g Page 5777 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Just Another Manic Monday
Before the week runs its course and we head into our pleasant weekend of barbecues and hangovers, we just wanted to once again salute the genius of CLEVELAND'S INVESTIGATIVE REPORTER Carl Monday, who continues to blow the lid of the cottage "jerking off in a library to get away from one's terrifyi...
What Being "Put Out To Stud" Can Really Mean
As recovering horse Barbaro continues to rake in the get-well cards and well-wishes from somewhat bewildering "fans," we take a moment to look at what being "put out to stud" really means. If Barbaro does survive all this, we all have an image of Barbaro spending his golden years humping around, b...
Blogdome: Don't Eat That Hot Dog!
• Two men, driving through Texas, going to baseball games and eating hot dogs with ink on them. [The Mickey Rivers Experience] • Why Albert Pujols will break the home run record. [U.S.S. Mariner] • Well, this is one way to support the Mavericks. [Mavs Playoff Blog] • Robert Evans reviews "Year Of ...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while hanging upside down above a trampoline ... • NBA Playoffs: The Pistons we know and love are back, blowing sweet kisses to Shaq and the Heat ... • NHL Playoffs: The Ducks are not done! They need a couple more hours in the oven before the Oilers are ready to dig in. • MLB: Becket...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch after your Minuteman border activities net exactly one rabbit and old boots ... • MLB: Tampa Bay at Boston. Because Your Sports Leader cannot seem to get enough of the Red Sox. [ESPN] • NBA Playoffs: Conference finals, Game 2, Miami at Detroit. If you watch one NBA playoff game all sea...
The Most Brilliant Thing You'll See All Day
So a local television station in Cleveland decided to put together an "investigative report" on the dangers of allowing your children to go to the public library....
Blogdome: A New Position In The NBA
• That's what each NBA team needs: A designated nut-kicker. [Johnny Hong Kong] • This is not — repeat, NOT — how you play trampoline basketball. [Insomniac's Lounge] • Cole Hamels already has himself a famous girlfriend. [Paul's Poop] • Your source for all your hating Jay Mariotti needs. [We Are The...
Letters To Barbaro
As BarbaroMania sweeps the nation like a crazy horse tsunami, we pause to pay tribute to our army of commenters, who were in top form on Wednesday. Your messages to Barbaro were, um, at once inspiring and disturbing: "Get up. WE'RE RUNNING OUT OF TIME. — Jack Bauer, 35; Los Angeles, CA, USA, soon ...
Searching For SpongeBob
If the movies have taught us anything, it's that Alcatraz is escape-proof. That's because of the frigid, shark-infested mile-and-a-half of San Francisco Bay that's between the notorious former federal prison and the city of San Francisco. If you're a 1940s goon, hood, mobster, mug, ruffian, thug, ...
We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 2 p.m.. Rapids' Jovan Kirovski: A soccer star in Colorado; your life must be exactly like Mick Jagger's. • 2 p.m. NBA with Chris Broussard: Who's the next coach for the Kings? Are you thinking what I'm thinking? Exactly; Tom Tolbert. •...
Hey, It Worked In The Warriors
Our affection for Cincinnati wide receiver Chad Johnson is well-documented, so we're obviously down right giddy to see that, in the offseason, Johnson has, inexplicably, decided to grow a mohawk....
You Know Schilling Plays Against Himself As Soon As The Game's Over
As you might have heard already, Red Sox legend/blowhard Curt Schilling loves video games so much that he had a video character of himself created for the game Everquest II. (Photo from Boston Dirt Dogs. If you defeat him, Sony donates money to the ALS foundation....
About Last Night ...
What you missed while emptying the dishwasher and finding the Holy Grail ... • NBA Playoffs: The Sun Also Rises. Diaw's 34 lead Suns to 1-0 advantage over Mavericks. • NHL Playoffs: Sabres strike back, take 2-1 series lead over Global Warming-Induced Weather System. • MLB: Don't look now, but the Do...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you admire your white knit collar polo with two button placket, just like ESPN's Jay Harris ... • MLB: New York Yankees at Boston [ESPN], Atlanta at San Diego. Has there ever been a streakier team than the Padres, in any sport? [TBS]. • NBA Playoffs: Conference finals, Game 1, Phoen...
You Don't Bring Me Apples, Anymore ...
OK, we'll admit it; we wrote a letter to Barbaro. Dear Babs: Get well soon, you big, crazy ungulate mammal. Sorry you got hurt, and also for breeding you with legs like chopsticks. Our bad. Well, see ya. Yeah, like you haven't written. Sure. Have you seen New Bolton Center, the hospital in Kennett...
Blogdome: Goleo Brings The Funk
• Goleo, the late World Cup mascot, gets his rap on. [I Dislike Your Favorite Team] • Introducing the St. Louis Cardinals fan half beard. [Inside STL] • Is someone going to have to intervene in this Ozzie Smith-Tony LaRussa feud? [Sports. Music. Blog.] • The NFL is costing itself a lot of money with...
ESPN Bonds Chroniclers About To Be Released Into The Wild
We would say our long national nightmare is almost over, but we have a feeling the nightmare was only in our heads all along....
We Mean Not To Offend, Joey
Now ... we are going to tread very carefully here ... we don't want any trouble ... we are just reporting facts ......
We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 1 p.m.. Baseball Blunders w/Rob Neyer: Would writing angry Amazon reviews count as a "blunder?" • 3 p.m. College football w/Beano Cook: When we heard that line on the Sopranos this past Sunday, "Someone should tell her she's dead," we ...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while telling everyone you meet "you're no Jack Kennedy." ... • NBA Playoffs: Introducing Antoine Walker, Gary Payton and Jason Williams; remember them? Heat beat Pistons to take Game 1. • Soccer: Well, this can't bode well. U.S. loses to Morocco 1-0, plus Claudio Reyna strains hamst...