hp Page 95 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
This Is What It Sounds Like When Bob Ley Raps
On Outside the Lines today, Bob Ley found cause to recite a few bars from Jay-Z's DeShawn Stevenson dis track "Blow the Whistle," which Hova recorded during the hilarious LeBron & Jay-Z vs. DeShawn & Soulja Boy feud a few years back. There was little reason to expect that when James said that resp...
A-Rod "Kosher" With Keeping Cousin Away From Locker Room, Doesn't Comment On Keeping Milk Away From Meat
Yuri Sucart, Alex Rodriguez's cousin and former steroid supplier, was again the subject of controversy after being spotted in the Yankees' hotel lobby in San Francisco. Sucart isn't allowed in the Yanks' locker room or any other team-controlled area. But did you know that Major League Baseball can't...
This Has To Be One Of The Best Police Sketches In Art History
Make fun of La Eace's artistry all you want. That's fine. Immature, but fine. Just ask yourself first: Would anybody who's ever seen that chap not recognize him instantly, thus saving the 75-year-old woman who was "abducted in broad daylight from a busy open-air shopping mall parking lot" in Crestv...
A Brief Interview With An Ohio State Fan Who Named His Kid "Tressel"
Andy Tomcho is a Cleveland native, former Ohio State student, and die-hard Buckeyes fan who, upon the arrival of his first-born son, graced him with the only name that made sense: Tressel Andrew Tomcho. Named, of course, for deified OSU football coach Jim Tressel. This was nearly two years ago, far ...
This Is One Way To Get Out Of Your Impending Wedding
To tell the Tale of Topless, Stimulant-Riddled, About-To-Be-Married "Sasha S," not much more beyond the "Drugged-up bodybuilder causes road carnage" headline is necessary. Well, other than the kicker:...
Clint Hurdle Is Fine, Everybody
So this morning we alerted you to the mysteriously magenta visage of Pirates skipper Clint Hurdle. He is fine. We know that, now....
Phillies Infielder Throws 10-Pitch 19th Inning To Close Out Joey Votto And The Reds
Your morning roundup for May 26, the day after Disney realized that it probably wasn't the best of ideas to trademark American heroes for profit....
Jose Canseco Tweets Obsession With Lady Gaga, But He Spurned Madonna, So...
Okay, I suppose there are a lot of things a little wrong with Jose Canseco's latest Twitter freakout, but there's a whole plane full of parallels we can't miss. And those parallels make this much more than the ramblings dribbling out of a disgraced slugger's Dorito-dusted fingers....
CBS Also Passes On Awful Sitcom About Mark Schlereth's Life
CBS revealed its 2011-12 primetime schedule today. We already knew it would lack the wretched Colin Cowherd pilot, but we now know that it doesn't have that god-awful Schlereth show either....
Bar Discounted Beer Every Time The Pirates Lost; Team Bullies Them Into Ending Promotion
The Pirates have done a lot of losing in recent years, and presumably, the franchise's comical ineptness has pushed people in Pittsburgh toward cheap swill during the summer months, when Jasons Kendall and Bay would supplant Crosby and Roethlisberger as the town's superstars....
The Next Stage Of College Baseball Rain Delays Had To Be Medieval Jousting
Choreographed dance sequences could only last so long, so here's the Radford pitcher Mark Peterson taking on High Point catcher Kyle Mahoney in a rain delay joust yesterday. What's the next most likely development? Red Rover? Double Dutch? Russian Roulette?...
Today In Great Ledes And Accounts Of Recidivism
When Heather Lockwood got to work at the Petoskey News yesterday, she likely had no idea that Freeze Plus P-wielding superhero Mark Wayne Williams was about to swoop into her life. But that's the thing with the Dark Knight. You never know where he is until it's too late. He's already got you. Just ...
Here's Video Of A Scottish Soccer Fan Attacking A Scottish Soccer Manager Earlier Today
With a 3-0 win over Heart of Midlothian (aka Hearts) at Tynecastle Stadium in Edinburgh, Scotland, Celtic moved to within one point of Rangers for the Scottish Premier League title. But, here's the real story:...
Ole Miss Students Have Laptops Stolen, Mom Of Young Thief Writes Cryptic Apology Letter To Them
I don't know what to make of this odd letter that came to us today. The email it was attached to gives some more of the zany details and, if it's true, it's remarkably fucked up....
Teenager Robs, Carjacks PNC Park Usher, Leaves Him To Die
This story is all kinds of horrifying. And, yeah, in part because we've seen how many cops are present at Pirates games to tase drunk folks....
Everything About This Ref-Getting-Leveled Video Is Amazing
There are better quality videos of English referee Sian Massey getting taken down yesterday. But they don't come with the built-in commentary....
Snapshot Of America: A Scene From The Philadelphia Crowd
Says reader Scott, who sent this in: "a red-faced, toothless whiskey tango of a Phillies fan taking a pack of Camels back from his kid is quite outstanding." Yes, yes he is. Click to enlarge for your full-size commemorative edition screengrab....
More Baseball Fans Care About Andre Ethier's Bowels Than Chipper Jones's Switch-Hitting Prowess
In tipster Zachary P.'s estimation, the difference between Andre Ethier's hit streak and Andre Ethier' shit streak is minimal. It is....
Here Are Both Of Last Night's 2OT Cockpunches
Playoff hockey overtime might be the single greatest thing in the sports world — assuming your team isn't involved. Then it's a war of nail-biting, heart-stopping attrition, destined to end in glory and highlight compilations for one side, and wondering why you even bothered staying up late for th...
The Lady Who Yelled At Cops To Stop Beating, Tasing The Patriotic Pirates Fan Was Fined $1,000
Remember the clearly patriotic Pirates fan who got billy clubbed and Tased at PNC Park earlier this month? Of course you do, but here's a link to it anyway. Dude's name is Scott Ashley. He's 40, from Friendship, but isn't due in court until May 25 to face charges of harassment, public drunkenness,...