g Page 5299 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Did Visanthe Shiancoe Flash On Purpose? One Ex-NFLer Thinks It's Possible
Regardless of what Visanthe Shiancoe told Minnesota gossip columnist "CJ" after he found out his dangling member was revealed to the world, Shiancoe's agent, Tony Agnone, says the Vikings tight end was "sorry it got on television." The damage-controlling Agnone also said Shiancoe's greatest concern ...

Non-Nude Attorney Updates Us On Nude High School Cheerleader Story
Further details in the Bothell High (Seattle area) nude cheerleader case, because I know that you're concerned. The attorney for the two girls, who were suspended for texting nude photos of themselves to the football team, appeared on a local television show this morning. And it wasn't a cooking seg...

Chicago Cubs Become Pawn In Most Obvious Corruption Scandal Ever
This just in—Illinois politicians are kinda corrupt. As you may have heard, Governor Rod Blagojevich (henceforth known as "Blago") was arrested by FBI agents on federal corruption charges, after he "put a for sale sign" on the appointment of the new Senator to replace President-Elect Barack Obama. H...

USC Wins Hypothetical Playoff According To Vegas Odds
Leave it to Las Vegas to sate all our needs. Even those we didn't know we had before. (I'm looking at you midget escort service.) Everyone knows that the idea of a playoff is so awfully complicated that it would require a Manhattan Project-level commitment before anything could happen. Or, you know...

Star-Tribune Columnist: Ask Not For Whom The Dong Tolls
The Minneapolis Star-Tribune writer who scored an interview with Visanthe Shiancoe on Monday was pretty much just covering her beat, as it turns out. Meet C.J., gossip columnist and unofficial nudity reporter, who happened to see Shiancoe exit a limousine at Trocaderos Restaurant, and got the first ...

High School Running Back Has Trouble Finding The End Zone (Literally)
Whose idea was it to paint the lines on a football field white? Did they realize that when it snows—as it often does during important late fall playoff games—it's impossible to see where you are on the field? That's why T.J. Peeler of Broad Run High School just assumed he had already reached the end...

Help Give West Virginia A New State Motto
On Saturday Bill Stewart provided what I thought was the finest ending to a college football press conference ever, with his poetic, somewhat cracked and nonsensical ode to the state of West Virginia. So in his honor, let's compose a new motto for his state in the comments. I know you can probably d...

The PLAYOFF Buzzsaw That Is The Arizona Cardinals
Of all the pictures taken during The Buzzsaw That Is The Arizona Cardinals' NFC West-clinching "win" over the St. Louis Rams on Sunday, that one there is my favorite. It is somehow perfect that, when the Arizona Cardinals won their first division championship since 1975 (the year I was born!), the ...

If A Game Lasts Longer Than Four Hours, Please Consult Your Doctor
A reader writes: "Hey guys, So I hate to have to play the "penis" card here, but somebody down in North Carolina needs to be admonished for selecting a logo with some very Freudian undertones."...

Antonio Bryant's Left Hand Can Snatch Eagles From The Sky
The Deadspin Morning Video Wake Up Call will return for a brief period of time through the holidays. If you have any suggested videos to fill this space, email us. Subject: Morning Video Wake Up Call....

It's Giant Balls Vs. Dwight Schrute For Hearts And Minds On Super Bowl Sunday
In a bold frontal attack that makes Pickett's charge look like a game of Red Rover and the Normandy Invasion seem like a visit from the grandparents, ABC will storm NBC's programming fortress on Super Bowl Sunday with the intent of stealing ever viewer possible. Their weapon? The obstacle course she...

Morning Blogdome: Maybe Next Year We'll Be Solvent
• Plus, you have to live in Chicago: You know your franchise has had problems when going bankrupt barely cracks the list of bad times. [In Game Now]...

Hey Steve, Have This Souvenir Cup!
The fans in Carolina are so polite. After sitting through an exciting Monday Night Football game and then being forced to do a lengthy SportsCenter wrap up, Steve Young was clearly too busy to run to the concession stand and get a tasty soda. So some helpful Panther backer decided to gently toss his...

Hmm, I Just Know That They're Up To Something ...
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Jeff Garcia Awaits Your Scrutiny In The Comments
I've been a fan of Jeff Garcia since his little 2006 playoff run with the Eagles and will continue to be one until he finally, mercifully retires. He's not the flashiest guy, wasn't blessed with a big arm, and is particularly unimposing when he's photographed in black and white with freckle-splashed...

Gator Fan Threatened With Gun
"A 51-year-old woman yelling "Go Gators" during Florida's victory over Alabama in the Southeastern Conference championship game had a gun pointed at her by a convicted felon who entered her apartment after he misunderstood the cheering for racial slurs." Sounds like justifiable homicide to me. [Dumb...

It Goes To Eleven ...
Well, that was fast. The Tribune Company files for Chapter 11 bankruptcy, but the Cubs — whom they're hoping to sell by early April — aren't included in the filing. [Market Watch]...

Rinku And Dinesh Are Not On The Babewatch!
Our Baseball Yatra is fast becoming one of my favorite baseball blogs. It chronicles the adventures of Rinku Singh and Dinesh Kumar Patel, the pair of teenagers from India who won a pitching contest in their native country and ended up signing pro contracts with the Pittsburgh Pirates. In today's ep...

To Watch Tonight
Watch to watch while find your own damn TV listings ......

Afternoon Blogdome: David Garrard Is Invited To My Wedding
• That is a sweaty, sweaty man: I'm not sure if this is a wedding or a Chippendale's show, but either way ... David Garrard ... I want to party with you, cowboy. [Brahsome]...