g Page 5615 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chattters ... • Noon. NBA with David Thorpe: Is it ironic that people are more interested in the lottery than in the actual games? • 2 p.m.. Baseball America's Jim Callis: Is that a resin bag in your pants or are you just glad to see me? • 4 p.m.. AF...

Elijah Dukes Is Not Subtle About Voice Mail
Tampa Bay Devil Rays outfielder Elijah Dukes is off to a splendid start this year, and just watching him play, you can tell he has superstar potential. Hell ... he could very well be the next Brett Myers!...

Yet Another Great Reason To Live In Portland
Before we talk about the disappointment of all the teams who didn't win the first or second pick in last night's NBA Draft Lottery, let's look at the team that did win, the Portland Trail Blazers. (The official favorite team of Henry Abbott at True Hoop, who was at the lottery last night and, amusin...

About Last Night ...
What you missed while decorating your tree fort ... • NBA: If the Spurs keep playing this well, they may sell out a game. San Antonio 105, Jazz 96. • MLB: Griffey's 573rd career homer can't stop the tempest that is the Washington Nationals. • NHL: Daffy is going nuts, Donald is passed out in a corne...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while hiding from the flying robot police ... • MLB: New York Mets at Atlanta. The most humid rivalry in sports. [TBS] • NBA: Draft lottery, at Secaucus, N.J.; Western Conference finals, Utah at San Antonio, Game 2. You know which one you care about watching more. [ESPN] • NHL: Western...

How To Make Love To That Team's Biggest Fan
In one of those perfect ideas that make the Internets such a blessing on our daily lives, Every Day Should Be Saturday and Ladies ... have come up a guide to seducing a particular team's fan. Want to know how to bed that Cardinals fan? What do you say to a Knicks fan to sneak 'em in the sack? How do...

Andy Roddick Is Not That Jacked Up
Last week, TMZ pointed out that the new cover of Men's Fitness featured a suspiciously pumped-up Andy Roddick. Well, Roddick himself has chimed in, in that wonderful English we've come to love and expect from our professional tennis players....

A-Rod Digs Deep Within
We were at the Yankees-Red Sox game last night, and noticed something that, finally, someone has clearly pointed out: Alex Rodriguez fiddles with his cup more than anyone else in baseball....

JoePa Will Put Your Ass To Work
We love Joe Paterno. Whereas many coaches would discipline their players for a campus fight by suspending them or — more likely — not doing anything at all, the Penn State legend is forcing them to clean the inside of the stadium....

Quite A Big Game Tomorrow (Now THERE'S A Headline!)
• Previewing the Champions League final. [That's On Point] • The Yankees are trying to distract you. [Rumors And Rants] • Imagining a Jazz-Suns Game 1. [Bright Side Of The Sun] • The Rob Deer school of hitting. [Bugs And Cranks] • Legitimate reasons to hate the Spurs. [The Realests] • The Capitals, ...

You Dissed Kenny! You Bastards!
The "political" blog Newsbusters has been watching SportsCenter lately, and the folks there are calling shenanigans on tanned, nimble-footed ESPN personality Kenny Mayne. The site puts it thusly:...

Ken Griffey Jr. Should Be A Billionaire By Now
A sun-splashed Saturday afternoon, on a Little League Field somewhere in America:...

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 11:15 a.m. Baseball with Joe Morgan: How about, just once, cooking with Joe Morgan? • 1:30 p.m. SC Special, Draft Lottery: We assume this is the NBA Draft, because the alternative is too scary to contemplate. • 2 p.m. NASCAR with Terry...

Oh, Yeah, He Just Remembered
Every time someone has something new to sell, particularly a book, they need to come up with some sort of revelation, a hook, something no one has ever heard before. (For ours, we're going to confess that we're actually bald.) And sometimes they might need to make it up. We're just saying....

About Last Night ...
What you missed while fighting right down to the last jibe ... • NBA: June rapidly approaches, and we still have four teams left ... Pistons take Game 1 over Cavaliers, 79-76. • MLB: Wang, Rodriguez lead Yankees to 6-2 win ov ... wait, what? Yankees beat Red Sox? • MLB: How long will it take for the...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch WATCHING JOHN RAMBO... • AFL: New Orleans at Philadelphia. Much, much better than the lawnmower races. [ESPN2] • MLB: Boston at New York Yankees. Some sort of rivalry exists, we read somewhere. [ESPN] • NBA: Eastern Conference finals, Cleveland at Detroit, Game 1. This just in: LeBron ...

Someone In Oklahoma Is Sad
The great folks at Post Secret — via Burnt Orange Nation — have dug up this little mailing, which features a sad, scorned lover of an Oklahoma football player lamenting the need for their union to remain a secret. Oklahoma last won a national championship in 2000, which theoretically narrows it down...

Italy Is Gaining On Us? Inconceivable!
One thing we know about yacht racing: When you change your dock-out song and still lose, it was not meant to be. For the first time in 24 years, there will be no U.S. team in the Louis Vuitton Cup final. Luna Rossa of Italy beat the Americans to clinch the best-of-nine semifinals, 5-1. Yes, we have ...

Welcome, Jezebel: Turn To The Worship Of Her God Baal
The classy, bombastic lovely ladies seen here are the editors of the newest site from our benevolent benefactors at Gawker Media, Jezebel, which launched today. The basic premise of the site is mapped out in a manifesto about the five biggest lies that women's magazines spew. Personally, we've alway...

Fun With Ambidexterity: It's Pat!
A while back we told you about Creighton's Pat Venditte, whose main claim to fame — besides being a college junior who looks like he's 12 — is that he can pitch with both hands. OK, perhaps not that impressive when you put him next to the Amazing Rubber Boy, but we have trouble picking up a fork lef...