plot #6: Larry Effin' Fitzgerald
There are several key storylines that will be beaten into the ground by everyone who covers the Super Bowl over the next week. We will beat them down even further....
Roger Clemens Will Be Ready To Pitch...Right After His Sadomasochistic Rubdown
New excerpts from Torre's "The Yankee Years" (insert Tom Verducci yelling "It's not a memoir!" right here) have surfaced. One anecdote tells us how Roger Clemens achieved that anguished look on his face while he pitched....
Andy Roddick Fails To Solve The Puzzle That Is Roger Federer
Andy Roddick adopted a strict new workout regimen, shedding 15 pounds so he could move quicker and last longer in the blistering Australian heat. It worked—but it still wasn't enough....
This Is Your Brain. This Is Your Brain On Football
A couple days ago, more definitive evidence that the professional helmet-smashing lifespan of an NFL player has detrimental effects on the human brain. It still probably won't change the way the game is played....
That's Some Mighty Fine Police Work There, Lou
Police in Chicopee, Mass., say they have finally captured the man responsible for a string of area bank robberies conducted while wearing the new Boston Red Sox 'hanging sox' cap. [Red Sox Monster]...
Feds Say They Have The Smoking Gun, Er, Urine Sample, In Bonds Perjury Case
You thought that you were in the clear on this steroids thing, Barry, but like all criminals, you made one key mistake. You peed in a cup....
Georgia Fires Dennis Felton
The Bulldogs have lost seven in a row and are 0-5 in the SEC, so head coach Dennis Felton is being shown the door. He might need help walking through it, though. [WSBTV]...
Duke Snaps Under The Pressure Of Being Top Dog
For the third week in a row, the No. 1 team in the country loses, but at least this time they lost to the previous No. 1. So I guess we'll never settle this thing....
Mario Chalmers Still Learning This Whole "Tee Vee" Thing
Awwww: Ahh, the Puppy Bowl... keeping moms interested in Super Bowl Sunday since 2005. [Hot Dog and Friends]...
It's War, And The Fish Are Winning
From the folks who brought you Flying Fish Jumps Into Man's Eye and Another Teenager Attacked By Fish, it's Leaping Needlefish Impales Man's Nasal Cavity. This was no boating accident! [Practical Fishkeeping]...
Meanwhile, At Busch Stadium ...
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
The Rise And Fall Of A South Florida Basketball Legend
Edwin Rios, once considered a "can't miss" prospect for the University of Miami, arrested Wednesday on burglary charges. [Fourth And Fail]...
Tom Penders Accuses ESPN Of Video Witchcraft, Not Returning Calls
OK, you recall how Houston's Aubrey Coleman used Chase Budinger's face as a doormat on Sunday. Coleman was ejected and then suspended, but that's not the end of our story....