hi Page 1586 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Lionel Messi's Hat Trick-Finishing Goal Brought Announcer Ray Hudson To Orgasm
Barcelona spanked Málaga 4-1 today in La Liga, and the world's best soccer player Lionel Messi took over as Spain's leading scorer on the season with this hat trick-finishing goal. It sent commentator Ray Hudson into an even more over-the-top frenzy than usual, from his cats-mating shriek to his e...
This Is The Bill Walsh Coaching Tree On A Man's Ass
The ass you are looking at belongs to a 35 year-old intern for The Don Geronimo Show on 1140 The Fan out in Sacramento, California. Earlier in the week, the show posed the question "What would you do for NFC Championship game tickets?" Logically, the intern responded that he would get a tattoo of t...
Deadspin Archives: Brent Musburger Offers Some Troubling News About Joe Paterno
In October 2008, before most of the world knew anything about Jerry Sandusky, Brent Musburger was a guest on the Dan Patrick Show and offered a now seemingly prophetic glimpse into what kept Joe Paterno going. Originally published October 15, 2008....
Ricardo Clark's 97th-Minute Goal Gave The U.S. Their First Win Over A South American Team In Five Years
A 13-match winless streak against South American squads came to an end tonight when Ricardo Clark finally found net in the final moments of stoppage time of the United States' friendly against Venezuela....
Duke's 45-Game Home Winning Streak Is Over Thanks To This Florida State Buzzer-Beater
It's about the craziest (sorry, Cameronians) 15 seconds of basketball you'll get in the ACC, as Florida State's Michael Snaer connected with a buzzer-beating three-pointer to down Duke 76-73 just five seconds after the Blue Devils tied it up on an Austin Rivers layup. Credit Luke Loucks for the m...
Florida Law Requires Stadiums to Shelter Homeless On Off Nights; Not A Single One Has Complied
As is the case in most cities with professional franchises, the buildings that host Florida's professional sports teams have been built with the assistance of taxpayer contributions. It's played off as a symbiotic relationship (new stadium means new jobs, more revenue coming in, etc.) but most of t...
Don't Hire Bill Belichick: TV Network Heads Are Shockingly Stupid
The conventional wisdom is that Bill Belichick is the greatest football coach in the history of the world. On this point, conventional wisdom may be right. Who knows, or cares really, it's all so subjective. What is not subjective is that Bill Belichick is one of the greatest football coaches in th...
Here's Clint Dempsey's Hat Trick Today, The First-Ever By An American In The English Premier League
Our own Luke O'Brien predicted in August a big season for American midfielder Clint Dempsey as he started his sixth season playing for Fulham in the EPL, and the past two weeks have borne that prediction in a big way. Dempsey followed his FA Cup hat trick two weeks ago with another today against ...
Michigan State Head Coach Mark Dantonio Acts Like Michigan's Little Brother
During a panel discussion on recruiting before the Michigan High School Football Coaches Association, Mark Dantonio stoked the flames of the Michigan-Michigan State rivalry. While Michigan State sent its head coach to the event, Brady Hoke was busy being honored as a finalist for the Bear Bryant Aw...
Indiana Pacers Mascot Shatters Backboard At High School Basketball Game
It's hard to top the New Palestine-Triton Central rivalry in Indiana high school hoops but Boomer, the Indiana Pacers mascot, just upped the ante. While the Pacers were on the road against the Warriors last night, Boomer paid a visit and put on a show those in attendance would not soon forget. Boo...
Deadspin's Better-Late-Than-Never Guide To The English Premier League
Illustration by Matthew Craven. Lots more on his website....
Mario Chalmers Just Found Out That He Has A 20-Month Old Daughter Named "Queen Elizabeth"
Congratulations to the Heat guard. If money's tight, he can always cut the $2000 he spends monthly on the most unnecessary bodyguard in the world. [Miami New Times]...
Franco Harris Wants Joe Paterno Reinstated For Four Games Next Season, Because Franco Harris Has Lost His Mind
Never mind the alleged victims of Jerry Sandusky's child sex abuse: Joe Paterno is the biggest victim of all. At least that seems to be the opinion of those deluded Penn Staters who continue to make Paterno their primary concern. And arguably no one has tilted more stupidly at that stupid windmill ...
Homemade Infographic: Google Images Isn't Excited About The Los Angeles Clippers Yet
Have Chris Paul and Blake Griffin led Los Angeles's No. 2 NBA team into a new era of respect and recognition yet? Here's an analysis of results from a Google Images search for "Clippers": ...
Ryan Miller: "Nope."
Yeah, it's late, but holy crap did you see the save Ryan Miller laid on Tanner Glass last night? Glass is all like "that's going in" and the Jets are like "yeah!" but Miller is like "oh hell no" and flings that thing out of there, presumably accompanied by a whip-crack sound effect, and Jason Pomi...
"The Teacher Tells Me When A Girls Squirts That's Not A Organism": Top Recruit's Twitter Gets Him Expelled
Yuri Wright, the seventh-best cornerback in the country according to Rivals.com, is finding his options curtailed. Michigan has reportedly dropped its pursuit, and Rutgers is reconsidering a campus visit. Oh, and he got kicked out of high school, so he needs to find somewhere to finish his senior ye...
This Game-Winning Dunk Is The Best (And Maybe Only) Finish To A D-League Game You've Ever Seen
The Springfield Armor defeated the Maine Red Claws at the buzzer last night, thanks to an air ball and an athletic guard out of Wake Forest named L.D. Williams....
Today In Hilariously Misleading Headlines About NFL Playoff Bets Between Mayors
Wait. What? [CBS Boston]...
JaVale McGee's Mother Has Some Ideas About How The Washington Wizards Should Showcase JaVale McGee
The Washington Wizards may be complacent on the court, but no one works harder on finding hilarious ways to be dysfunctional. Today's contributor: JaVale McGee's mommy, who has complaints about her son's playing time, his role in the team's offense, and whether he's being coached properly....
There Will Be No More Kegs Or Student U-Hauls At Yale Athletic Events
After one woman was run over at the Harvard-Yale tailgate in November, Yale announced today that they've banned kegs and student-driven trucks from the tailgate, which will now end at kickoff. Guess that means more Ivy League football for all?...