golden Page 85 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

One Way To Get Tree-Sitters Down
You might remember the comedic goodness we unearthed when making fun of the Berkeley tree-sitters who were about to be overrun by rabid SEC football fans. Well, we figured we'd check in and see how those tree-sitters were doing. Turns out, not well....

October Was Not Kind To The Bay Area
It's been a rough couple of weeks for sports fans in the ol' Bay Area. The Warriors look to have lost last year's sexy playoff mojo; the 49ers are struggling to even notch a 100 yards per game; and the Raiders keep finding (fairly impressive) ways to giveaway football games....

Warriors Refuse To Come Out And Play
• Who Still Believes? A glaring absence of celebrity fans on Tuesday in Oakland, as the Warriors dropped to 0-4 with a 108-104 loss to the Cavaliers. My yellow "We Believe" T-shirt has only been worn once, and already is in danger of becoming obsolete. In the meantime, let's let Golden State of Mind...

Hey, The NBA Season Is Starting!
The NBA season tips off tonight, and we should all take heed: It'll be the last time anybody cares about an NBA regular season game. Enjoy!...

As If Boston Didn't Have A Good Enough Night Already
Not that anyone in Boston saw it last night — seriously, ESPN had to have been cursing the scheduling gods — but Boston College, still ranked No. 2 in the country, garnered its most impressive and dramatic win in a decade...

Up Close And Personal With Ned
We're just about 27 hours away from the monstrous battle between Miami and Florida International, and the return of Ned....

At Last, Ned Has His Opportunity At Revenge
Sure, you can talk all you want about Michigan-Notre Dame — and the apparent curse of Bo Schembechler — but the real story this weekend is what's happening at the Orange Bowl on Saturday. That's right: It's the return of Ned!...

Trees Are No Match For Vols Fans
Ah, the classic liberal enclave of Berkeley. Aging hippies, still listening to Workingman's Dead on 33 rpm, railing against the capitalist system and eating all kinds of food that tastes terrible. Where would we be without them? They remind us of what college campuses used to be like, before everybo...

Artest And Jackson Already Suspended For Next Season
This is an interesting way to end the blogging day: Ron Artest and Stephen Jackson were just suspended by the NBA for the first seven games of next season. Yes, you read that correctly: next season....

Mark Cuban Is Suing Don Nelson For Knowing His Team
You know, it's possible that Mark Cuban isn't quite over his Mavericks' loss to the Warriors in the first round of the NBA Playoffs. How can we tell? Because he's actually suing Don Nelson for having "confidential information" and using it in the Warriors' victory. He's really doing this....

Stuart Scott Is The Broadcasting Equivalent Of Hudson Hawk
As Awful Announcing reported yesterday, tonight, ESPN will bring you a Very Special "SportsCenter" featuring Bruce Willis, Live Free Or Die Hard and all kinds of WACKY HIJINKS....

Don Nelson Will Get Back To You On Whether He Believes
As George Costanza famously noted, it's important to go out on a high note. If you tell a joke at a party and get a huge laugh, you excuse yourself and quit while you're ahead. Apparently subscribing to this philosophy, Warriors coach Don Nelson — having vanquished the invincible Mavericks with a te...

Thanks For The Memories (At Least The Ones We Could Stay Up Late Enough For)
We salute the Golden State Warriors for the ride they've taken us on, but after last night's once-again-convincing 100-87 Jazz victory, they're the first team to be eliminated from the conference semifinals. And the Warriors fans are rather Zen about the whole thing....

Last Call For Bandwagonners
We've never been as offended by bandwagon fans as most people are. When Bill Murray started following around the Illini during their Final Four year, we didn't mind: It was Bill Murray, for crying out loud....

Apparently, The Warriors Can Lose At Home
In their their preview of the Suns-Spurs series, Free Darko, describing Stephen Jackson and the Golden State Warriors, wrote, "Stephen Jackson doesn't care because he has nothing to lose, and thus is invincible." For the first time, last night, his team looked like it cared, like it had a lot to los...

To Watch Tonight...
• 8:00, ESPN. MLB. Detroit Tigers @ Minnesota Twins. A guy named Boof should have a giant red afro, or a curly mustache or something. • 8:00, Comedy Central. Movie. Bad Santa. Underrated in my view, but cursing at children makes me laugh. Don't judge me. • 9:30, TNT. NBA Playoffs. Utah Jazz @ Golden...

Baron Davis Climbs Andrei Kirilenko
If you watch closely, you can see Andrei Kirilenko looking back at Baron Davis afterwards, as if to say, "You know, that really wasn't necessary." Even Adonal Foyle crinkled up his nose in a "Damn that was nasty," kind of a way. When Adonal Foyle acknowledges the nastiness, you know things just got ...

Wild Nights In Salt Lake City
Just Call Me Juice points out what we're all thinking but are afraid to admit: These NBA playoffs have been so much more entertaining than the NCAA Tournament. (Assuming, of course, you ignore the Eastern Conference.) Last night's wild overtime thriller, a mad hatter 127-117 Jazz win over the Warrio...