g Page 5731 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Clinton Portis Hangs Up The Wacky Glasses
There's a reason that you must wait five years until after your career is over to be elected to most professional sports Halls of Fame; it looks strange to have a Hall of Famer out there running around like everybody else. It seems beneath them, somehow....
To Watch Tonight
What to watch after another fun-filled day of Squirrel Awareness Week activities ... • Boxing: Lightweights, Carlos Hernandez vs. Kevin Kelley, at San Antonio. This should be ... wait a minute. Versus? Wha? [Versus] • College football: Brigham Young at TCU [Versus], Auburn at South Carolina. Keep an...
Oh, No, Mike Tyson's Back! What Ever Will We Do!
You know, now that Mike Tyson has announced that he's going to be doing a travelling roadshow of "fights," we know that we're supposed to get all huffy about it, say things like "When's this guy gonna learn?" and "What has happened to boxing?" or even the old standby "Why doesn't he move on with h...
This Is Why They Should Make Protective Cups For Your Ears
We're not sure what compelled ESPN to give us a random story about a high school player whose head was being eaten from the inside out by a nasty beetle, but, honestly, we're pretty glad they did....
![Hey, Did Somebody [Cramp] In Here?](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/18f47w4gdsv3vjpg.jpg)
Hey, Did Somebody [Cramp] In Here?
Just to make sure we remain the gutter-obsessed sewer rats we are, it's time for some fart humor....
Still Wading In The T.O. Morass
You know, it's strange how, after the frenzy of Terrell Owens-related madness yesterday, it all seems to have died down today. It never fails to bewilder us that once an athlete denies something, mainstream reporters just kind of say, "OK, well, must not be true, then!" and move on. There seems to b...
Blogdome: Southern Comforts
• The top five silliest SEC traditions. So many to choose from! [Loser With Socks] • NBA Live 07 is out, and look what they've done with Mr. Balkman. [Bench Renaldo] • Don't worry, Mets fans: Don't worry. [A World Of Logical Consequences] • Is it time for Benson in Chicago? [Ron Karkovice Fan Club] ...
It Don't Mean A Thing If It Don't Have That Ring
Ever wonder why Sheryl Swoopes was a successful athlete but, say, Kordell Stewart was not? According to a study by King's College London — whatever that is — it's because women with long fingers make better athletes than women with shorter fingers....
"Thick In The Britches"
This is Bob Whitfield, veteran left tackle for the New York Giants. According to his bio, he has five children, ages ranging from 19 to 5. He seems like an upstanding member of society. And when NJ.com asked him, apropos of nothing, "whose backfield would you like to see in motion?" he had quite an ...
You Can Lean On Him
So yesterday, it came out that San Diego Chargers safety Terrence Kiel was arrested by the DEA for shipping codeine-based cough syrup to Texas. The substance, which mixed with "either soft drinks or drugs" (two entities we wouldn't imagine to be so easily interchangable), creates something called "l...
Jesus Has Nothing On Mike Holmgren
Lost in all the Terrell Owens madness yesterday was the strange, theologically earth-shattering news that Seahawks running back Shaun Alexander proclaimed he would play next week, despite his broken foot, because of the power of prayer....
I Can't Believe It's Not Butter
We mentioned this briefly the other day, but we figure it probably deserves its own post....
We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 10 a.m. The Morning Buzz: Oh, so that's what that means. • Noon Boxing historian Bert Sugar: Does it really take a boxing historian to deduce how this is going to turn out? • 2 p.m. MLS with Jimmy Conrad: Can we get the Superfans in he...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while gently, delicately rocking ... • MLB: Pedro Martinez gets final tuneup before playoffs and ... uh oh, ... Braves beat Mets 13-1. • Tennis: Venus is back! Let us rejoice. • Soccer: Didier Drogba, hat trick, Chelsea over Levski Sofia 3-1 ... ring a bell?...
The Human Being Vs. The Publicist
A legitimate question as we tie a big ribbon on this whole Terrell Owens suicide business for the day, which, we have to say, ESPN has done a rather outstanding — if predictably overdone — job of covering today:...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you recall that mini-tornado that hit Busch Stadium a while back, which turned out to be an ill wind ineed ... • MLB: Philadelphia at Washington. Eye of the Tiger? Anyone? [ESPN] • Soccer: UEFA Champions League, Werder Bremen at Barcelona, at Bremen, Germany. So, is this a current m...
Maybe The BALCO Reporters SHOULD Go To Jail?
As we sort through the public reaction to the possibility of "Game Of Shadows" reporters Mark Fainaru-Wada and Lance Williams heading to jail for their refusal to give up their sources, we have found something surprising: The vast majority of people we talk to about this who aren't reporters think t...
A Jersey For Very Tiny, Annoying Humans
If you want your T.O. live press conference updates — and boy, DON'T YOU — you can find them right here....
"When She Said She Was Gonna, Like, Wreck My Car ... I Didn't Know What To Do"
From Australia comes the heartening news that, even if the worst happens, Barbaro's racing career is not necessarily over if he happens to croak. The AP reports: ...
Five Tiny Tidbits On: The Los Angeles Lakers
It's hard to believe, but the NBA season is just around the corner. Let us celebrate with five tiny tidbits on each team. Tomorrow we begin with the Central Division, so do us a favor and send us your tips at [email protected]. • 1. We're Still Looking For Lakes In Los Angeles. The Lakers did not g...