hi Page 1088 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Phillies have effectively fired Ruben Amaro Jr. as GM after seven seasons. His early moves were understandable—the team was still good enough that future-mortgaging moves to keep their window open were defensible—but he’s had more than enough time since then to rebuild and restock, and hasn’t su...
Is Notre Dame's President A Liar Or A Fraud?
If it’s been too long since the last time you got teeth-achingly angry over some dipshit’s explanation for why college football players shouldn’t be paid, head on over to The New York Times and read Dan Barry’s conversation with Notre Dame’s president, Rev. John I. Jenkins....
An R.E.M. Song For Each 2016 Presidential Candidate
So Donald Trump took the stage at an anti-Iran-deal rally to the strains of R.E.M.’s “It’s the End of the World as We Know It (And I Feel Fine),” and Michael Stipe got all salty about it, and, well, look out. You’re welcome....
Here, Illustrated, Is Every Nats Fan
Take comfort in your friends....
The Cardinals Played A Center Fielder Who Can't Throw
The Cardinals just beat the Cubs 4-3 in the last of a three-game set, avoiding the sweep and earning one of those Important Victories that will be referenced when the team’s playoff readiness is discussed. It was an exciting game, complete with a three-run, eighth-inning rally and some spectacular p...
America Has Always Wanted To Pretend That Sports Aren't Work
Last month, given the chance to affirm that college athletes have basic labor rights, the National Labor Review Board punted. It’s rare that a sports metaphor so perfectly crafted for lazy headline writers is so fitting, but punting—the most cowardly, spineless, and responsibility-evading decision r...
Matt Williams Fucks Up Again, Gets Booed At His Press Conference
Washington Nationals manager Matt Williams has spent most of the last week doing everything he can to ensure that his team’s slide out of playoff contention continues without a hitch. If his recent handling of the bullpen had Nats fans bashing their heads against walls, last night’s managerial perfo...
Yoenis Cespedes Error Turns Michael Taylor Single Into Little League Grand Slam
Every right-thinking baseball fan is also a Yoenis Cespedes fan—and he has been hitting like Babe Ruth since joining the Mets at the trade deadline—but man this is an absolutely brutal error. ...
What Did The Patriots' Alleged Spygate Guru Actually <i>Do</i>?
In ESPN’s motherlode about the Patriots’ hilarious history of cheating over the last decade and a half, you’ll notice a mysterious character at the heart of the videotaping operation: “football research director” Ernie Adams. To close observers of the Patriots organization, Adams has been a matter o...
We Tried The New Lay's Flavors So You Don't Have To (Please Don't)
In its infinite potato-chip-making and marketing wisdom, the Frito-Lay snack behemoth has sifted through entries in their latest Lay’s “Do Us A Flavor” contest (this year’s theme: “Taste of America”), narrowed it down to four finalists, and encouraged We The People to vote for our fave. Plus, there’...
The Nats Are On Life Support, And Matt Williams Is Yanking Away At The Plug
Manager Matt Williams isn’t totally to blame for what’s happened to the Nats this season—they are, hands down, the most disappointing team in baseball, and their 93-win over-under from the start of the year is looking more and more hilarious by the day—but that doesn’t mean he shouldn’t be punted in...
Patrick Kane Grand Jury Hearing Postponed Amid Reported Settlement Talks
A 23-person grand jury was to begin hearing the case of Patrick Kane today, to decide whether to indict the Blackhawks star on sexual assault allegations. That hearing has been postponed, the Buffalo News reports, with two sources telling the paper that attorneys for Kane and his accuser may be disc...
Cardale Jones Didn't Know He Was Starting Until The First Series
The only meaningful bit of pregame intrigue surrounding Ohio State’s season opener against Virginia Tech was the question of who would be the Buckeyes’ starting quarterback. With Braxton Miller moving to receiver, the choice was down to J.T. Barrett and Cardale Jones, and both were kept in the dark ...
Bryce Harper: Nationals Fans Leaving Early Was "Brutal"
Early-September series don’t get much more important than Mets-Nats, not with each game being a two-game swing in the standings and a wild card all but out of reach for the loser. The Mets came to Washington four games up, so for the Nationals, this is basically a playoff series. Bryce Harper wishes...
Kansas State Band Insists They Were Not In Dong Formation
Kansas State officials continue to apologize for anyone they might have offended by Saturday’s Jayhawk-vs-dong marching band formation, while insisting there was “no ill intention.” The Star Trek-themed program purported to show the U.S.S. Enterprise attacking a “horrible space creature,” but to nea...
An Idiot Invaded <i>WWE Raw</i> Tonight
It’s a miracle, given the proximity to and fanatical attitudes of fans at live wrestling events, that Idiots On The Field don’t turn up more often. But it happened tonight in Baltimore, as someone invaded the set and actually managed to hang around a bit during Seth Rollins’s ring entrance on WWE Ra...
This Is Perfect
Ohio State is doing typical Ohio State things against Virginia Tech, but this spin move by Braxton Miller—one that led to a 53 yard touchdown—is anything but ordinary....
New York Mets Outlast Washington Nationals In Crucial Fail-Off
The New York Mets woke up this morning with a four-game lead on the second-place Washington Nationals and three games coming up against them directly; these being the Mets, the question of the day was whether they were fucked as of right now, or about to set up some greater act of late-September fuc...
High Schoolers Who Attacked Ref Suspended, Could Face Criminal Charges
The two San Antonio-area high school football players who targeted and blindsided an official during a game Friday have been suspended and could face criminal charges, according to ESPN....
High School Football Players Target, Light Up Poor Official [UPDATE]
Marble Falls (Tex.) beat San Antonio John Jay 15-9 Friday night, and the above video is purportedly from that game. We have no other context to it, other than the title which alleges the umpire was targeted by John Jay players “because of a bad call.”...