g Page 5500 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
When Canadians Visit Phoenix
• Roberto Luongo dances rather well to Elton John songs. [Orland Kurtenblog] • Pete Carroll fears nothing. Not even you. [Super Punch] • Perhaps Mike Lupica is the real host of "Sports Reporters." [The Big Lead] • UConn basketball, ain't what she used to be, ain't what she used to be, ain't what she...
Bears Upset Packers, Their Quarterback Sort Of Helped
A cursory look at the 1 o'clock games led one to make a face comparable to sniffing a plate of expired deli meat. But sometimes expired meat is salvageable, which led to the creation of the hot dog. Similarly, this bundle of games gave us a couple of surprises....
It's December 23. Nobody's reading this. So let's take this time to congratulate Canadian curler Kevin Martin and his team on winning The National curling tournament this afternoon, giving him five straight curling Grand Slam titles. See what happens the weekend before Christmas? Curling updates fin...
West Virginians Should Get Out Of The Conspiracy Theory Business
There's been a wave of sympathy for Michigan in the past year, and I for one hoped they were going to find a good solid coach from the lower ranks to bring up, like Ohio State did with Jim Tressel. That didn't happen, and my sympathy swung to West Virginia for losing their fabled coach Rich Rodrigue...
Speeding Tennis Balls To The Nads Are Painful, Scientists Confirm
The now-swollen man named Jason Fields did this in the name of science, which was curious how the heart rate changes while anticipating a frozen rope to the sack. Suffice to say, we need to bump Fields to the absolute top of the national list of people who are in desperate need of being donated a bl...
Downsizing Impacts Everything, Even Closers
Due to budgetary setbacks, today's NHL Closer and ... um, whatever the hell we were calling the college basketball thing will share a post. We apologize for the inconvenience, and we fought this thing as far as we could before we thought a Photoshop of a basketball and a hockey puck would look reall...
Brigham Da Noise, Brigham Da Funk
We've been fortunate so far that most of the bowl games have given us actual watchable football. Sure, while many of the games are devoid of tradition ("New Mexico! It's ... culture!") but so what? The way the bowl system is set up, fans normally bludgeoned with story after story of Tim Tebow and Le...
About Last Night...
What you missed while publicly executing Santa Claus... • NFL: Matt Moore was disrupted by printouts of ... your mom. Cowboys escape Carolina with a 20-13 win. • NCAA Football: Best two out of three then? BYU avenges regular season loss to UCLA in the Las Vegas Bowl. • NCAA Basketball: Oregon loses ...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while finding alternate uses for your excess candy canes... • 5:00 p.m. — New Mexico Bowl: Nevada vs. New Mexico; 8:00 p.m. — Pioneer Las Vegas Bowl: BYU vs. UCLA. Wait, no non-sports-related sponsorship tie-in to the New Mexico Bowl? Not Interested. [ESPN] • 4:30 p.m. — College Basket...
A total of 36 players will not travel with Florida State to the Music City Bowl for one reason or another. (Another reason being: mass suspension.) What might really help out the Seminoles would be to ask the refs if they could play most of the game 7-on-7. Failing that, change your confidence ratin...
Alex Legion Gets His Exodus After All
In our ongoing coverage of the dogmatic inevitability that Alex Legion will lead Kentucky to the Final Four, a tranquil atmosphere casts over the tumultuous world of college basketball....
Let's Take Off This Mask And See Who You REALLY Are
Congratulations to photographer Chris Detrick, who offers up a strong 11th hour entry into Most Disturbing Sports Photo Of The Year. The guy getting his eyes plucked out is BYU's Jonathan Tavernari. The poker is Jason Walberg. Oddly enough, there was no foul on this play, and Tavernari seems to have...
Piledriving Political Correctness
• Wrestling is a fantastic breeding ground for stereotypes. [Food Court Lunch] • Give Howard Schnellenberger more publicity, stat. [The Legend of Cecilio Guante] • Japan hits college basketball. [Storming The Floor] • Thursday essentially rocked for Pittsburgh sports fans. [Mondesi's House] • Josh H...
Kirk Radomski Is In Your Extended Network
This analysis of the names in the Mitchell Report? Yeah, we're not done with it yet. Slate compiled a nifty little web graph — an "interweb," if you will — of how the players heard about the butt-needling services of one Kirk Radomski. It's color coded and everything....
They Don't Snowboard In Bikinis, So Ratings Suffer
• 12 noon — NCAA Basketball: Georgetown at Memphis [ESPN] • 1:00 p.m. — Papajohns.com Bowl: Southern Miss vs. Cincinnati [ESPN2] • 1:00 p.m. — Movie: Planes, Trains And Automobiles [Comedy] • 2:00 p.m. — NCAA Basketball: UCLA at Michigan [CBS] • 2:30 p.m. — Movie: Goodfellas [Spike] • 3:00 p.m. — NC...
Mustaches Amplify Sadness
When you see Stan Van Gundy all pissed off on the TV, you have to go through a lot of mental logic to remember which team he coaches right now. Miami? Yeah, they're bad so that would make sense, but ... wait, no. Houston? I think so... oh, wrong Van Gundy. Cleveland? Does he coach Cleveland? Well, n...
About Last Night...
What you missed while explaining the jerkoff motion to your co-workers... • NCAA Football: SCHNELL! SCHNELL! Florida Atlantic quickly builds a football program and wins a bowl game. • NHL: Pssh. Ancient Chinese secret. Calgary falls to Dallas in overtime. • NBA: Portland's win streak is at 10, they'...
Cultural Oddsmaker: III
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday ... well, the next two Fridays, anyway. Yes, after more than a year of goodness, Mr. Daulerio is retiring the Cultural Oddsmaker column at the beginning of 2008. There are now THREE left. Email him to let him know how much you'll miss him. Happy Fri...