go Page 650 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Sunderland's Ji Dong-Won Delivers Last-Second Winning Goal, Then Makes Out With A Fan
Sunderland continued a giant-killing weekend in the English Premier League by stunning Manchester City in the final seconds of stoppage time with a goal by Ji Dong-Won....

BYU Won The Military Armed Forces Bowl By Bearing False Witness
Brigham Young University, the school that suspends you for daring to have sex, holds no such stringency to the words of the Lord when it comes to running football plays. This one earned the Cougars the Military Armed Forces Bowl trophy and, sure, it's a stretch to call a fake spike "lying," but it...

The Faces Of 2011: A Gallery Of Derp Portraiture
Roger Goodell Is Going To Be A Big Baby About This Lockout Until The Very End...

If You Look Like Josh Elliott And Live In The Tri-State Area, This Lady Would Like To Hump You
A reader has alerted of us of a rather specific No Strings Attached request on the New York City Craigslist, and because we're still in the holiday spirit here, we thought we'd pass along the posting on the off-chance that anyone out there might qualify....

Break Out The Flat Top: Greg Ostertag Is Making A Comeback In The D-League
Without cheating, guess how long Greg Ostertag has been retired? It was only five years ago, when an out-of-shape Ostertag was playing limited minutes behind Mehmet Okur and mentoring a young Kris Humphries. But it's been even longer since he was effective, and longer than that since he played for a...

LaMichael James Rides Space Mountain Roller Coaster, Looks Completely Terrified
Your morning roundup for Dec. 28, the day we learned they're onto us. Photo courtesy Kegs 'N Eggs, via Larry Brown Sports. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Ilya Kovalchuk Scored A 180-Foot Own Goal, And They Credited It To Cam Ward
When I saw the scoresheet for yesterday's Devils/Hurricanes game, I mostly ran around in circles yelling "Goalie goal!" over and over again. For fans of novelty highlights, goalie goals are up there with unassisted triple plays as one of the rarest and most valuable sporting occurrences....

Yes, That's Golden State Fans Chanting "Beat L.A." About The Clippers
There's some debate about the last time the Clippers were on the business end of a "Beat L.A." chant (ClipperBlog says '05-'06) but it's a bizarre thing to observe nonetheless. Congrats, Clips, you've made it back to the big time. [ESPN]...

About That Whole "Good Will Toward Men" Thing
It's Christmas Eve, but there was no peace on Earth in (apparently) heathen Hawai'i, as the first half of the Sheraton Hawai'i Bowl got ugly with a brief bit of violence after Southern Miss scored a touchdown to take a lead into the locker room. [ESPN]...

Football In The Dark Is An Illuminating Thing
We're doing a season-long NFL roundtable with our friends at Slate. Check back here each week as a rotating cast of football watchers discusses the weekend's key plays, coaching decisions, and traumatic brain injuries....

The Attorney For The Lady Suing Monta Ellis Will Not Let You See The Dong Shot Ellis Allegedly Texted Her
"The only reason we showed it to the press was so they would know we were serious," attorney Burt Boltuch told me. "No. I don't want it out there in the media." I told him we did this kind of thing here. Didn't change his mind....

Good Lord, These FIU Fans Are Drunk
ESPN has a Beef 'O'Brady's Bowl crowd mic in the middle of a section of enthusiastic FIU fans. Here's that audio channel isolated during a controversial spot in the second half of a tied football game. Eventually the fans stop using language entirely and start communicating in grunts. [ESPN]...

Former Bears WR Willie Gault Is Being Accused Of Securities Fraud
A member of the '85 Super Bowl shufflers, Gault is one of six people allegedly connected with a scheme to falsely inflate the stock price of a company that makes heart-monitoring equipment. Smooth as a chocolate swirl. [Bloomberg]...

Lawsuit Will Claim Monta Ellis Sent A "Pretty Disgusting" Cellphone Pic To Warriors Employee
Per the Contra Costa Times:...

Strikers Spend Their Lives Dreaming Of A Score As Pretty As This Own Goal
Welcome to YouTube, Festus Baise. The Nigerian defender, playing for Citizen in the Hong Kong first division, went reverse scorpion on his own net. Setting aside the unfortunate result, what was he hoping to accomplish? He was either going for the most stylish clearance of all time, or had a mid-a...

Arizona State And Southern Miss Rumble After This All-Time Classic Sucker Punch
The resulting fight in Tempe wasn't on the scale of the one between Xavier and Cincinnati last week, but the punch that sparked it is so brutally dirty it's almost a work of art. After getting a forearm to the jaw from USM's Torye Pelham, ASU's Muscovite center Ruslan Pateev returns the favor with...

Albert Pujols's Wife Is "Mad At God," The Cubs Are Looking For A First Baseman, And More From The Hot Fucking Stove
Your roundup of all the hottest hot-stove items of the day (and whatever shit Ken Rosenthal is throwing against the wall). This is ... HOT FUCKING STOVE!!...

Breaking Down The Football In <i>The Dark Knight Rises</i>
It's nerd Christmas, as the trailer for The Dark Knight Rises was released today to the orgiastic squeals of the internet. There's plenty to take in: Bane's unintelligible speech, Anne Hathaway's vie to become the first woman since Michelle Pfeiffer to actually add something to a superhero movie—b...

Here's The Brutal Back Injury That Led To Bears WR Johnny Knox Being Carted Off The Field
There's at least one gruesome injury a week in the NFL, but they're usually of the ankle, knee, or elbow variety. This one's a bit different, and really pretty horrible to watch. ...

Driverless Golf Cart Wreaks Havoc At High School Football Championship Game
The conclusion of the Texas 5A Division 2 championship game saw the usual thrill of victory and agony of—OH MY GOD, RUN! THE MACHINES ARE SELF AWARE....