hi Page 1938 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Mock Drafts Are Of No Interest To Joey Dorsey
Memphis forward Joey Dorsey does not share the popular view that Greg Oden is very good at basketball. Dorsey intends to show the world tonight that Greg Oden is, for lack of a better word, his bitch....

Cultural Oddsmaker: Who'll Be The Next Women's Coach To Be Ousted For An Inappropriate Relationship?
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him to let him know what you think....

Man, These Games Run LATE
Before we delve into last night's games, a legitimate question: Why doesn't the NCAA receive the complaints about the late endings of their most important games the way Major League Baseball does for scheduling the World Series so late? We know that they have to fit in two games, but the Ohio State-...

Joey Porter Might Have Gotten Himself Whupped
So you know how Joey Porter supposedly leveled Levi Jones during a fight in Vegas? Well, some more details on the fight have come out, and it's beginning to look like Joey didn't get the best of the exchange....

Sweet 16 Pants Party: Ohio State Vs. Tennessee
Ohio State Buckeyes (31-3) vs. Tennessee Volunteers (24-10) When: 9:57 p.m. ET Where: San Antonio...

We Think Ninjas Would Make Great Closers, Actually
You might think of Ryan Dempster as the red-bearded "closer" for the Chicago Cubs ... but he knows himself as something so much more. Ryan Dempster ... ninja!...

Introducing Tony Dungy's Least Favorite Sports Mascot
If the March Gayness blog pool at the Malcontent needs a costumed mascot, well, Flamy is available at very reasonable rates. Come to think of it, if he has the time, he could also be a fine representative of Manny Ramirez's grill-hawking efforts, or the next phallic-shaped object for golf's Christie...

Sweet 16 Pants Party: Memphis Vs. Texas A&M
Memphis Tigers (32-3) vs. Texas A&M Aggies (27-6). When: Tonight, 7:27 p.m. Where: San Antonio...

Ichiro's Super Happy Memory Challenge!
Via Seattlest and The Fanhouse, here's a video of some sort of "mind challenge" game show featuring the Mariners' Ichiro Suzuki. He seems to rather serious about the game, and, frankly, we're kind of intimidated, even though, obviously, we have no idea what he's saying....

Writing Up "Assault" In Joey Porter's Contract Was A Grand Idea
You might have thought Joey Porter punching guys in a Vegas hotel would be bad for his team. (Or calling opposing players "fags." Or attacking you with his dogs. Or pretty much anything else Joey Porter does.)...

Ozzie Guillen Is Back, And Man, He's The Best
You know baseball is almost upon us when Ozzie Guillen is saying crazy things again....

Come Out To The Ballpark ... And Die!
Talking your family to the ballpark can be a dangerous proposition. You could be hammered by a line drive. Lightning could strike the night you're honoring a great journalist. Milton Bradley could start pummeling you, just because it's a Tuesday....

OJ Mayo, Signing Off In Style
So on Saturday night, incoming star freshman O.J. Mayo, who was no longer in trouble over that marijuana business, played his final game as a high school player. How's it go? Well, he earned a technical foul and was thrown out of the game....

Xavier Fans Haven't Forgiven Greg Oden
If you were wondering whether or not Xavier fans had gotten over that whole Greg Oden pounding a guy to the floor business, the guy who runs the blog Free Xavier makes it clear that, uh, they're not....

Calipari Is Already Out There Recruiting
You know, it's one thing when puppies lick out of water bowls on a football field. That's cute, because they're puppies, and they won't grow up to resent their parents....

We'd Recommend Not Playing Blackjack With Joey Porter
When you put Joey Porter in the same room with a Cincinnati Bengal, in Las Vegas, no less, this is probably destined to happen...

They Should Let This Guy Kick The Ball More Often
That's Tottenham goalie Paul Robinson, wondering why it's so damn hard for anyone else to score a goal. He buried this one from 75 yards out against Ben Foster, who I believe had a bit of a smile on his face there before turning around and fishing the ball out of his own goal....

Tank Johnson Needs The Squirrel Master
Tank Johnson, the troubled Chicago Bears defensive lineman who was recently sentenced to 120 days in prison, is having problems making new friends in his new home. He's in protective custody, which means he's not having any contact with other inmates. When he first came into booking, though, Tank wa...

The Violent Side Of Greg Oden
While Tennessee and Virginia look to be going down to the wire, I thought we'd take a second and look back at yesterday's man-sized non-flagrant foul by Greg Oden. He always looks like a man amongst boys out there, but yesterday, with Ohio State needing to take a quick foul, he looked like Godzilla ...

Today in the Premiership...
• Manchester United 4-1 Bolton. Cristiano Ronaldo is as magnificent as he is handsome. He spent the day carving up the Bolton defense, setting up goals for Wayne Rooney (who had 2), and Ji-Sung Park (who also had 2). It was a dominating performance, but it didn't come without a price. Gary Neville s...