gi Page 488 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Marlins Have Become The (Original) Kings Of Comedy
The Miami Marlins are 1-3 so far in their dream season. They'd be fifth in the NL East if not for the fact that an NL East team (Atlanta) had to play the New York JuggerMets and consequently didn't win a game. Their manager offended, like, half of Miami. Someone's squatting on their domain name. The...

Someone Should Just Blow Up The Orlando Magic At This Point
In the ongoing Dwight Howard-Stan Van Gundy bitchfest, there is only one true solution: just get rid of everyone. Trade Howard. Fire Van Gundy and general manager Otis Smith. Then sell the team. Until then Orlando will have a superstar who does not want to be there being coached by a coach who does...

How The Masters Theme Song Came To Be: An Interview With The Third Cousin Of Kenny Loggins
On the 14th hole at Augusta, with the breeze blowing through the trees, musician Dave Loggins had his inspiration. It was April 1981, his first trip to the Masters. His friend Ken Chance, an attorney, had scored passes, and they were walking the course. They paused at 14, and lyrics popped into Lo...

Your '90s High School Movie Cast Power Rankings
American Reunion comes out today, and I'll confess to liking it a bit more than Grierson does. I agree that these characters aren't close to interesting enough to justify four movies, but I can't help but admire the simply, ingenious premise: Just turn it into a high school reunion. It's a bit baffl...

Augusta Has Become Impossible Over The Years: A Pretty Graphic Explaining The Design Changes
Co. Design has as their infographic of the day a sharp poster explaining how Augusta has changed since the first Masters in 1934. So verdant! [Co. Design]...

This Is What Happens When You Accuse A Notre Dame Football Player Of Sexually Assaulting You
Last week, the National Catholic Reporter published a lengthy piece on reported sexual assaults at Notre Dame. Its fulcrum is the case involving Lizzy Seeberg, a 19-year-old freshman at nearby St. Mary's College who committed suicide in September 2010, just 10 days after she was allegedly sexually a...

Dodgers Owner Magic Johnson Is Not Thrilled About His Opening Day Seats
Guess you can't tell which one of these gentlemen just made an almost-$1 billion profit by selling a baseball team, and which one just saw his Cy Young Award-winning ace leave the game with the flu....

Stan Van Gundy Sets Up Dwight Howard For The Most Awkward Interview Ever
According to the Orlando Sentinel, Stan Van Gundy has heard, from "people in our management right from the top," that Dwight Howard has requested that he be fired. The video above picks up Van Gundy's comments just as he utters them. At the 2:50 mark, Van Gundy is approached by Howard, who is not ...

10 Historical Events That Would've Been Completed In The Interval Between MLB's First And Last Opening Days This Year
1. Anglo-Zanzibar War (38 minutes) 2. Death and resurrection of Jesus (according to Bible) (36 hours) 3. October Revolution (2 days) 4. Bay of Pigs Invasion (3 days) 5. Operation Desert Fox (4 days) 6. The ground conflict of the Gulf War (4 days) 7. February Revolution (5 days) 8. Six-Day War (6 day...

Joey Votto's New Contract Is Like A Mortgage-Backed Security
Reds first baseman Joey Votto officially signed a big contract extension today. A big, honking deal: 10 years, $225 million, on top of the two years and $26 million the Reds already promised him for 2012 and 2013. There's an option year for 2024....

Robert Griffin III Celebrates His Last Winning Moment In A Long Time
We're not really sure why RGIII got to climb the ladder to cut the nets after Baylor's women's basketball team beat Notre Dame in last night's NCAA title game. Must have been the important role he played in the Lady Bears' victory....

Joe DiMaggio's Corpse Has Endorsed A Candidate For Broward County Sheriff
Joe DiMaggio has been dead for 13 years and thinks you should elect Louie Granteed to be Broward County's sheriff. Actually, Granteed got the endorsement of Morris Engelberg, DiMaggio's lawyer and confidante and guy who's been making money off the DiMaggio estate for years. But as the executor of th...

Bruce Pearl’s First Con, And The World That Created A Monster (Deadspin Classic)
Over the weekend, one long-running college basketball feud came to a quiet and friendly conclusion: Jimmy Collins, a former Illinois assistant, finally received an apology from Bruce Pearl, the disgraced former Tennessee coach. As an Iowa assistant in 1989, Pearl had accused Collins of offering mone...

Ty Lawson's Crossover Dribble Literally Busted Ryan Anderson's Ankle
It's generally the go-to descriptor for an effective crossover dribble: "He broke the defender's ankles." Usually, this is a considerable exaggeration—but don't tell Magic forward Ryan Anderson that, because his ankle rolled over like a Suzuki Samurai while trying to guard Ty Lawson late in last ni...

Ryan Anderson's Miss At The Buzzer Was Worthy Of His Facepalm Reaction
Not to take anything away from Dirk Nowitzki's game-winning basket, but the 5.9 seconds remaining were enough for Orlando to get off not one but two final shots in an attempt to tie the 100-98 Mavericks lead. The second of these—an awkward scoop at the buzzer from under the rim—didn't fall for Ryan...

When Does Major League Baseball Season Begin?
When is Opening Day? Did you know it already happened? This week, the Mariners and Athletics split a two-game series in the Tokyo Dome. Kids in Oakland and Seattle rushed home from school to watch them from 2 to 5 a.m....

Conclude March Madness By Reviewing The Best Sports GIFs Ever
The incomparable Jon Bois has spent all March encouraging participation in his GIF brackets. Voting irregularity has marred the final—which includes the bad boy pictured here—but that doesn't mean you shouldn't relive the looped images we cherish. [SBNation]...

High School Girl Charged With Assault After Brutal Soccer Beatdown
Throw out the formalities when Lewisville and Chester get together, that's what I always say. The South Carolina schools met for a women's soccer match Monday evening, and it ended with the police being called. That New Mexico-BYU game has nothing on this one....

Meet Bruce Lee, The San Francisco Giants' Red-Tailed Secret Weapon
Anyone who has ever attended a game at San Francisco's AT&T Park knows that it's one of the jewels of the MLB stadium circuit, except for one teensy problem: THE HORRIFIC TRASH-EATING BIRDS THAT COME OUT AT NIGHT AND STEAL YOUR $7 GARLIC FRIES....

The Knicks Blew Out The Magic, But The Bigger Surprise Is That Glen Davis Didn't Eat This Knish
New York stomped Orlando 108-86 last night in a game that was less close than even that score indicates. But lost in the narrative is a single moment that speaks volumes about love, betrayal, and an uneaten knish....