go Page 675 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
NFL Is Surprisingly Uncool With Its Players Appearing In Uniform Advertising "Pornstar Exxxtravaganza"
To be fair, those five players are Brandon Flowers, Eric Berry, Kareem Jackson, Jacoby Ford, and Major Wright, and we're willing to bet most potential patrons of the Pornstar Exxxtravaganza wouldn't have identified them all. They needed their uniforms....
PGA's Young Golfers Form Parody Boy Band, Sing And Rap Horribly, We All Die A Little Inside
Tipster William writes in to alert us to "some kind of music group [Bubba Watson, Rickie Fowler, Hunter Mahan, and Ben Crane] have put together." He says it seems like it's a joke and publicity stunt. And it's "very, very lame."...
Far Too Late, Roberto Luongo Realized Depth Perception Was Important To Goalies
Your morning roundup for June 14, the day we wished our father didn't love old comedians. (Thanks to Andy for the screengrab.)...
Watch Man U's Gary Neville Throw A Truly Terrible First Pitch At A White Sox Game
Gary Neville, who played right back for England and Manchester United for perhaps forever, before retiring this year, was in Chicago on Thursday night to throw out the first pitch before the White Sox-A's game. Man U and the Chicago Fire will be playing a friendly shortly. He and his 400 caps are ...
Bill Plaschke Tries Bill Simmons On For Size
With today's game six preview column, Plaschke has entered the pantheon of writers who write like Bill Simmons....
This Is How Panama Thanks Us For The Canal
Your morning roundup for June 12, the day we made out with Mary-Kate....
New Jersey Man Threatens Lawsuit Because His Daughter Didn't Make The All-County Softball First Team
A high school softball player hits .571 (which was not, by the way, the best average on her team) with nine homers and 46 RBI, and she doesn't make the all-state team. Tough shit, homegirl, most would say. We've all had our disappointments, especially in high school. But our fathers never sued....
US Soccer's Gold Cup Chances Improve After Five Mexican Players Test Positive For PEDs
Decio de María Serrano, the secretary general of Mexican soccer, announced today that five players on the Mexican national soccer team currently poised to dominate the Gold Cup tested positive for a substance called Clenbuterol, which is the same drug that Alberto Contador tested positive for at las...
Roger Goodell Is Waving His Dick Around Only Because He Loves Us So Much
Roger Goodell said some bullshit yesterday that, I swear, the Serious Football Media would've tsk-tsked as "counterproductive rhetoric" had anything so disingenuous come out of De Smith's mouth. Here's what the commisioner told Tampa Bay season ticketholders in a conference call:...
Holy Balls Tim Tebow Is Ripped
And so ends any critical or mocking coverage of Mr. Tebow in these pages. Out of respect, yes, but mostly fear. [Twitpic, via Speedy Weederson]...
Hunter Mahan Is The PGA's Rock-Loving "Hip Young Face," But His Favorite Band Is Linkin Park
You want to know how starved the PGA is for a post-Tiger, post-Phil star? Exhibit A: This pre-US Open New York Times feature on Hunter Mahan, who's currently 18th in the world rankings....
Please Take Ozzie Guillen's Belt And Razor Away From Him
You might as well take his BlackBerry too. Because the White Sox's eccentric manager is having some kind of existential meltdown today and figured he should share....
Patrick Kane Does Something Really Nice
PK showed up at a 10-year-old fan's floor hockey birthday, because he's an all-around decent guy. See Patrick? We love you! Please come back to us, Patrick. [Chicago Tribune]...
Ronnie Woo Woo Gives Up On The Cubs, Wants Paul McCartney Tickets Instead
Our tipster Steven works for a ticket company out of Chicago, and wrote in to tell us that he'd had beloved Cubs fan Ronnie "Woo Woo" Wickers in the office today. He even attached a photo: "Woo_Woo_Office_Visit.jpg." Ronnie was wearing his Cubs uniform, which is no surprise; what is is that one of t...
West Virginia's Toxic Circus: The Boozer, The Lame Duck, And The Vengeful Coach's Wife
West Virginia's coaching situation is, to put it as mildly as we can, a total clusterfuck. Whoever in the athletics office thought it would be a good idea to hire Dana Holgorsen as head-coach-in-waiting, while still keeping current coach Bill Stewart around for another year, ought to find themselves...
Rampage Jackson Mocking, Humping, And/Or Mistreating Retarded People, Fat People, Gays, Women, Japanese Men, And A Door: A Gallery
Earlier this week, Rampage Jackson, an "alpha male" who also competes as a professional mixed martial artist, stuck his face into the cleavage of a female reporter (who handled the intrusion better than many might have). When another female reporter complained, however,, the MMA community's alpha ...
Beer In The Stanley Cup Looks Like Piss: More From The Patrick Kane Collection
Would you believe it's been a year, to the week, of the Blackhawks capturing the most famous trophy in all of professional sports? To remind you what Vancouver and Boston are playing for, here are a couple new photos from Patrick Kane's time with the Stanley Cup. ...
Who Wants To See A Golf Cart Hit A Tree?
According to a commenter on Shane Bacon's blog, this is from the Ladies European Tour. Can we still make woman driver jokes if it was a male course official? How about European driver jokes? [Dogs Chasing Cars]...
Cubs Have Upside Down Logo At Wrigley, Possibly As Some Sort Of Distress Signal
This oopsie is apparently located on the wall of a tunnel near the Cubs clubhouse. Has it been like this for the last 95 years and no one's noticed? Possibly. ...
Watch The Five Greatest NBA Finals Moments, As Performed By Legos
Tauntr has done the Lord's work. Now, if only someone could make a Playmobil version of the WNBA Finals' highlights. [Tauntr]...