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It Is The Warriors' Sacred Duty To Orbital Strike The Celtics Into Hell Tonight
It’s been rough going for the poor Boston Celtics lately. They’ve lost five of six since the break, they’ve made no headway in their pursuit of a top-four seed in the playoffs, and they got absolutely walloped at home by James Harden and the Houston Rockets two nights ago. Perhaps even more ominousl...


Report: Warriors Plan To Add Ancient Pizzagater Andrew Bogut
The Golden State Warriors are planning to sign 34-year-old center Andrew Bogut for the remainder of the season, according to a Yahoo Sports report citing anonymous league sources. Bogut, who left the NBA when the Lakers waived him last February, has been playing professionally in Australia since Apr...

Report: Warriors Plan To Add Ancient Pizzagater Andrew Bogut
The Golden State Warriors are planning to sign 34-year-old center Andrew Bogut for the remainder of the season, according to a Yahoo Sports report citing anonymous league sources. Bogut, who left the NBA when the Lakers waived him last February, has been playing professionally in Australia since Apr...

Robert Sarver Filled His GM's Office With Goats, Who Then Filled His GM's Office With Goat Shit
The last decade of Phoenix Suns basketball under owner Robert Sarver has been absolute shit, and there are no signs that it’ll get better sometime soon. Over at ESPN, Kevin Arnovitz has a long and depressing read for any Suns fan, one that focuses mainly on the failures and mistakes of the team’s o...

Robert Sarver Filled His GM's Office With Goats, Who Then Filled His GM's Office With Goat Shit
The last decade of Phoenix Suns basketball under owner Robert Sarver has been absolute shit, and there are no signs that it’ll get better sometime soon. Over at ESPN, Kevin Arnovitz has a long and depressing read for any Suns fan, one that focuses mainly on the failures and mistakes of the team’s o...

Brett Brown Doesn’t Need To Instruct Ben Simmons To Miss Free Throws
The Sixers played the Warriors tough on Saturday night. Playing without Joel Embiid once again, Philly led by 14 points early in the third quarter and rallied back into the game after the Warriors blew by them. It was back and forth into the final seconds. Sure, Golden State ended up pulling out the...

Brett Brown Doesn’t Need To Instruct Ben Simmons To Miss Free Throws
The Sixers played the Warriors tough on Saturday night. Playing without Joel Embiid once again, Philly led by 14 points early in the third quarter and rallied back into the game after the Warriors blew by them. It was back and forth into the final seconds. Sure, Golden State ended up pulling out the...

Trae Young Ejected For The Crime Of Staring At Kris Dunn's Back For Too Long
Less than 48 hours removed from a game that lasted through four periods of overtime, the Atlanta Hawks are playing the Chicago Bulls again, this time in the Windy City. Just as he did on Friday, Trae Young was still putting up points with ease on the Bulls—though admittedly not quite at the same rat...

Trae Young Ejected For The Crime Of Staring At Kris Dunn's Back For Too Long
Less than 48 hours removed from a game that lasted through four periods of overtime, the Atlanta Hawks are playing the Chicago Bulls again, this time in the Windy City. Just as he did on Friday, Trae Young was still putting up points with ease on the Bulls—though admittedly not quite at the same rat...

Alex Len Momentarily Forgot He Was Playing Basketball While Trying To Secure A Rebound
It wasn’t until the fourth(!!) period of overtime between the Bulls and Hawks on Friday that one team started to separate itself from the other. I’m talking, of course, about the Hawks, who began to separate themselves as the worst of the two on the court with less than two minutes to go in what eve...

Alex Len Momentarily Forgot He Was Playing Basketball While Trying To Secure A Rebound
It wasn’t until the fourth(!!) period of overtime between the Bulls and Hawks on Friday that one team started to separate itself from the other. I’m talking, of course, about the Hawks, who began to separate themselves as the worst of the two on the court with less than two minutes to go in what eve...

Warriors Beaten On Just The Most Busted, Chaotic Dwyane Wade Buzzer-Beater
The Heat beat the Warriors Wednesday night in Miami, 126–125, in an outrageously fun basketball game. The Heat led by as many as 24 points, but the Warriors, who very often cruise distractedly through big chunks of regular season games, roared back into it and had the lead in the final minute of reg...

Warriors Beaten On Just The Most Busted, Chaotic Dwyane Wade Buzzer-Beater
The Heat beat the Warriors Wednesday night in Miami, 126–125, in an outrageously fun basketball game. The Heat led by as many as 24 points, but the Warriors, who very often cruise distractedly through big chunks of regular season games, roared back into it and had the lead in the final minute of reg...

Tottenham's Own Goal Somehow Makes Chelsea Look Competent
Watch out. Chelsea’s dumb meltdowns are apparently contagious....

Tottenham's Own Goal Somehow Makes Chelsea Look Competent
Watch out. Chelsea’s dumb meltdowns are apparently contagious....

This Beautiful But Needlessly Complicated Goal Is Sadio Mané In A Nutshell
Sadio Mané is the kind of player who tends to make easy things look unnecessarily difficult and impossible things look effortless. It’s hard to find a better encapsulation of this than the goal he scored today in Liverpool’s match against Watford:...

This Beautiful But Needlessly Complicated Goal Is Sadio Mané In A Nutshell
Sadio Mané is the kind of player who tends to make easy things look unnecessarily difficult and impossible things look effortless. It’s hard to find a better encapsulation of this than the goal he scored today in Liverpool’s match against Watford:...

Maybe Brad Stevens Isn't Quite Up To <i>This</i>
“We’re just not together. Plain and simple.” That’s Boston’s Marcus Smart, in the aftermath of the 118-95 ass-whomping his Celtics received at the hands of Pascal Siakam and the Toronto Raptors last night. By my informal count, this is something like the 917th time in this disappointing Boston seaso...

Maybe Brad Stevens Isn't Quite Up To <i>This</i>
“We’re just not together. Plain and simple.” That’s Boston’s Marcus Smart, in the aftermath of the 118-95 ass-whomping his Celtics received at the hands of Pascal Siakam and the Toronto Raptors last night. By my informal count, this is something like the 917th time in this disappointing Boston seaso...