go Page 752 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
CSI: Beijing
Came in fourth in the 100 butterfly at the Summer Olympics? There's still hope for a medal. Oh, and if you already have one, we'd suggest hiding it. [NBCSports]...
Chicago Cubs Become Pawn In Most Obvious Corruption Scandal Ever
This just in—Illinois politicians are kinda corrupt. As you may have heard, Governor Rod Blagojevich (henceforth known as "Blago") was arrested by FBI agents on federal corruption charges, after he "put a for sale sign" on the appointment of the new Senator to replace President-Elect Barack Obama. H...
If A Game Lasts Longer Than Four Hours, Please Consult Your Doctor
A reader writes: "Hey guys, So I hate to have to play the "penis" card here, but somebody down in North Carolina needs to be admonished for selecting a logo with some very Freudian undertones."...
It Goes To Eleven ...
Well, that was fast. The Tribune Company files for Chapter 11 bankruptcy, but the Cubs — whom they're hoping to sell by early April — aren't included in the filing. [Market Watch]...
Derrick Rose Injured In Freak Apple Peeling Incident
Derrick Rose's NBA career is off to a phenomenal start. The number one overall pick is averaging 18 points and six assists so far in his rookie year, he's already become the leader of his Chicago Bulls squad, and his highlight reel moves are electrifying crowds across the land. It seems the only thi...
Nude High School Cheerleaders Now Less Nude, Sue School
It's a good thing they didn't have cell phones when I was in high school; I'd still be there trying to graduate. You may have heard of the Bothell, WA high school cheerleaders who took naked cell phone pictures of themselves and then "accidentally" sent them to the entire school. Well, their parents...
Will Cubs Be Destitute, Eating From Dumpsters In 2009?
With the Wall Street Journal reporting that the Tribune Company has hired bankruptcy advisers, Chicago Cubs fans are preparing for the worst (as if they ever prepare for the best). Will the team, which is owned by the Tribune, be able to afford Jake Peavy? Will a reputable buyer ever come forward? W...
The Cultural Evolution of Brian Collins' Unwanted Catchphrase Continues
Via World of Isaac:...
Bottoms Up, Hawkeyes: Ruminations On Metrodome Bathroom Sex, Plus, How To Make A Bull Gator
Time for another edition of Waxing Off, the feature born of that venerable site The Black Table and carried over here and given a sporty new coat of paint. This week we've asked five talented female writers to ruminate on: Lois Feldman and the Iowa Hawkeye Metrodome Sexcapade....
Deadspin Reader Heroically Attends Screening Of Ryan Leaf Movie
In a simpler time, Mike Sebeckis was known as Seabass, Deadspin commenter extraordinaire. A software engineer who has been living in San Diego for 2 1/2 years, he doesn't have much time to frolic in the comments section these days; although he is still a regular reader and thinks Baby Mangino is a l...
This UFL Logo Is Easy To Swallow, But Hard To Take In
Remember that Communications 101 class you took where you'd spend hours inspecting the Land O Lakes package with a magnifying glass to search for penis-shaped trees? That was fun. But thankfully the United Football League has taken a less than subtle approach with its subliminal message. Yes, it ver...
Layla Kiffin Is Turning Into A Very Popular Woman
Remember back when www.fireronzook.com was the height of internet genius? Now we've moved on to a coach's wife. And by we I mean anonymous internet web sites. In the wake of Lane Kifffin's introductory press conference, Layla Kiffin has received an ample amount of attention. How much? On Monday aft...
Coming Soon To A Library Near You ...
If you're like me, you're constantly writing to Paramount and TriStar demanding to know when the life of Ryan Leaf will be made into a movie. Put away that spec script, because it's already here. Filmmaker Tim Carr has made Leaf, an 82-minute film about the former Chargers quarterback, which, accord...
This Is How Quickly A Game Can Turn
Last night, after a ridiculously silly personal foul penalty by Benny Sapp kept a Chicago drive alive, the Bears found themselves at the one-yard line with a 7-3 lead late in the first-half. A field goal would have given them a nice advantage heading toward halftime, while a touchdown would have put...
Welcome To Black Friday, America's Own Running Of The Bulls
Some of you are not old enough to remember the Cabbage Patch Riots of 1983, a dark time in our history when lawlessness ruled; where roving gangs of middle-aged women in housecoats would beat you senseless for a children's doll. Above is one of my favorite videos of all time, in which, at about the ...
College Football Preview: In-State Rivalries Take Center Stage
Texas beat Texas A&M 49-9 yesterday. They're now 11-1. But unless you were in Texas you had no idea this game was happening. Even I didn't think to check this score until late Thursday night. That's because I spent Thanksgiving with family. Included in part of my day was a trip to Ford Field to wat...
If This Is A Fling At Racial Profiling, They're Doing It Wrong
Community leaders are in an uproar over the situation at Danville (Ill.) High School, where the basketball coach, they say, used racial profiling when he cut eight members of the varsity team recently. Here's where they lost me, however: It's an all-black team. Racial profiling attempt in Danville, ...
Citi Field and Manchester United: Your Tax Dollars At Work
The government's bailout of our collapsing financial industry continues apace—you got your check, right?—but now that these companies are playing with our money, suddenly everyone is an expert. Some are suggesting that maybe the reason these firms are in trouble is because they like to waste money a...
Yeah, What Is That Smoke You're Blowing, Mr. Artest?
So, I completely missed this upon first viewing of Ron Artest's vlog post, but thanks to Pete Gaines, it was brought to my attention: Artest appears to be smoking...something. Maybe it's a cigarette. Maybe it's a napkin stuffed with pine needles. Maybe he's doing a dragon impersonation. Or, you know...
Blue Nail Polish, Cinderella Diapers And You
Brian Urlacher's estranged lady friend, Tyna Robertson, told a Will County Court on Tuesday that she barred Urlacher from seeing their 3-year-old son because Urlacher painted the child's toenails blue and allowed him to wear Cinderella pull-up diapers. Note to Bears fans: This story includes the ter...