i Page 5592 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

These Dumb Dogs Can't Fetch For Shit
These doggies are dumb as hell, but they are also very good doggies....

Robert Kekaula Apologizes For Calling Fresno "The Armpit Of America"
Hawai'i football broadcaster Robert Kekaula got a dig in on Fresno at the end of Saturday's game against Fresno State, signing off by calling the California city "the armpit of America." Tuesday, Kekaula apologized for his accurate description....

Holiday Gift Guide: For The Football Lover In Your Life
Buying gifts for the football fan can be too easy. Sure, anyone can buy a personalized jersey with "DICKFACE" on the back and become the holiday hero for their friend who roots for the Giants and secretly always loved the nickname he was given when he rushed Sig Ep freshman year. You're not that per...

Bad Man Employs A Damn McChicken Sandwich As A Tool Of Spousal Abuse
A Des Moines man is in jail today, after he assaulted his pregnant wife with a goddamn McChicken sandwich. And not by feeding it to her! By throwing it at her and smashing it into her face. That's way worse!...

Fantasy Football Commissioner Is Fed The Fuck Up
A reader forwarded us this email, which he says was sent by the commissioner of his fantasy football league, Alex. To be succinct, Alex is fucking sick of everyone's bullshit. A $300 prize brings out the worst in people, apparently....

You're Never Too Old To Ball
Who says ballin' stops when you reach 65? Or even 70. Especially when you live in the land of milk and honey?...

Drink This And Celebrate Christmas Like A True Pennsylvanian
I finished the leftover turkey yesterday, which means today is Christmas. Tomorrow, barring anything unforeseen, will also be Christmas, as will each remaining day of 2014. Fine by me....

Black St. Louis Cops Organization Commends Rams Players
In response to the St. Louis Police Officers Association's demand that a handful of St. Louis Rams players who took the field in a "hands up, don't shoot" pose be punished for making a "tasteless, offensive and inflammatory" gesture, the Ethical Society of Police—an organization for black police o...

Corey Crawford Is Out A Few Weeks Because He Fell At A Concert
Corey Crawford's mysterious "lower-body" injury turned out to be a fairly hilarious one—the Blackhawks goalie says he missed a step and fell down while leaving a concert....

$5 off an Amazon Card, 36 Microfiber Towels for $14, and More Deals
Free Amazon money. Can't complain about that. Plus, if you use Google Checkout with this deal, you'll get a $5 Toys R Us card too. Plus, if you're creating a new Gyft account, you'll get a $5 account credit after your purchase. The code should work on other gift cards as well, if you'd prefer to sho...

The Time Manute Bol Hit Six Three-Pointers In A Half
Reader Max sent along this video because he'd never seen it before, never even heard of one of the weirdest NBA happenings of all time, and he thought more people should see it. I support that sentiment entirely: everyone should watch highlights of the night 22 years ago when 7-foot-7 Manute Bol dec...

Report: It's Not Johnny Football Time Just Yet
According to reports from NFL insider the 7-5 Browns are not going to start Johnny Manziel on Sunday against the Colts, despite the fact that Manziel played well after replacing struggling starter Brian Hoyer during last week's game against the Bills....

Report: Josh Donaldson, Billy Beane Had Heated Argument Over Days Off
Now that Josh Donaldson has left the Athletics, we can go to the next step: juicy stories about internal discord leaking to the media. This particular story describes a big argument between Donaldson and general manager Billy Beane....

The Bills Have Given Up On Toronto
After six seasons of minimal excitement and declining attendance, the Bills have officially killed the great Toronto experiment. ...

Kendrick Perkins Attempted To Post Up Anthony Davis. Try Not To Laugh.
Kendrick Perkins is an anthropomorphic pumpjack that somebody taught to play basketball. Anthony Davis is an unofficial member of the Avengers. This is what happens when the former tries to shoot over the latter in the post....

Screencap Classix: Has It Been Five Years Already?
Send stories, photos, and anything else you might have to [email protected]....

Mike Ditka Says He's "Embarrassed" For "Hands Up, Don't Shoot" Rams
Crappy leather-faced old man Mike Ditka has taken to the pages of the Chicago Sun Times to hit us with his take on the Ferguson protests, as well as the decision by a few Rams players to express solidarity with the protesters by walking onto the field in a "hands up, don't shoot" pose. ...

Nets Superfan Ejected, Carried Out Of MSG Without His Prosthetic Leg
In what will go down as the most exciting moment of either team's season, a well-known Nets fan was physically ejected from last night's game against the Knicks. His prosthetic leg—which security guards said he had used to hit another fan, something disputed by multiple eyewitnesses—was left behind....

Cincinnati Turkey Trot Finish Line Looted, Bagels Feared Lost
Last Thursday, thousands of people across the country participated in Turkey Trots before returning to their homes to eat turkey. Except in Cincinnati, Ohio, where participants at the Thanksgiving Day 10K Race stripped finish line refreshments like a biblical plague of locusts. ...

The Ludicrousness Of St. Louis Rams Vs. St. Louis Cops, By Jon Stewart
We've become accustomed to all this by now, but since not everyone can catch The Daily Show it's become our responsibility to bring it to you: the inevitable takedown of this weekend's ridiculous apology-non apology about the St. Louis Rams doing "Hands up, don't shoot" before their game Sunday....