i Page 5405 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Texas High School Nixes Football Team T-Shirt Featuring Rape Joke
A Texas high school forced its football team to get rid of T-shirts with the slogan, "Shhhhhhh[,] just let it happen," because we all know what the fuck they were implying....
Hey, Did You Know Bill Simmons And Ellen DeGeneres Have The Same Eyes?
From reader Kevin:...
AHL Changes Rules To Stop Goalies From Flipping Their Own Nets
On Sunday, Bridgeport Sound Tigers goalie David Leggio escaped a 2-on-0 breakaway by toppling his own net, happily opting to face (and stopping) a penalty shot. Terrified that the move would inspire other netminders, the AHL has enacted a rule change....
My Third-Grader, The Politician
Election Day, always a big event in D.C., was a whole lot bigger than normal here this year, if only in the McKenna household. Neither control of the U.S. Senate nor the fate of Obamacare factored into its bigness. Nah. This was all about Eddie running for office....
Columbia Basketball Player Drops Out Of College To Keep His Eligibility
Alex Rosenberg has withdrawn from Columbia University after suffering a foot injury that could keep him out more than two months, because it's the only way to insure he'll get to play a full senior season. Because amateur sports is totally about the education....
Otters Playing Keyboards
I've watched this like 50 times today. I think what gets me is that at first you think it's a bunch of otters, but with repeated viewings you realize it's mostly just the one little dude in the middle, shredding away. I made a joke in Deadspin Slack about this being better than a Genesis album, and ...
The Fuck Is Wrong With LeBron? Some Theories
Holy shit, the Cavaliers are 1-3! ONE AND THREE! OH MY GOD, CLEVELAND IS CLEVELANDING ALL OVER ITSELF AGAIN! Now, listen: I know that newly assembled teams like this need time to gel, and that the NBA regular season is fucking stupid, and that the Heat struggled in a similar fashion at first with...
Does Banana Bread Belong In Your Beer?
Bananas are pretty good. I'm not sure if Deadspin has ever issued a ranking of the fruits (editor's note: duh), but they probably have, and it was probably wrong, because everyone always underestimates kiwis and pretends to be too cool for apples. But if I were ever consulted on such a project, I'd ...
"He Reeked Of Jim Beam And Slim Jims": Your Best Mike Ditka Stories
Yesterday we posted Andy Richter's telling of Mike Ditka doing "one of the most senselessly arrogant & aggressive things" he'd ever witnessed. It seems that nearly everybody that has ever stepped foot in Chicago has a Mike Ditka story, usually involving cigars, booze, or both. Below are some of ...
Carter Ashton Suspended 20 Games For PED Use
Maple Leafs forward Carter Ashton has been handed a 20-game suspension, and will forfeit nearly $170,000 in salary, after testing positive for the banned substance clenbuterol. Ashton blamed it on his use of an asthma inhaler:...
Ole Miss's Fumbles Were The Most Damaging Plays This Week
After last week's tough loss to LSU, Ole Miss once again trailed a ranked division opponent in the fourth quarter. Ole Miss put together some promising drives, but two fumbles prevented the Rebels from retaking the lead and resulted in two of the costliest plays of the week, according to data fr...
Colin Kaepernick's Fumble Was The Most Devastating Play Of Week 9
Week 10 starts in a few hours, so while we can, let's finish cleaning house on Week 9. Down by three with ten seconds remaining, the 49ers were one yard away from the St. Louis end zone and appeared on the verge of victory. But Colin Kaepernick fumbled in what was not only the most detrimental pla...
How Man-Child Tight End Rob Gronkowski Revived The Patriots' Offense
Rob Gronkowski—whose skull houses one 14-oz. official NFL "The Duke" football, and whose circulatory system is chiefly responsible for the delivery of Natural Light—has been incredible for the last few weeks. Tom Brady's missed his best receiver at full speed, and they're making up for lost time. ...
Dolphins, Chiefs Agree To London Games In Hopes Of Hosting Super Bowl
The NFL has unveiled its 2015 "International Series"—three games to be played in London's Wembley Stadium, three teams forfeiting the competitive and financial advantage of a home game. Why on earth would anyone want to be the "home" team in London? Here's the really simple answer:...
Michael Beasley Reduced To Status As Kevin Durant Flunky
At one point early on in The Offseason: Kevin Durant, that HBO reality show aimed at getting its star better endorsement deals, walking brand Kevin Durant flies some of his buddies out to Los Angeles, where they intend to stay for the summer. We're introduced to Childhood Friend Cliff Dixon, Manager...
Adrian Peterson And Ray Rice Should Be Reinstated Now
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here....
Report: LeBron And Kyrie Irving Exchanged Words After Loss
The Cavaliers are off to sluggish start, sitting at 1-3 after dropping last night's game to Gordon Hayward and the Jazz. They lost Tuesday's game agains the Blazers by 19 points, and ESPN's Brian Windhorst is reporting that Kyrie Irving and LeBron James got into a "healthy" discussion after that gam...
<em>El Mariachi</em> Is A Feast Of Bloody Micro-Budget Silliness
There's a moment early in El Mariachi, the micro-budget 1992 movie that introduced Robert Rodriguez to the world, where our hero, an unnamed wandering musician, asks a bartender if he can work there, singing for tips. The asshole bartender laughs in his face and says that he'd never pay one guy ...
Alex Rodriguez Peed On My Floor, Says Wife Of A-Rod's Cousin
We can't be much clearer than that headline. Carmen Sucart, wife of A-Rod's cousin Yuri, says a few years back, Rodriguez once came to the Sucarts' house (that A-Rod gave to them) and threatened them to keep their mouths shut about his performance-enhancing drug use. Then, he peed on the floor as a ...