hi Page 1697 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

What In God's Name Is Tim Duncan Doing To That Whale?
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Read This: The Pelé-Maradona Rivalry, Explained
The great Brian Phillips, on the Pelé-Maradona rivalry: "Pelé ... offers the child's narrative of sports heroism, an exuberant conquest of a just and welcoming world. Maradona ... represents the adolescent narrative: an unjust world forced to yield to a superior ego."...

EA Sports Co-Founder On The Key To <em>Madden</em>'s Success: Getting Players To Play With Themselves
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: co-founder of EA Sports, Jack Hiestand....

Cal Second-String Wide Receiver Is Third-Rate Rapper
For senior Alex "Loggy" Lagemann, the upcoming football season couldn't have come at a worse time: the addition of practices, study halls, and games to his schedule will only take valuable time away from his true passion: making awful, awful rap music....

Javier Hernandez’s Face Scores Important Goal Against Chelsea
On your first day at work, it's all about keeping your head down, not attracting too much attention to yourself, and definitely not doing anything clumsy/humiliating....

A Musical Tribute To Brandon Morrow's Almost No-Hitter
Brandon Morrow became the pitcher he never was for the Mariners yesterday, bedeviling the Tampa Bay Rays and striking out 17 in maybe the most dominant pitching performance of the year. Music via Annie....

World Sauna Championships End In Death
The finals of the annual Sauna Championships in Finland went horribly wrong, with the Russian competitor dying after suffering severe burns from withstanding 230-degree temperatures for six minutes. The Finn retained his title by only having to go to the hospital. [BBC]...

Weekend Winner: A Brand New PED Excuse
In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like our nation's poor, overtrained athletes like Brian Cushing, who says he flunked his drug test only because he worked out so hard....

Time for Quote of the Day Nominations
"Shooting 18-over par is not fun," Tiger Woods who, on Sunday, finished with the highest 72-hole score - 298 - of any PGA Tour event he ever played, even as an amateur. [AP]...

Phillies Fan Performs Bottlatio
Let it never be said that the No H8 Campaign doesn't have friends in the Phillies bleachers: Seconds 2 thru 6 of this brief video; three/four people up from the bottom right corner....

Baltimore Celebrates Roger Maris' Long Overdue Second Asterisk
Well lookie what happens when the Baltimore Orioles manage to win a few games in a row: They walk big ceremonial checks out at Camden Yards and make a scene about rewritten baseball history....

Not a Good Day for Tiger or Mistress Uchitel
PGA Championship's next week. How's Tiger doing at his warm-up event in Akron?...

Keyboard-Throwing Contest Goes About As Well As Expected
Like all fledgling non-Olympic sports, Keyboard Toss still has to work out a lot of kinks. Regulation equipment and throwing motions are good starts but they should probably focus on how not to hit the cameramen....

Donovan McNabb Has A Small Child In His Locker
Click to view Don't call Chris Hansen; Chris Cooley put it there to leap out and scare McNabb after the new QB finishes up with the media. Spoiler alert: it works. [Cooley Zone]...

Nationals Pitcher Shaves Mustache, Gains Ability To Pitch
Collin Balester was having trouble. He had a great mustache, but he wasn't pitching well at all. He had beaned Rickie Weeks and Mark Reynolds in the head. He needed to make a radical change. The mustache, unfortunately, would have to go....

When Intentional Walks Go Horribly, Horribly Wrong (Video)
Click to view What happens in extra innings when you need to intentionally walk the bases full but you've been possessed by the ghost of 2000 NLDS Rick Ankiel? Embarrassment! This is almost too painful to watch. [Today's Big Thing, MLBlogs]...

The Trick Shot Controversies Continue
The semantics battle between trick-shot crews continues today after news surfaced of a third claimant to the "world's farthest/longest/other synonym" shot title. Meet the corn-pone spitfires that make up the East Side trick-shot crew....

Last Night's Winner: The Case For Robot Umpires
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the fallibility of man, or at least of third base umpire Bob Davidson, whose blown call cost the Marlins the game....

How To Shoot A Shark In The Head
"I'm scared," squeals a child as the executioner brings his revolver to bear on the 7-foot bull shark, Nguyễn Ngọc Loan-style. Smile, you son of a— [via AnimalNY]...