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![Roundup: Your Best Clark The Cub Photoshop Contest Submissions [NSFW]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/19ctxj7urldbhjpg.jpg)
Roundup: Your Best Clark The Cub Photoshop Contest Submissions [NSFW]
Clark the Cub may very well go down as the best Photoshop contest subject in Deadspin history. We asked you to do horrible things to him, and you came through. Here now is your best work....
Messi Obliterates Defense And Scores In First Start Since Injury
Uh, yeah. Messi Back....
The Real Reason Ashley Wagner Made The U.S. Olympic Figure Skating Team
On Sunday, U.S. Figure Skating gave the final spot on its three-member women's Olympic team to Ashley Wagner, even though she had fallen twice the previous day during an "embarrassing" skate at the national championships in Boston. The other selections were Gracie Gold, the newly crowned national ch...
IOC Forces U.S. Olympic Goalie To Take Constitution Off Mask
That up there was the mask U.S. women's hockey goalie Jessie Vetter was going to wear at the Sochi Olympics. At least until the IOC forced her to take an image of the Constitution off the back....
Handball Player Scores Crazy Goal With Ingenious Ball Spin
This is one of those moves Falcao Mikkel Hansen has probably practiced on the playground(?) courts for years before finally unleashing in game. I wonder what the goalie's thinking....
The Wizards' Bandwagon Cam Is Brilliant
If you show up to a Wizards game decked out in the opposition's gear, prepare to be shamed on the jumbotron. This is the Wizards' bandwagon cam (we got a glimpse of this last night, but now we have video), which picks out fans who flaunt their flimsy affiliations with powerhouses like the Heat so th...
Jameer Nelson Did The Big Balls Dance
Last night's Bulls-Magic game was a three-overtime thriller marked by plenty of big shots, but it would just have been a standard 101-99 Bulls win if not for Jameer Nelson and his big balls. Here we see Nelson tying the game with a jumper in the closing seconds of the fourth quarter, and then hitti...
Greg Oden Played Basketball!
For the first time in more than four years, star-cross'd Greg Oden put on a uniform, entered an official NBA game, and dunked a basketball. His first thought? "It was a feeling of 'Get back on defense.'"...
Cristiano Ronaldo Scores Goal Off Goalie's Taint
Cristiano Ronaldo, fresh off of his 2013 Ballon d'Or, scored a goal after the ball bounced between the legs of Osasuna keeper Andres Fernandez and in for a 1-0 lead....
Meanwhile, in Chicago, Joel Reese defends Clark the Pantsless Cub. Neil Steinberg does not. Some highlights: "Horror ... pantsless obscenity ... Smurf-like blandness ... monstrosity ... homogenized ... this excrescence ... designed to pacify the sick children it visits in hospitals (thus freeing act...
What Every NFL Logo Would Look Like If It Were A Hipster
The man who has brought us so much joy by doing ridiculous, hilarious things to the logos of NFL teams has struck again. Today, artist David Rappoccio unveiled his latest collection: each NFL logo re-imagined as a hipster. Smug hipster jaguar is particularly inspired, but there are many more good on...
Comcast SportsNet Airs Our Version Of Cubs Mascot With Cock And Balls
Earlier this week we introduced you to terrifying Cubs mascot Clark The Cub and invited you to do horrible things to him. We started you off with Jim Cooke's full-frontal rendition, which is exactly what Comcast SportsNet Mid-Atlantic aired to viewers across the Washington, D.C. area tonight....
Old Man Asked To Stop Shooting Icicles On His House
How do you knock down icicles on your house? A shovel? A stick? Your hands? Those are all common and effective methods. One old man in Illinois went with his gun instead....
Cubs Are Disappointed You Did Such Filthy Things To Their New Mascot
It's been a rough two days for Clark the Cub, the Chicago Cubs' dumb new mascot. We put a gross dick on him, and a lot of other people did some not-so-nice things to him as well. The Cubs have noticed all of this, and they are tired of all the tomfoolery....
A Brief History Of Terrible Chicago Mascots
The Chicago Cubs unveiled their new mascot yesterday to little acclaim. That's what happens when you create a mascot that looks like a nightmarish, perverted furry and lends itself to horrible Photoshop alterations. But Clark the Cub is just the latest in a long line of ill-advised Chicago mascots. ...
Contest: Do Something Horrible To The Cubs' New, Perverted Mascot [NSFW?]
The Cubs' new mascot is a nightmarish, perverted furry, and it deserves to have horrible things done to it. Gawker art director Jim Cooke has already gotten this party started. Do your worst....
White Sox Hotel Rooming List Reveals Some Great Fake Names
This is the White Sox rooming list for a 2012 midweek series in St. Louis. We don't know the provenance, but we hadn't seen it until Anthony sent it to us, so we're passing it along....
The Cubs' New Mascot Is A Nightmarish, Perverted Furry
In an apparent effort to get the public to stop paying so much attention to their tenuous connections to the traditional baseball experience and start paying more attention to them as a baseball team, the Chicago Cubs have spent the last while systematically eradicating everything that's even remote...
Man Falls Through Golf Shop Ceiling; Everyone Plays It Way Cool
Someone, please, get Ron and Billy in a buddy cop movie ASAP. ...