i Page 5717 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Police: Ex-High School Wrestler Steals Beach Cart, Assaults Five People
Lukas Iorio, a former champion wrestler from Bergen Catholic High School (N.J.), was arrested Sunday for an alleged Jersey Shore beach cart rampage that totaled at 13 charges against him and at least five fights....

Norichika Aoki Ends Up In A Heap With The Worst Swing This Season
Why did Royals outfielder Norichika Aoki swing at this offering from Astros pitcher Jarred Cosart? That was bad, Nori....

Johnny Damon Gets Payback, Cuts Off Manny Ramirez's First Pitch
The Boston Red Sox held a 10th-anniversary reunion for players from the 2004 championship team before tonight's game. New Iowa Cubs player-coach Manny Ramirez tossed out the first pitch, until Johnny Damon came out of nowhere to snag it for justice, ten years later....

What's Roy Hibbert's Impact On Defense?
Offensively, Roy Hibbert has been all over the place these playoffs. Well, "all over the place" isn't exactly right, he's paired a couple of good games with many terrible ones, adding his fourth zero-point outing in Monday's loss. But even at his offensive worst, it's important to remember that Hibb...

Deadspin Up All Night: Make Up Your Mind
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. NYHC....

Dolphins Scout Says He Was Fired For Staying Home To Care For Sick Wife
So, this is not a very good look for the Miami Dolphins, an organization which has pretty much become synonymous with "bad looks" over the course of the last year or so. According to a intent-to-initiate-litigation letter obtained by Fox Sports, a former Dolphins scout plans to sue the team over his...

Spelling Bee Semifinalists Set To Ultimate Warrior's Intro Music
Is there anything better than watching kids gleefully race to the stage after hearing their names called as Scripps National Spelling Bee semifinalists? Yes, there is! It's watching kids gleefully race to the stage with the Ultimate Warrior's theme music, "Unstable," as musical backing....

Charlie Whitehurst Arm-Wrestled A Punter For A Uniform Number, And Lost
Charlie Whitehurst, who signed on to be the Titans backup, has never worn anything but No. 6 in his eight-year career. There was one problem: That's been punter Brett Kern's number since he came to Tennessee in 2009. The usual solution would be for Whitehurst to make Kern an offer for it. They went ...

Rebuttal: No, CrossFit Does Not Terribly Maim Or Disfigure
A video released yesterday claims to be the "Ultimate Crossfit [SIC] Fails Compilation," during which you see a common theme of pain and worst-case scenarios in the gym. Problem is, that's not CrossFit, according to a company rep....

Rick Reilly Writes A Love Letter To Derek Jeter's Unborn Children
This is how Rick Reilly's latest column, which is about Derek Jeter, begins:...


ESPN's Darren Rovell Now Just Straight-Out Rewriting Press Releases
Everyone gets what posthuman ESPN sports business reporter Darren Rovell is all about by now. He passes on useless trivia, acts like a cock on Twitter, reminds us that the world is a dark, sad, and terrifying place, and serves as a pure conduit for any business looking to pass on a brand message to ...

Roomba Under $200, Nike Golf Balls, $70 Android Phone With No Contract
Unleash your inner Jetson by outsourcing your chores to an obedient robot. Yes, it's refurbished, but this is about as cheap as you'll ever see a Roomba. [Refurb Roomba 530, $195]...

Prosecution: Aaron Hernandez Killed Two Men Over A Spilled Drink
Aaron Hernandez was arraigned today for the drive-by murders of Daniel Abreu and Safiro Furtado outside a Boston club in July 2012. He pleaded not guilty, and for the first time, the prosecution offered a suspected motive: disrespect....

We Need To Talk About <em>True Detective</em> (No, We Don't)
If you want news about the second season of True Detective, a gritty HBO anthology series that just wrapped its wildly popular first season in March, you don't have to look very hard....

Rory McIlroy Did Not Let Caroline Wozniacki Down Easy
The reigning sports power couple publicly split a week ago, when Rory McIlroy announced his wedding to Caroline Wozniacki was off, just after sending out wedding invitations. The timing was rough; the method was rougher. ...

Heat Fan Grandma Is A Pretty Great Grandma
This grandma is a really big fan of the Miami Heat, and so her grandson decided to record her while she watched Game 4 of the Eastern Conference finals. Based on the video evidence, watching a game with this lady is probably be a lot of fun....

The <em>Sleeping Beauty</em> Reboot You Never Wanted: <em>Maleficent</em>, Reviewed.
Back in 2006, Patton Oswalt had a standup bit where he fantasized about going back in time and killing George Lucas so he'd never make the Star Wars prequels. In the imaginary conversation, Lucas tries to sell Oswalt on those reviled films by assuring the comedian that all the things he digs about t...
![[Sustained Vomiting Noises]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/f5fh3vktnjv7n1ywk7xp.png)
[Sustained Vomiting Noises]
Cardinals fans will occasionally take a break from telling you how classy they are to announce that some outsider has achieved the rarefied level of class necessarily to be a Cardinal. Congratulations, Derek Jeter. If only you had been drafted by St. Louis, perhaps you would have amounted to somethi...
