hi Page 982 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Calculus Of Enjoying Almaz Ayana's World Record
The Olympic 10,000 meters was eyeballs out, hands down the fastest, deepest women’s 25-lap race I have ever seen. But instead of cheers, before the race was even over, half of the commentariat lit up with shouts of “Dirty!”...

MLB Owns Darren Rovell Online For Posting Erroneous Picture
Darren Rovell—a living, breathing blazer from Northwestern’s business school—is fond of tweeting out pictures. Sometimes, it’s a cake that’s shaped like a shoe, and usually it’s a piece of truly fucked up junk food from a stadium. Tonight, he posted a very well-composed picture of the Chicago White ...

Philly Sports Radio World Rocked By True Story Of Fake Caller "Dwayne From Swedesboro"<em></em>
A local Philadelphia iteration of Skippy And Goatface’s Morning Sports Holocaust on 97.5 The Fanatic has an infamous caller: “Dwayne From Swedesboro.” Dwayne’s schtick is that he’s black, horny for white women, and runs into all sorts of paternity-test problems. According to an exhaustive, truly imp...

Andrew Benintendi May Have Just Made The Catch Of The Season
David Price pitched a gem for the Red Sox this evening, striking out eight men and only giving up two hits in eight innings of work. His night would have been a lot less spectacular, had Andrew Benintendi not flown across the outfield to leap up on top of the wall to rob Steven Souza of a dinger....

High School Athlete Charged With Sexually Assaulting Two Unconscious Women Gets Probation<em></em>
In April, East Longmeadow High School senior David Becker was charged with sexually assaulting two of his classmates at a party while they were unconscious. Prosecutors recommended that the three-sport athlete be found guilty, MassLive.com reported, on two counts of indecent assault and battery. The...

Chiefs Fans Viciously Brawl, Ignore Security At Rams Game
The Rams have only hosted two football games so far during their brief tenure in Los Angeles, but both of them have featured big fights in the bleachers. Last week, rival groups of Rams fans commemorated the first Rams game in L.A. by punching the shit out of each other. On Saturday, this Chiefs fan...

Trump Stooge On CNN: Hillary Clinton! Football! CTE? Just Saying ...
A Donald Trump supporter was invited on CNN this morning to yell about whatever it is Donald Trump supporters are yelling about these days. The Great Big Wheel Of Inane Bullshit happened to land on HILLARY CLINTON IS SICK AND FEEBLE, which led this anonymous Trump goon down a line of argument that e...

Why Your Team Sucks 2016: Washington Redskins<em></em>
Some people are fans of the Washington Redskins. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Washington Redskins. This 2016 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group. Read all the previews so far here. And buy Drew’s new book here....

Marathon Silver Medalist Feyisa Lilesa Says "Maybe They Will Kill Me" If He Returns To Ethiopia After Olympic Protest
As he crossed the finish line to win the silver medal in the Olympic marathon, Feyisa Lilesa crossed his forearms above his head in an “X,” a gesture of protest that resonated back home in Ethiopia. Lilesa said it was a risk. “If I go back to Ethiopia maybe they will kill me,” he said after the race...

Japanese Prime Minister Becomes Mario For Tokyo 2020 Segment
Japanese prime minister Shinzo Abe became Super Mario tonight in the traditional portion of the closing ceremony that previews the next Olympiad. Mario was joined by Pac-Man and famous anime figures, as well:...

Wrestling Bronze Medal Match Ends In Controversy; Mongolian Coaches Strip In Protest
Today’s 65kg freestyle wrestling bronze medal match between Uzbekistan’s Ikhtiyor Navruzov and Mongolian Ganzorigiin Mandakhnaran ended in controversy as Ganzorigiin was assessed a penalty for celebrating his victory early, costing him the victory. A subsequent penalty point came after the Mongolian...

Claressa Shields Defends Olympic Gold
Claressa Shields is the first-ever American to defend an Olympic gold medal in boxing after her middleweight unanimous decision over Dutch boxer Nouchka Fontijn. ...

A Truly Devastating Juke
The Chargers, who suck, are staring down a whole host of problems this season. Joey Bosa is only nominally a Charger, their offensive line is injury-prone and bad, and they are still owned by Dean Spanos, who manages to be both cruel and incompetent. Thankfully, Keenan Allen is young and strong, and...

The Secret To Convincing Your Significant Other To Let You Play Video Games Whenever You Want
So you’ve found the love of your life. The two of you somehow tolerate one another enough that you’ve decided to share a home. Now you’ve got a problem: How do you convince them to let you get away with all those eight-hour binges on The Witcher 3?...

What Would An MLB Crackdown On Infield Shifts Look Like?<em></em>
When I was a kid, I had a hard time understanding why there was only one shortstop on the infield. Someone probably explained to me that there are more right-handed hitters than left, but I still found the whole concept of infield imbalance unsettling. Why not be equally as prepared for left-handed ...
![Race Walk Leader Appears To Be Having Poop Problems [Updates: He Has Collapsed]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/u7sflo2jmani6kwj44yk.gif)
Race Walk Leader Appears To Be Having Poop Problems [Updates: He Has Collapsed]
French race walker Yohann Diniz is leading today’s 50k, but his competition hasn’t been a, uh, cakewalk? It looks like Diniz either has severe gastrointestinal issues—at times shoving a sponge down his pants to soak up wet fecal matter, and then throwing the sponge off toward the crowd—or stuck a bu...

Cubs Fans Enjoy Baseball Game
The ballpark has many sights and sounds: the crack of that ol’ hickory, vendors shouting about peanuts and crackerjacks, fans cheering for a big play. These two fans, apparently moved by the spirit of the romance of the ballpark, got a bit handsy on the concourse....

Eagles Kicker Out With Concussion After Getting Hit In The Head With A Stray Punt
A philosophical question: When does this Eagles season really start? Did it start when their prized draft pick got hurt in the preseason opener? Or perhaps when a DeSean Jackson fan enacted his praxis at the Democratic National Convention? No, the season started today, when Eagles kicker Caleb Sturg...

American Wrestler Helen Maroulis <em></em>Scores Upset Of The Olympics
Saori Yoshida is about as dominant as anyone in the international wrestling scene, having won three Olympic gold medals and 13 world championships. Women’s wrestling joined the modern Olympics in 2004, making Yoshida the only gold medalist ever in the 53 kilogram class. The Japanese wrestler had nev...
