hi Page 1879 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while remodeling Bubble Man's dorm room... • 5 p.m. — NASCAR: Coca-Cola 600, Concord, North Carolina. In a blind race test, what's more exciting: this race or the Pepsi 400? [FOX] • 7 p.m. — NCAA softball: Georgia at UCLA. There's no crying in softball, but there's no by-laws applicabl...
Sonics Ownership Seems To Be Unable To Delete Old E-Mails
Any mail client has it. Trash can. Deleted items. They all call it something different, but my God, it's right there. A half-terrabyte of data doesn't mean you save every freakin' Twitter message that comes your way. The Seattle Supersonics management might have gotten away with merely being hated i...
It's Delicious, It's Flavorful, It's The Everything Closer
See this everything bagel? No, you can't eat it. After all, it's just on a computer screen, and that would be foolish, even for you. Although your request to take a bite right now lets me know that you, too, believe in the power of the everything bagel. So today we're going to channel that untapped ...
Let The Sphincters Roar
Farts are funny, which is why there have been two stories sent to my inbox in the last 24 hours, both of which didn't have to do a very thorough job of explaining what they were about....
Weep Not For John Terry
David Hirshey writes regularly for Deadspin about soccer....
Has Jason Taylor Cha-Cha'd His Way Out Of Miami?
According to the latest reports, it appears the Miami Dolphins no longer want any part of defensive end Jason Taylor's suggestive dance moves or his football abilities ever again....
Obama's High School First In SI Survey. No Mention Of Ridgemont High
Barack Obama's high school, Punahou of Hawaii, was recently chosen as the school with the top athletic program in the nation by Sports Illustrated. This angered Hillary Clinton, who attended Maine East High in Parkridge, Ill., and John McCain, who was educated through oral tradition and cave drawin...
Tiny Man Celebrates Bulls' Blind Luck
The tiny man you see here — and "tiny," of course, is relative to two men standing next to him; in reality, he's probably 6-foot-9 — is Steve Schanwald, executive VP of the Chicago Bulls. He was a very happy tiny man last night; it's a good thing Chicago isn't a huge city with a potentially rabid f...
Celtics Use Rhythm Method, Belichick Craftiness To Beat Pistons
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who's still wondering why the Celtics were all up in LeBron's junk last series. When he's not focusing on the sordid past, he can be found mocking the laughable present at Basketbawful. Enjoy!...
Pro Athletes' Coffee-Fetching Aspirations
There's apparently a new trend surfacing in the privileged life of professional athletes: the crappy off-season, low-paying internship. Sure, plenty of athletes over the years have prepared themselves for a life after sports by exploring other opportunities. Many have not....
Use Your Urine To Kill Space Aliens
If you're like us, the art of urinating in a public restroom has become a rote, empty, stale ritual. We mean, come on: You just stand there. Where's the sport in that? Alas, we must now thank the fine people of Belgium for turning the act of urination into the competitive event we've all been beggin...
When Shopping For Fancy Soaps And Duvet Covers, Will Allen Takes No Chances
A confounding incident involving the Miami Dolphins' Will Allen at a Miami Bed, Bath and Beyond parking lot has the veteran cornerback being questioned by local police. There are conflicting stories and it's not entirely clear what the beef was about, but there is some speculation:...
Enjoying Porn and Chicken In Vilnius
Thanks to Ballin Europe for bringing us this video of Zalgaris' Marcus Brown speaking after his team's playoff victory. Brown must have consumed a lot of chicken and porn over the years, because the Murray State product is the Euroleague's all-time leading scorer.. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm goin...
Previewing the Running of the Horses
The Preakness Stakes is finally upon us and Maryland students couldn't be more eager to get fucked up in celebration (it's not a real party without Scott Van Pelt). Since I know incredibly little about horse racing, I've turned to Randy, a lover of both equines and Deadspin. His words are after the ...
Hey Kids! It's ESPN Rise! (Kill Me Now)
Those old enough to remember the launch of Sports Illustrated For Kids know what fun is in store for America with ESPN's newest venture, ESPN Rise. It's ESPN's attempt to go after the high school demographic with content — including a magazine, programming events and even a presence on SportsCenter...
Lance Briggs Is The New Shawn Kemp
You say you like the Athletes Making Babies site? Well, then you're gonna love the tale of the smooth operator that is Bears linebacker Lance Briggs....
Ricky Williams' Presence Means Every Little Thing Gonna Be Alright
It's easy to forget that the Miami Dolphins will once again have Ricky Williams in the backfield in 2008, but he's received Bill Parcells' support (amazing) and is rehabbed and ready to go for next season. In an interview with the Austin American Statesman, we find out that Williams, at 31, is much ...
Man: The Edmonds Thing Is Really Happening
Augh ... man, the Cubs really did sign Jim Edmonds. Other than Pujols or Willie McGee signing with those guys, we can't imagine our brains hurting more than they do to see this. And we're sure Cubs fans don't feel any better about it. Proceed with extreme caution, Jim; Cards fans can no longer prot...