gi Page 570 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Antonio Pierce Has Got Those Hands That Feel
The Deadspin Morning Video Wake Up Call needs your help. If you have any suggested videos to fill this space, email us. Subject: Morning Video Wake Up Call....
T.O. Scolds Media, Ed Werder Following Spanking Of Giants. Let's Watch The Fun
Here's Terrell Owens doing what he does best, denying controversy that he's supposed to have started. In this case, the jaunty jalopy cap adds a special air of believability, wouldn't you say?...
Battle Tonight In Dallas
Yeah, I'm pretty sure the ref walked away from this fall with a broken nose....
Why Doesn't Reggie Bush Get Any Respect? (It's Not The Hamsters)
ESPN's big Alaskan sled dog of a football analyst Mark "Stink" Schlereth was summoned to critique the performances after Thursday night's New Orleans Saints/Chicago Bears game. One player who didn't impress him? Reggie Bush....
So That's What The Kneepads Are For
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
Help Give West Virginia A New State Motto
On Saturday Bill Stewart provided what I thought was the finest ending to a college football press conference ever, with his poetic, somewhat cracked and nonsensical ode to the state of West Virginia. So in his honor, let's compose a new motto for his state in the comments. I know you can probably d...
Now This Is The Way To End A Press Conference
One might say that Bill Stewart is heavily invested in the state of West Virginia: Not only does he coach the Mountaineers, but he was born and raised there. The following video doesn't quite rise to the level of a Jimmy Patsos email, but it's head-scratchingly wonderful nonetheless....
Visanthe Shiancoe Becomes A Big, Bright, Shining Star
For the second Sunday this season I received a text message regarding an unlucky football player's unleashed member. Granted, KOGOD's "Locker room cock pic. Any thoughts?" message was less frantic than poor Tanner Cooley's after his brother's unfortunate slip-out, but it was still memorable in the s...
America's Most Distracted Team Still Wins NFC East
Somehow this loss is all Antonio Pierce's fault. But even though the Giants were pushed around by the revitalized Iggles, they were still NFC East champions at the end of the day. The best highlight from yesterday's 20-14 loss from a Giants perspective was Tom Coughlin's joyous sprint down the sidel...
How Great Was That Play? So Great I Could Punch My Coach In The Face!
BeamerBall had a new wrinkle installed before its clash with Boston College in the ACC Championship yesterday. Anytime Virginia Tech comes up with a big play, someone walks up next to Coach Beamer and knocks him upside the head. Must've worked, as the Hokies took care of business yesterday and walke...
At Illinois, No Jock Left Behind
Here is stately Wayne Manor The Irwin Academic Services Center at the University of Illinois. Here, Illini students can use computer labs and classrooms, schedule sessions with tutors and special counselors, and even relax in oversize leather chairs and gaze at expensive oriental rugs. Wait … you’re...
OK Baby Mangino; Prepare For The Terrible Retribution Of Baby JoePa
As Baby Mangino stomps through the SHOTY competition leaving terror and thousands of empty Gerber jars in his wake, many were beginning to doubt that anything could stop him. We were looking for a hero, and now, at the 11th hour, we may have found one. Indroducing Baby JoePa, who, like the original,...
Sean Avery Apologizes For Trying to Make the NHL Interesting
Sean Avery's getting a lot of crap (and a four game suspension) for his "sloppy seconds" interview, but he's finally caved in and issued a formal apology for his comments. Dallas Observer blog "Unfair Park" got it up early last night:...
Greg Robinson Reads Children's Classics
You've gotta feel for Greg Robinson. He seems like a nice enough guy, and by all accounts he's a decent coach. His heart's in the right place, and all that. But if you ever wanted a more vivid picture of what the strain of coaching a major college football team is like, take a look at the video belo...
Colbert: It's High Time The Government Stays Out Of Our Sweatpants
If you think you've considered all angles of the Plaxico Burress story, think again. Stephen Colbert provides food for thought in this segment from Tuesday's Colbert Report, in which he asks the perfectly reasonable question, why should a consensual act between a man and his semiautomatic Glock hand...
When What To My Wondering Eyes Should Appear, But Baby Mangino, And Eight Tiny Reindeer
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
Plaxico Burress Suspended For The Rest Of The Season
The New York Giants waited until the very end of the day to announce that Plaxico Burress will in fact be placed on the "non-football injury list." This is effectively a suspension that removes him from the Giants roster for the remainder of the regular season and the playoffs, and (unlike injured r...
Jon Stewart Reports That Sweatpants Do Not Make A Good Holster
I'm a little surprised that The Daily Show didn't break in with weekend coverage of the Plaxico Burress story; the whole thing seems cobbled by comedy elves just for Jon Stewart. Finally on Monday he was able to jump on it, and while not as good as Dash's efforts on this story, Stewart did not disap...
Breaking!: Plaxico Burress May Have A Sore Leg
An urgent SportsCenter update has just informed the world that Plaxico Burress showed up to work today, less than 24 hours after facing the horrors of central booking at the One Seven. The notorious skel (hey, I've seen NYPD Blue) reported to the Giants training facility this morning, per team rules...
Baby Mangino May Be An Unstoppable Force
If you haven't seen the current results of the SHOTY voting so far, it appears that the cherubic, fake-mustachioed visage of bouncy Baby Mangino will be tough to beat in this year's field. He's currently waxing Brett Favre with 86% of the vote. Even though Favre's tumultuous year has made him a legi...