g Page 5547 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
R.I.P. Bill Wirtz
They say that no one on their deathbed ever says, "I wish I would have worked more" — other than Jack Donaghy, anyway — but one wonders if, ultimately, former Blackhawks owner Bill Wirtz, who died this morning at the age of 77, would have secretly smiled to learn that the first line in his obit invo...
Looking Fate In The Eye And Scoffing
A Cubs fan sent this picture to us this morning: It's the Cubs World Series tickets, for Games 3 and 4. It's September 26. The Cubs' magic number remains four. And look: Cubs World Series tickets. Their existence mocks the natural order of the universe. And just looking at them is probably making m...
Every Day Is Father's Day For Prince Fielder
If neither the awesome might of the robotic 12-person beer bong nor the motivational power of free rectal exams are enough to help the Brewers catch the Cubs in the NL Central, then perhaps Prince Fielder's red-hot animosity toward his father is. Fielder The Younger hit home runs No. 49 and 50 on Tu...
About Last Night
What you missed while being pantsed by an ape ... • MLB: Phillies decide against a frontal assault, decide to sneak up on NL wild-card berth from the rear. • NFL: Brian Griese takes the reigns as Bears' starting quarterback, and this time he shall not fail!* • Soccer: Hey look, European soccer score...
It's Furries Vs. Klingons For All The (Lost) Marbles
Man, oh man, how we wish we were in Atlanta this weekend. It's the Furries vs. Klingons bowl-off. If there's anybody out that way who wants to pop by and let us know how this goes, consider yourself officially encouraged. We only wish Bob Uecker were around for it; Furry conventions are never the s...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as the lesbian Brady Bunch rumors are shot down ... • MLB: Cubs at Marlins. Division title, come to Papa. [WCIU] • MLB: Padres at Giants. What else could possibly go wrong? [Channel 4 Padres] • Movie: Rocky II. Yo Adrian! I did it! [Versus]...
You're Responsible For The Death Of Tradition
We have not played golf in five years; we pretty much only play at bachelor parties, which is why people always make fun of us at bachelor parties. (This is not the only reason.) But when we do play, we're Charles Bronson in The Great Escape: We're digging tunnels....
There's Only One Answer To The Bears' QB Problem
After Sexy Rexy Grossman's third consecutive — or fourth, or fifth, or whatever — horrific appearance last week, Bears fans are screaming for backup Brian Griese. But let's not forget: He's got plenty of baggage himself....
How Not To Text Message
The couple in this picture is ... hmm ... let's see ... "Simone Callahan" and "Shane Warne." He's apparently one of the best cricket players in the world. She's his wife. Well, for now anyway....
Rocky Mountain Low
• When did the Broncos start to stink at home? [BroncoTalk] • A new social community for sports pros, and what not. [Access Athletes] • One of those lousy sports weekends. [And Here Come The Pretzels] • A comprehensive look at the Donovan McNabb situation. [The Starting Five] • Those pretty Getty Im...
How To Bring Your Car Back From The Pound
Not much is worse than having your car towed. We once had our old Toyota Camry towed in St. Louis, and we had to take a cab to a lot in which — and we don't want to overstate this — Beezlebub himself required us to give him 200 bucks in cash. Our keys were covered in sulfur. It's not a fun place to ...
Joba Is The New F—k Lion
By now, you've probably seen these photos of various New York Yankees rookies dressing up like characters from The Wizard Of Oz. We definitely enjoy Joba Chamberlain's impersonation of a f—k lion....
We Have To Ask
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 11 a.m. Fantasy sports with Nate Ravitz: Nate Ravitz, Nate Ravitz make me a match, find me a find, catch me a catch/Nate Ravitz, Nate Ravitz look in your book, and make me a perfect maaaatch ... • 2 p.m. Ex-Yankees outfielder Mickey Ri...
OSU Phenoms Love To Make New Friends
When you're a young, flashy, super phenom freshman quarterback, you have all kinds of opportunities to impress your coaches. You can put it extra time at practice. You can spend your school hours studying game film. You can run extra sprints. The world is at your disposal; you never get a second cha...
Love (And The NL Wild Card) Is A Battlefield
This photo is from Sunday, but it tells you all you need to know about the Padres right now. Milton Bradley being helped off the field, his season ended due to injury after a run-in with an umpire. San Diego had already lost center fielder Mike Cameron to an injury, meaning that two-thirds of their...
About Last Night
What you missed while driving the real Batmobile ... • NFL: The Saints are 0-3, but you can't beat this gumbo. Tennessee 31, New Orleans 14. • MLB: Brewers decide that three games out of first with six to play is a good time to make their move. Milwaukee 13, St. Louis 5. • Cricket: Of all the champi...
MNF Heads Back To New Orleans
We suspect that tonight's "Monday Night Football" telecast from the Superdome will have the electricity and emotion of last year's MNF game, if just because we don't think Bono's gonna make the trip this year. (However: "Cowboy Mouth" will be in the house!_...