hi Page 1631 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
I’ll Wear Shorts If I Goddamn Want To
Memorial Day weekend is coming to mark the start of summer, and once again I find myself confronted with assholes all over the place telling me I can't wear shorts. First there's designer Tom Ford:...
Jo-Jo Reyes Can't Win
We don't know if Jo-Jo Reyes was watching Wilson Valdez celebrate an unlikely W after six seasons as a non-pitcher, and we don't know if he's reading about it right now. We do know that if we were in his position, it would make us want to throw a goddamn chair through the window....
Phillies Infielder Throws 10-Pitch 19th Inning To Close Out Joey Votto And The Reds
Your morning roundup for May 26, the day after Disney realized that it probably wasn't the best of ideas to trademark American heroes for profit....
Shawn Marion Is Inexplicably Making A Reality Show Pilot
"The Matrix" must have let his nickname go to his head. Because he's filming a reality show that no soul could possibly want to see....
The Kim Kardashian Effect: Advanced Stats Show Why Kris Humphries Put A Ring On It
Nets forward Kris Humphries put up great numbers in the seventh season of his NBA career, his first as Kim Kardashian's beau. The couple announced their engagement (with a disturbing description of an "intimate family celebration" involving horses), and while there are no shortage of possible motive...
LeBron James Is Friends With Drake. Of Course He Is.
Drake, the child star-turned-hashtag-rapper who would have you believe that his last name is Ever and his first name is Greatest, has been sitting courtside at a lot of Miami Heat games this postseason. This is partly because he is rich and lives in Miami, and thus needs to be photographed doing ric...
Satirical, Non-Libelous Dan Snyder Group Fiction, Part IV: Cooke And Bligle Jim Escape To The Potomac
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Dan Snyder's dumbass libel suit chokes on a crab puff at a cocktail party. (For those of you keeping track, this is "We Are All Dave McKenna CX.")...
Kobe Wants More Of A Say In Who Will Be The Lakers' Sideline Prop
The Lakers are reportedly set to hire former Cavs coach Mike Brown to succeed Phil Jackson. Actual coach/GM Kobe Bryant is said to be "surprised" by the news because he expected to see L.A. assistant Brian Shaw promoted to the position and was "not a part of the decision-making process." [SI]...
For Just $400,000, You Can Buy This Portland-Based Co-Ed Kickball Team
From Deadspin's Portland Bureau—tipster Scott—comes a rec league kickball story. Sorry. Keep in mind this Craigslist ad was originally all in caps:...
Your Bulls/Heat Game Four Open Thread
Tom Thibodeau is coaching about as well in this series as Craig Sager is dressing. So much Bogans. So much Korver. So little stopping of LeBron, Wade, and even Bosh. Accordingly, the Bulls lost two consecutive games for the first time since February....
The Deadspin Guide To The New ESPN Book
The new ESPN oral history, Those Guys Have all the Fun, is now available in stores. We've been having some fun with the book in recent days. Mixed in with our usual sober analysis of satellite transponder rights and ESPN's dual-revenue-stream model, we've also brought you many tales of ESPN people s...
We Are All Dave McKenna CIX
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Snyder's dumbass libel suit finds its way into the wood chipper....
The Dead Wrestler Of The Week Archive
Brian "Crush" Adams (1964-2007): He played so many archetypes of '90s wrestling mythology that he became legendary at none, moving from persona to persona without fully leaving the last behind. No mention of his previous lives was made. He was a man without a history, unstuck in time. READ »...
MLB Will Probably Ask Us To Remove That George W. Bush Foul Ball Video, So Here's A Shitty Drawing I Made
You can watch it here, for now, but I think my drawing better conveys the emotional truth of the moment. Hope you like it....
Watch This 13-Year-Old Score A Rooneyesque Bicycle Kick Goal
Que golazo by this adolescent from the Civitans Bengals in Arlington, Virginia. I grew up in Arlington playing soccer and not hitting bicycle kicks like this. Note the kids on the other team putting hands to head, utterly demoralized. That's what a chilena will do for you. It's like 20 slam dunks ...
Here's Tim Thomas With The Best Save Of The Playoffs
That endorsement from hockey minds across Twitter tonight. Steve Downie, in a one-goal game, would probably agree....
We Are All Dave McKenna CVIII
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Snyder's dumbass libel suit self-immolates in shame....
A Rigorous Taxonomy And Analysis Of Lucky Charms From The 2011 NBA Draft Lottery
The darling of the NBA draft lottery last week was a sickly imp in a bowtie. The year before that it was a sorrowful widow in pearls. How did this come to pass? You can thank superstition (although not me for bringing you this post a week late). Sadly, too many NBA teams and executives still ignore ...
UPDATE: Oddibe McDowell's Water Bill Is $116.80 This Month, But He Has A Credit
Via Broward County Water and Wastewater Services....
Today In Bothering The NFL With Stupid Questions: Ray Lewis One-Man Crime Wave Edition
Yesterday, Ray Lewis made some eye-opening comments about the lockout. "Watch how much evil, which we call crime," he told Sal Paolantonio, "watch how much crime picks up, if you take away our game."...