i Page 5650 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Deadspin Up All Night: I'll Suffocate If She Tries
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Stay humble; stay blessed....

Police: Broncos Safety Punched Cab Driver, Tried To Hide In Mulch
John Boyett, a former Colts safety who was arrested in Sept. 2013 while yelling, "You can't arrest me, I'm a Colts player," was arrested Wednesday in a Denver suburb after the Broncos practice squad player's outing at a bar ended with him allegedly trying to hide from police by covering himself in m...

Watch These Non-Ohioans Try To Eat Gross-Ass Cincinnati Chili
Here's twelve non-Ohioans (West-Coasters, specifically) trying to choke down some signature Ohio foods. There's a pretty broad selection of foods, here—Glier's goetta and so forth—but the centerpiece is the Skyline 3-way; they start eating it around 2:10 in the video. Spoiler alert: They think i...

HS Football Team's Season Cancelled After Reports Of Waterboarding
The Central Bucks West High School football team in Doylestown, Penn., has had the last two games of its season cancelled after an internal investigation revealed that members of the team had engaged in "improper conduct." According to police, several of the football players participated in hazing r...

Branden Oliver Is San Diego's New, Improved Darren Sproles
The Chargers looked stacked at running back before the season started. Ryan Mathews would lead, Danny Woodhead would find some carries and work as a frequent pass-catcher, and Donald Brown would do... something—So nice to have you, Donald! By Week 5, Mathews, Woodhead, and Brown were sidelined by in...

Bangalore Leading The Pack Of Worst Marathons To Run
Some marathons are big and some marathons are small, and one in particular sounds like the worst race ever run. ...

This Ridiculous Érik Lamela Goal Will Make You Feel Things
OK. Forget the stakes for a second. Forget that these are two bored teams playing in a second-tier tournament. Forget that Érik Lamela has gone his whole career without developing anything resembling a right foot, and still probably makes more money in a week than you do in a year. Is this the sexie...

Zach Mettenberger Looks Ready, Titans Fans
Your new starting quarterback looks like a winner, or a man about to make a scene at Mapco because they stopped beer sales. It's one of those....

What This Woman Did For An Aging Basketball Player Will Warm Your Heart
Illuminada Magtoto, a 90-year-old Miami resident, recently gave back to her community by agreeing to play in a one-on-one game with Dwyane Wade, an inspiring local man who refuses to let his old age and withered body stand in the way of his dream of playing in the NBA....

Your Local Team’s Fanbase Should Be Dying. Why Isn’t It?
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here....

The Hater’s Guide To Your Local Halloween Store
Every year, when October rolls around, some enterprising fellow in my area rents out an abandoned Dollar Tree and turns it into a pop-up Halloween Megastore, resplendent with costumes and decorations and fitting rooms that almost certainly now house the Ebola virus. Almost everything in these sto...

Kevin Kolb Is Still Messed Up From Concussions
Former NFL quarterback Kevin Kolb gives The MMQB an as-told-to today, and it's weird to think of him as a "former" anything already. But a series of concussions ended his career and righteously fucked with his body and his brain, and it sounds like a good thing he called it quits when he did....

Which NBA Coach Was Caught Masturbating In College?
Earlier this week, I solicited entries for our upcoming GREAT MOMENTS IN BEING CAUGHT JERKING OFF. And there were many fine submissions, but one anonymous reader sent in this blind item—totally unverified but amusing nonetheless—that deserves to stand on its own. Take it away, sir… ...

What In The Damn Hell, Paula Deen
Above, via Eater, is a recent advertisement for Paula Deen's Lady & Sons restaurant. It features a black employee of Deen's restaurant, whose job, in our estimation, is to pretend to be a slave. This is her job because Paula Deen wants to sell food to people who will take pleasure from playacting ...

Chris Douglas-Roberts Is Bringing Short Shorts Back To The NBA
Chris Douglas-Roberts signed a one-year deal with the Clippers, and is taking advantage of the opportunity to inflict untold horrors on the basketball-loving public. Douglas-Roberts asked for medium-sized shorts. Functionally, those are short shorts....

Great Divide Oatmeal Yeti Is A Neat, Sweet Beast Indeed
Big, boozy stouts tend to be expensive, and a lot of drinkers regard them as seasonal treats, so they're not among the most popular beers from a straight sales perspective. But if you brew a stout with an alcohol-by-volume percentage over eight and give it a price tag north of $7 per 22-ounce bott...

Jeanie Buss Goes In On "Losers" Who Don't Want To Play With Kobe
Things aren't going so great for the Los Angeles Lakers right now. Their head coach is dead set on implementing a caveman brand of basketball that may very well turn the Lakers into the worst team in the NBA, and a recent story by ESPN's Henry Abbott painted Kobe Bryant as a self-sabotaging sociopat...

Huge Upgrades For Your Home Network, Better Blenders, and More Deals
If you aren't totally satisfied with your home network, Amazon's got a ton of deals for you in today's Gold Box....

My Friends, It Is Time To Send Brooklyn Beneath The Waves
One of the challenges of writing about things on the internet is having the discipline to contain yourself, for the sake of being able to call an item of work finished instead of knitting it into some mammoth all-encompassing rant about, like, American culture or capitalism or the human condition or...