i Page 6960 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Horrible Quotes About A Soccer Player's Torn Scrotum
From Andy Hessenthaler, manager for League Two side Gillingham:...

Grab Your Pitchforks, Here Are The Pro Bowl Rosters
That one player's inclusion/exclusion is clearly a stain on the integrity of the Pro Bowl, and represents the league's obvious bias for/against that team. [NFL.com]...

Confessions Of A Sports Bigamist
We're doing a season-long NFL roundtable with our friends at Slate. Check back here each week as a rotating cast of football watchers discusses the weekend's key plays, coaching decisions, and traumatic brain injuries....

Jeromy Burnitz Used To Fill Clubhouse Shampoo Bottles With His Own Urine
Peter Abraham of the Boston Globe, who posted his Hall of Fame votes and column earlier today, slipped in an interesting aside about the clubhouse shenanigans of former MLB outfielder and HOF candidate Jeromy Burnitz:...

Cam Newton > Tim Tebow
On the McLaughlin Group on Sunday, the panelists were giving out year-end political awards, and Rich Lowry, the guy from the National Review last seen wiping starbursts off his khakis, gave one to Tim Tebow, for being the most exciting thing in American sports right now, or some such thing. It wasn'...

Don Cherry's Piano Desk Will Make All Analysts Self-Conscious About Their Gesticulations
A lot of television personalities talk with their hands and bang their fingers on the well-lit lucite before them. It's the larynx-friendly method of conveying outrage. They think no one is watching, but they are wrong—as evidenced by this clever YouTube user's "Don Cherry's Piano Desk." You have ...

"I'm Not Coaching After 2017!" Rick Pitino Prematurely Ejaculates
Rick Pitino announced today that he will stop coaching once his Louisville contract runs out after the 2016-17 season: "When you're 59, you're realistic that you don't have a whole lot of years left," Pitino said at a news conference before the No. 4 Cardinals play Georgetown on Wednesday. "My contr...

Today In Insane Sentences: Rex Ryan Tells Stephen A. Smith That Peyton Manning Won't Replace Mark Sanchez
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Coach stays positive on the Sanchize....

100 Percent Of The NBA's Asian-American Population Now Plays For The Knicks
The Knicks added Jeremy Lin to the roster last night in an effort to fix the fact that they have zero depth in the backcourt. He's the league's lone Asian-American player, and he's also the only Harvard grad in the pros. Get this kid a billboard....

A Plea For TV Networks To Show People Running Onto The Field
Big thank you to Drew for letting me guest this Funbag. Normally my day is filled with exploiting my elderly father for money (see: Shit My Dad Says), so it was a welcome diversion. I also used to write for the TV show of the same name, until America was like, "GOD FUCKING STOP THIS SHIT TAKE IT OFF...

As Far As ESPN Is Concerned, Not A Single Hockey Player Died This Year
SportsCenter's annual Year In Review show enters heavy rotation on the WWL this week, and as is tradition, it includes an "In Memoriam" segment recognizing the athletes and sports figures lost in 2011. Puck Daddy has the complete list of those honored:...

30 Paragraphs About 30 Teams From The Basketball Prospectus Guide To The Truncated NBA Season
The following is an abridged preview of an abridged NBA season, culled from the team chapters of the ever-incisive Pro Basketball Prospectus. Buy the book as a PDF for $9.98. ...

Dottie Sandusky Maintains Her Husband's Innocence, May Go On Oprah With Him
Dottie Sandusky, who publicly defended her husband's innocence for the first time earlier this month, may join Jerry for another televised interview after the new year. Jerry Sandusky's lawyer, Joe Amendola, told the Harrisburg Patriot-News this week that the two may sit down with Oprah, Barbara Wal...

Cameraman On Segway Makes For Incredible Views Of Cricket Pitch, Humiliating Crash
Joe Previtera, an Australian television cameraman known as "Joe the Cameraman," got his karmic return 12 years after his infamous "sledging" (or insulting, in cricket speak) of a cricketer during a 1999 match when he fell off of his Segway during an Australia-India test match yesterday....

The Mets Are Trying To Stop R.A. Dickey From Climbing Mount Kilimanjaro
Dickey, the Mets' knuckleballing ace, wrote on NYTimes.com that Hemingway inspired him to climb Kilimanjaro, the 19,341-foot Tanzanian peak. He's taking the climb to raise awareness of teenage prostitution in Mumbai....

MLB's New Security Chief, A Former SF Giant, Once Denied Monica Lewinsky Entry To The Oval Office
It's weird to think about MLB executives doing anything other than MLB-executive-ing. I can't think of Bud Selig cutting timber, for example. But a story in the Washington Post introduces us to Bill Bordley, the league's new chief of security, who pitched for the Giants before joining the Secret Ser...

49ers Release Braylon Edwards
The Niners let Edwards go today, proving that no good deed goes unpunished. Anyone need a gimpy deep threat with bad hands for the playoffs?...

ShortCenter: Drew Brees's Record Inspires A Lot Of Man Love
What is ESPN prattling on about right now? We condense your morning SportsCenter to its essence....

Ilya Kovalchuk Scored A 180-Foot Own Goal, And They Credited It To Cam Ward
When I saw the scoresheet for yesterday's Devils/Hurricanes game, I mostly ran around in circles yelling "Goalie goal!" over and over again. For fans of novelty highlights, goalie goals are up there with unassisted triple plays as one of the rarest and most valuable sporting occurrences....

Drew Brees's Birthmark Must Be Contagious, Sean Payton Now Looks Symptomatic
Your morning roundup for Dec. 27, the day we learned Christmas lights have a final resting place. Photo via Mocksession. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....