go Page 773 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

About Last Night
What you missed while being assaulted with Moon Pies ... • NBA: Lakers take 3-1 series lead over Spurs, situating themselves perfectly for monumental collapse. • MLB: Let there be light! Santana delivers, as Mets crawl back from the brink of despair, beat Marlins 5-3. • Despite Will's sudden departu...

We Must All Protect Alfonso Soriano's Feelings
You know the Cubs are competitors this year because their fans are getting ornery. And the target of their orneriness has been Alfonso Soriano, who plays left field as if he's crossing ice with eels as slippers. But the Cubs organization has had just about enough of fans' darned negativity....

Boston Getting A Head Start On The Head Start Memorabilia
Just to appropriately taunt the sporting dieties — Patriots style — this T-shirt has officially been on racks. We're not sure what this says about Deadspin readers, but three different people sent this to us over the weekend from the same ESPN Store at Disneyworld in Orlando....

Former Major Leaguer Killed By Lightning, As We Are Left To Ponder, WTF?
As we open the file of stuff you never in a million years thought would happen: Former major leaguer Geremi Gonzalez was killed by lightning on Sunday while riding a personal watercraft on a lake in his native Venezuela. You may recall that Gonzalez won 11 games for the Cubs as a rookie in 1997, but...

Tiny Man Celebrates Bulls' Blind Luck
The tiny man you see here — and "tiny," of course, is relative to two men standing next to him; in reality, he's probably 6-foot-9 — is Steve Schanwald, executive VP of the Chicago Bulls. He was a very happy tiny man last night; it's a good thing Chicago isn't a huge city with a potentially rabid f...

There Goes My Hero: Golden Richards Won't Wake Up
Being a sports reporter is, at times, an absolutely horrible job. Sure you get to watch games, travel and interact with athletes, but there is a horrendous downside. (Which is pretty much everything else.) And this is never more disturbingly clear than when a reporter has their first (or 50th) awful...

About Last Night
What you missed while observing just another typical day in Arkansas ... • NBA: Tears on Bourbon Street as Spurs dump Hornets, 91-82, in Game 7, to earn date with Lakers. • NHL: Red Wings beat Stars 4-1 to advance to finals. Um, hey ... where's the riot? • MLB: Albert Pujols clouts two homers, puts ...

Previewing the Running of the Horses
The Preakness Stakes is finally upon us and Maryland students couldn't be more eager to get fucked up in celebration (it's not a real party without Scott Van Pelt). Since I know incredibly little about horse racing, I've turned to Randy, a lover of both equines and Deadspin. His words are after the ...

Greg Oden Needs To Come Back Soon
Greg Oden, honestly, you can't back to the NBA fast enough. We're not sure what's going on with his hair here, but we still love it. We fully expect to run into Oden at, like, half the parties we go to....

Boston Little League Crushes Rogue Parent, Keeps Nation Free For Democracy
A seven-year-old Boston area Little Leaguer was benched for two games recently when his mother didn't show up for her scheduled shift at the league snack bar. The Freetown Youth Athletic Association levied the penalty on the child due to his scofflaw mother, who claims that — get this — she had to w...

The Problem With The Padres? Tight Booties
What's wrong with the Padres? With Thursday's 4-0 loss to the Cubs, our Closest Team to Mexico is at 15-27, the worst record in the majors ... that's more horrible than Detroit, folks. The big reason seems to be the strikeouts-per-at-bats ratio, or as scientists call it, tight booties. Just listen ...

Lance Briggs Is The New Shawn Kemp
You say you like the Athletes Making Babies site? Well, then you're gonna love the tale of the smooth operator that is Bears linebacker Lance Briggs....

Ryan Leaf Cleans Out The Attic Of Tearful Regret
Was it really 10 years ago that the Indianapolis Colts made the fateful decision to draft Peyton Manning over Ryan Leaf in the NFL draft? To mark the occasion, Leaf is showing off his No. 16 Colts jersey — yep, one such exists — which he found while rummaging through some personal belongings recentl...

Man: The Edmonds Thing Is Really Happening
Augh ... man, the Cubs really did sign Jim Edmonds. Other than Pujols or Willie McGee signing with those guys, we can't imagine our brains hurting more than they do to see this. And we're sure Cubs fans don't feel any better about it. Proceed with extreme caution, Jim; Cards fans can no longer prot...

Cubs Have Second-Best Record In Baseball! (Me No Like Bizarro World)
If it weren't for those insufferable Diamondbacks, who play in the NL West and therefore should only get to count every other win, the Chicago Cubs would be our new overlords. As it is the Northsiders have a 24-16 record after their 8-5 win over the Padres on Wednesday, one game worse than Arizona's...

Reggie Miller Does Not Believe In Shot Glasses Or Belvedere
Yes, that's former Indiana Pacers sharpshooter Reggie Miller filling the mouth of what appears to be a very thirsty woman with a few fingers of Grey Goose....

Who's Quitting Now? Annika Sorenstam, Among Others
Now this is the way to quit. Simple announcement, no ambiguity, definite schedule for withdrawal. Annika Sorenstam, who announced on Tuesday that she's leaving the LPGA Tour at the end of the season, is employing an exit strategy the Bush Administration is envying. Oh, and you can also bet that she'...

Has Troubled Joe Phillips Resurfaced Online?
Most of us not in the Kansas City-area probably heard first about former Chiefs' defensive lineman Joe Phillips' troubles through the fascinating HBO Real Sports segment from last January titled "Family Burden." The story focused on a handful of wives of ex-NFL players going through hard times physi...

Boston Herald Gets Wingo'd Into Apology, Readers Revolt
During yesterday's Spygate meet-and-greet with the press, Roger Goodell and Matt Walsh revealed everything and nothing as to how this whole misguided mess actually transpired. What we do know? According to Goodell, Patriots coach Bill Belichick continues to be full of shit about his misreading of th...